The Infinite Roommate Recombination
by Boys3allC
Summary: How would Leonard handle it if he had to deal with Sheldon and Amy living together the way Sheldon has had to deal with Penny living with Leonard? What happens when the new living arrangements lead to some surprising revelations on both sides?
1. Roomies

Leonard was the happiest he had ever been in his entire life, everything seemed to be falling into place. Penny had given up her apartment a month ago and had been living with him and Sheldon it just made sense financially. They were going to be moving to the apartment above the one they lived in now next week. Sheldon seemed better with all the changes especially knowing he was just going to be on the floor above him. Leonard was packing up the rest of the stuff in his bedroom when Penny walks in. It still amazes him how beautiful she is and that she belongs to him. Penny looks super excited about something and her smile is infectious.

"I just got the most exciting news! You will never in a million years guess what just happened!" Penny squeals.

"You finally agreed to marry me after me a asking you on a bi-yearly basis and now I am finally moving out of Sheldon's apartment? How wait that already happened!" Leonard says

"While that is very exciting news,that was not what I was talking about. Do you remember that movie I auditioned for a couple weeks ago? That indie film about the serial killer sisters?"

"Yeah, I thought you lost the part to that girl as who could do all those different accents?"

"I did but she broke her leg jet skiing and I was their second choice!"

"So you got the part! I am so proud of you Penny! Life seriously could not get any better!"

"Hold that thought for a minute, OK,."

"Why? Oh god you are not leaving me now that you have struck it big are you?"

"No! I hardly call a low budget indie film striking it big but I will have to shoot on location for eight weeks."

"OK where is location? "

"Deep Deep south we are talking rural Georgia, it is about southern serial killer sisters which is why little miss accent got the part in the first place."

"When does it start?"

"Next week, please do not be mad!"

"Mad I am not mad! This is wonderful I am so proud of you! So I will live by myself for the first eight weeks that is no problem."

"Oh thank you Leonard! You are being so great about this I was worried that you would freak out" Penny says wrapping her arms around Leonard and kissing him, the kiss deepens and he moves her toward the bed. He knocks off the stuff he has been piling there and she climbs on top of him. Leonard loses himself in Penny and any dissapointment he feels in their sudden change of plans dissapates.

The next morning Leonard's spirits are slightly dampened but he tries to look at the bright side he still will be moving out. He decides to go upstairs and ask when he can start moving his things in. If the apartment is already clear then maybe he can start a little early and he and Penny can have some alone time before she goes on location. When he gets upstairs he knocks on the door and is very surprised to see an apartment that looks like the occupants have no intention of moving. There is not a box in sight an older woman opens the door.

"Hi I am Dr Leonard Hofstadter and I am supposed to be moving into this apartment next week and I was wondering when you expected to be out?"

"What are you talking about? I am not moving out for another two months."

"When I signed the lease it says that you are going to be out in March, next week is March."

"No it says May." She retrieves some papers of the side table and sure enough the move out date says May. "I am sorry son but my condo in Boca won't be ready til then."

"Oh no, it is fine, see I just live down stairs anyway and my girlfriend who I am moving in with will be on location for her movie for eightweeks anyway." Leonard explains to the woman.

"That's nice dear, hope your girlfriends movie goes well." she gives a sarcastic wink when she says girlfriend and shuts the door in his face.

"Its fine", Leonard reassures himself on the way back down, this way is better Penny would not be living with him anyway for eight weeks. Six more weeks of Sheldon if he handled eight years he could handle eight weeks.

" Good news!" Leonard says to Sheldon who is sitting on the couch watching TV.

"You finally realized that your career is a failure and took my advice and started teaching?" Sheldon deadpans not looking up at him.

"Two more months." Leonard mumbles under his breath "No, there was a little misunderstanding with the lease and it looks like I will not be moving out for another two months. Two more months of me! Yeah!" Leonard says raising his hands in the air.

"I am sorry Leonard but you cannot stay here another two months."

"What do you mean? You freaked out when you found out that I was moving out what do mean I cannot stay?"

"I have made other arrangements."

"What other arrangements! I have been here the whole time I never saw you interviewing other roommates."

"I never said I did."

"Then why can't I stay?"

"Amy will be moving in next week."

"Amy? Since when?"

"Since next week, I believe I just told you that Leonard."

"No I understood that part what I meant is when did you decide this?"

"Oh! I understand, your confusion, you are wondering how such a major life event as deciding to move in with ones girlfriend came about without it coming across your notice."

"Yes!"

"I do not tell you everything Leonard."

"No but Amy does tell Penny everything."

" I made her sign a non- disclosure agreement. "

"OK, I am still curious how the man who ran away from everything changed his stance so drastically."

"During my travels I had an ephiany, while I relish being alone and having the time attend to my thoughts. All my brilliant thoughts mean nothing if their is no one there to tell me how brilliant they are. Amy enjoys telling me how brilliant I am."

"What a lucky girl, But Sheldon the fact remains that Penny has already given up her apartment and I have no where to go until the neighbor upstairs moves out."

"OK I will ask Amy about the matter when I see her tonight."

"Tonight is not date night."

"On the contrary we now have weekly date nights which have escaped your notice completely."


	2. Wait? What!

Sheldon rides the bus to Amy's apartment, it is funny to think that this will be the last time that he knocks three times on door 314. Amy answers the door this date night is a packing date night and she is wearing an old college sweat shirt and jeans. It is funny to see her outside of her normal attire.

"Hello Roomie." she answers the door and Sheldon walks in.

"Hello Amy, I am afraid I have some upsetting news on the roommate front." Sheldon says sitting down on her couch pity this old thing will be going into storage he thinks he has some good memories on it.

"What the hell Sheldon! I already gave up the apartment! I have to be out next week!"

"Why are you yelling at me?"

"Because you are getting ready to tell me that I cannot move in!"

"No, I never said that, you interrupted me and started yelling at me."

"I am sorry,I just assumed, what is the bad news?"

"Leonard made a mistake on his lease and the apartment that he was moving into will not be ready for two months. He has asked me if he can stay in his old room until the old occupants move."

"Well most of my stuff is going into storage, and we agreed that my bedroom would be mostly for show and we would be sharing a room anyway. I do not mind with Leonard stays with us for a little while."

"I was hoping you would say that, you are so understanding."

"It would be better if it were Penny but if wishes were gumdrops right?" Amy says shrugging her shoulders.

They spend the rest of the night packing up Amy things their is only few boxes that are slated to be moved into his apartment but the thought still overwhelms Sheldon. How were all of her things going to mix with all of his things? He would have to make room in his closet for all her clothes seemed like a lot of work. Yet when they say good bye and she kisses him he remembers why he is doing all of this. Those months without her were hell and while it may be hard mixing her into his life ,life was infinitely worse without her.

When he returns to the apartment Leonard is laying on the couch face down. He swears he will never understand that man he is the weirdest person he knows. He walks over to him and raps him on the shoulder he turns and looks at him.

"What do you want?"

"Right now for you to get off my spot so I can sit down." Leonard gets up and leans against the other side of the couch."

"Penny is leaving tomorrow for her movie." Leonard says lifting up his glasses and rubbing his eyes.

"I know, Bernadette is throwing a break a leg party for her tomorrow… Which is ironic because the girl she is replacing did in fact break her leg. Do you know how that phrase got coined Leonard?"

"No, and I do not care, I have bigger things to worry about like how I am going to be homeless next week."

"No you're not, I talked with Amy and she thinks it is agreeable if you stay with us until your apartment is ready. Unlike you and Penny ,me and my gal pal are just fine with having a third wheel around."

"How generous of you, but where am I going to sleep?"

"In your room of course." Sheldon says rolling his eyes

"Where is Amy going to sleep?"

"In my room, and before you get the chance to ask yet another tedious question, the answer to the question where you going to sleep is yet again in my room."

"Are you getting bunk beds or something?"

"Bunk beds! why in the world would I get bunk beds? The occupant of the bottom bunk risks being crushed in their sleep by the person on the top. While the person top has to sleep with one eye open or risk plummeting off the bed in the middle if the night. No Amy will be sleeping in the same bed as me."

"I am sorry Sheldon but I find that a little incredible. I have lived with you for eight years and have only been allowed to enter your room a handful of times."

"People change Leonard, and besides their are certain advantages that arise of Amy sharing a bed with me. Good night. "Sheldon says winking at Leonard getting up and going to his bedroom.

"Wait what!" Leonard calls after him


	3. Party Frivolities

The party is in full swing Bernadette has thought of everything and everyone is having a great time. Except for Sheldon who did not want to come at all and Leonard who does not want Penny to go. They sit together on the couch each looking very uncomfortable. They watch the party progress around them. Penny is wearing the little black dress that Leonard loves she looks so happy and so beautiful that it makes his heart hurt.

"I hate parties all this forced frivolity just grates on my nerves. Amy says I had go to support Penny, looks like she has plenty of support without me here."

"I can not believe she is going to be gone for eight weeks! Just a couple days ago I was the happiest I had ever been in my entire life and now everything is bleak. There will be no sunshine while she is gone."

"Oh please Leonard, Penny had to endure your absence when we went to the artic and then again when you worked on Stephen Hawkings project I think you can handle eight weeks."

"We were not together when I went to the artic." Leonard says grumpily

Amy makes her way over to the couch and sits on the arm next to Sheldon. She hands him a glass of champagne and he looks at it oddly and holds it in his hand.

"Thank you for coming tonight I know parties make you uncomfortable."

"You are welcome, I think I have performed my duties as a supportive friend, can we go now?"

"Soon, I was wondering if now would not be an excellent time to inform the others of our new living arrangement? I have not breathed a word of it to anybody per our non disclosure agreement. Seeing as though Leonard will be living with us as well it just makes sense to announce it to the group."

"You know that speaking in crowds this large is not my strength and I am sure Leonard has informed the others, if not him then Penny certainly has by now."

"Actually I have not told anybody yet I have had other things on my mind than your weird relationship." Sheldon gives Leonard a look and Leonard shrugs his shoulders.

"It would mean a lot to me if you were to announce it to the group Sheldon. Just drink the champagne it might loosen you up a bit."

"You know I do not drink Amy."

"One glass of champagne would not kill you Sheldon and you do drink sometimes."

"Very well." He says emptying the flute then getting up and clinking his glass "Attention everyone, first I would like to congratulate Penny on her acting job and say I hope this ends her long career dry spell. Sheldon grabs a second flute of champagne from Amy's hand and downs that as well. "Secondly I would like to announce that Amy Farrah Fowler and I have decided to move in together with Leonard moving out and getting married it seems to be the logical solution to my roommate problem and also I love her." with that declaration he grabs Amy around the waist and gives her a big kiss on the mouth the kiss deepens and the rest of the party look on in amusement and confusion.

"Holy crap" Howard says "That is terrifying, is it bad that I keep expecting him to rip off her head at any moment like a giant praying mantis?"

"Oh Howie stop, I think it is sweet! Who knew Sheldon had it in him?" Bernadette says

"Also I think it is the female praying mantis that rips off her partners head dude." Raj says draining the rest of his glass.

"He rips off her head, she rips off his either way it would seem more natural than what I am seeing right now."

Amy breaks the kiss and flushes bright red extremely pleased and a little embarrassed. The group goes over to congratulate the couple on their big step forward. Penny hugs Amy and then Sheldon.

"Aww sweety! I am so proud of you I think I might cry!" she says to Sheldon "When I first met you I would never thought I would see you like this all happy and in love and not like a weird robot man at all!"

"Thank you Penny, although for the record I never minded being thought of as robotic."

"I know sweety." Penny says patting him on the shoulder.

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	4. Cohabitation

It is moving day and Leonard is shocked to see that Amy has only moved in three boxes of her stuff.

"Amy you had a whole apartment why do you only have three boxes?"

"Sheldon and I agreed that in order to not overwhelm him I would only appropriate my items with his at a rate of three personal affects per month. I was going to use your room as a woman cave as it were but seeing as though your items are still in place I have put the majority of my things into storage."

"Oh I am sorry Amy, I will only be here for two months so you will have your woman cave soon enough."

"Sorry does not get my book collection out of storage does now Leonard?"

"I am going to my man cave." Leonard says storming off to his bedroom

Leonard emerges from his room a little while later and feels bad for snapping at Amy. It is not her he is mad at it is the situation in general, he thought that he would be on his own with Penny by now and instead he is the odd one out in his own apartment. Sheldon and Amy are no where to be seen they must be off moving more stuff. Leonard decides to go get everyone dinner as an apology for his earlier behavior.

"I brought dinner!" he calls as he enters the apartment "Wednesday night special!"

"I wish you hadn't done that" Sheldon says

"Yes, I have made dinner for us already."

Amy and Sheldon are sitting at the dining room table eating dinner. Leonard gets annoyed all over again not only are they eating without him but they are eating at the table Sheldon threw a giant hissy fit about having in the first place.

"Since when do you eat anything but Thai food on a Wednesday night?

" Amy cooked for me Leonard, and between eating food that I have no idea who has prepared and what their hygiene routines are and seeing a meal being prepared for me I will always choose the latter."

"Yes, and Sheldon's steady diet of take out food is doing nothing for his efforts of preserving his body as long as possible."

"How was I supposed to know that?"

"If you had ever attempted to cook for me then you would know that Leonard."

"Whatever, I am going to go eat in my room."

"Now, now Leonard you are welcome to join us and eat your sodium filled meal with us." Amy says.

"No I am good thanks." Leonard says retreating back to his bedroom.

"My he certainly is being mighty churlish today." Amy remarks to Leonard's retreating back

"Churlish what an excellent word choice, we should make that our word of the day." Sheldon says taking a bite of his food

"Agreed."

Leonard must have fallen asleep after eating his dinner because he wakes up around ten o clock to a strange noise. It is a funny squeaking noise then he hears giggles and he freezes.

"Please do not let that be what I think it is!" Leonard moans under his breath but then he hears:

"Sheldon! stop! Leonard might be able to hear us!" followed by more giggles. It is off putting hearing Amy giggle like that he never took her as much as a giggler.

"Leonard sleeps like the dead nothing can rouse that man from a deep sleep believe me I have tried .Even if he can hear us I have had to put up with a cacophony of sounds emanating from his bedroom over the years."

"Yes but in difference to his current situation maybe we should make an effort to keep the volume of our happiness to a minimum."

"We should, but can you when I do this?" Leonard does not want to know what he does but it makes Amy squeal with delight. That is just too much for him to handle right now and he raps on his bedroom wall.

"For the record, I am awake, and I can hear you!" Leonard calls through the wall. They stop and it grows silent he starts feeling bad immediately. There is no telling what they were doing in there for all he knew they could have been jumping on the bed. He is thinking about knocking again to apologize so they can bet back to whatever they were doing when he hears a knock at his bedroom door.

"Come in."Leonard is ready to apologize before Sheldon can launch into a diatribe about all he has endured throughout the years. When Amy opens the door wearing Sheldon's robe. She tosses Sheldon's noise canceling headphones on his bed.

" Sheldon says you can borrow these but please disinfect them properly before returning them to him. He would of come himself but he is otherwise engaged at the moment." she clears her throat as she says that and then disappears. Leonard lays the headphones on his bedside table. He closes his eyes and lays quiet in bed trying to process all that is going on and having a hard time. Just as he starts to doze off the giggling and squeaking begins again and he puts the headphones on a puts a pillow over his head.

He does not get good sleep and is grumpy in the morning when he wakes up. Amy and Sheldon are already in the kitchen eating breakfast .

"Good Morning Leonard!" Sheldon greets him enthusiastically "Did you sleep well?"

"No, and you know why."

"I made coffee Leonard," Amy says pointing to the pot.

"I did not know you drank coffee."

"I don't , I made it to be polite to you."

"Well thank you." Leonard's mood improves slightly as he drinks a cup.

"Now,Leonard we never got to discuss our bathroom and shower arrangements now that their is an extra person in the apartment. I meant to hammer it all out last night but you ran away. Now this morning I used the idea that I got from you when you were dating Priya and showered with Amy. It saved time and water but it proved much to distracting to be used everyday."

"I cannot talk about this right now." Leonard says draining his cup"I am going to go get ready for work."

"It is OK Sheldon, he is being impossible, I will just get up an extra thirty minutes early and go before your normal time."

"Thank you Amy at least someone in this apartment is being reasonable.

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	5. Niggling Doubts

"Leonard I need you to take me home." Sheldon says appearing at Leonard's lab door.

"Why can't Amy do it?" they had been all living together for three weeks and Amy had been doing the bulk of the Sheldon transportation duties. There had been some discussion in the beginning about them all carpooling together but the idea of being stuck in the car with the happy couple as they played counterfactuals did not appeal to Leonard. Plus since he had been driving in alone he had been able to listen to the radio, he missed music.

"Amy is working late on her project, she is this close to a breakthrough." He indicates an inch with his thumb and index finger.

"Well I am not going straight home, I am going to Howard and Bernadettes for dinner."

"OK, I can come along Amy said I would have to responsible for for my own dinner tonight anyway, so two birds."

"Fine let me just text Howard and tell him you are coming too." Leonard us actually a little excited about spending some time with Sheldon away from Amy. He kind of missed his best friend and ever since Amy had moved in Sheldon's attention had been elsewhere. At first it was nice not to have to cater to all his needs, but with Penny gone it felt good to be needed.

In the car Leonard's radio is still on and his blaring music as soon as he starts the car up.

"Good God! Leonard! what is that horrible caterwauling? Turn it off!"

"Oh sorry, I forgot, since you have been riding with Amy I have been able to listen to music."

"Music is one thing,that was two cats in heat duking it out in a back alley. I will have you know Amy and I listen to music in the car too."

"Excuse me? I drove you to work everyday for eight years and you never once let me listen to the radio."

"Well at first I was opposed to it but then Amy suggested that we conduct an experiment. We started playing classical music in the car on alternate days. I found on days where music was played provided that it had no lyrics and was calming in nature my mood was improved "

"Wonderful."

"It is! I really like driving with Amy, she loves playing car games and she has never once suggested we play the quiet game like you used to. I think Amy might know just as many interesting facts as I do."

"She is a wealth of knowledge." Leonard says sarcastically

"She is!" Sheldon agrees.

At Howard and Bernadette's apartment Sheldon eats the meal Bernadette has prepared without complaint or comment.

"Sheldon I was surprised that you came over for dinner tonight I thought it was pizza night." Bernadette asks him.

"Oh, not any more, now that Amy lives with me she cooks for me and I find I like that better. So whether you cook for me or she does I figure it is the same."

"That is very mature of you."

"Thank you, I have been working on that." then his phone dings and he looks at it. "That is Amy, she is down stairs waiting to pick me up. She sends her apologies that she will not be able to come up but a monkey threw poo at her and she needs a shower." Sheldon stands and starts gathering his things.

"You know I could have taken you home Sheldon, Amy could have just gone home."

"Yes, but I sense by conversational tone that you want to stay and chat awhile, I do not like chatting, I want to go home, so I texted Amy to come get me as soon as she left work."

" Fine, see you later then." Leonard says aggravated

"Say hello to Amy for me." Bernadette says

"Tell her I am sorry a monkey flung poo at her for me." Raj says

"Will do, well goodbye everyone and thank you for dinner." Sheldon leaves and everyone else sits around the couch.

"So how is it living full time with the Shamy?" Howard asks

"Lovely just fricking perfect! You know he is not kidding about not liking to chat, last Saturday I do not think that he and Amy spoke for hours. But not in an uncomfortable mad at each other way more of a there is no need for words way."

"Maybe their giant brains have learned to communicate telepathically." Raj says

"You joke but I swear that I think that is a possibility. They were sitting on the couch both reading different books when suddenly they switched books laughed and then switched back without saying a word. Then later Amy got up brought him juice and some cookies and then sat back down. It was like he asked her to do it but I did not hear a thing."

"I think it is sweet, they are soul mates." Bernadette says

"Except Sheldon does not believe in souls, they are like some crazy science experiment in brain wave synchronicity." Leonard says sounding bitter.

"You should be happy for him, it seems like he has grown up a lot lately. Besides living with them can not be that bad I mean you put up with him alone for years isn't easier now that he has a friend to play with?" Howard asks

"You would think that would be true but she just seems to amplify all the things that are annoying about him. You know how he is always trying to bring up crazy little known facts as dinner conversation, and we always shoot him down? Well she loves his crazy little facts and asks him to elaborate and they end up going on for hours about it."

"So first they do not talk enough and now they talk to much?" Raj asks

"I mean it does not sound that bad really, Sheldon had to make lots of adjustments when Penny started living with you guys. I am sure he finds it just as annoying to hear about TMZ and shoes as you do about whatever they talk about." Bernadette reasons.

"I mean the poor guy had to buy noise canceling head phones when you first got together with Penny." Howard points out.

"Oh yeah that is another thing Sheldon had to bequeath those to me for a couple weeks."

"What? Are you saying they are doing the deed on the regular?" Raj exclaims.

"That or they enjoy jumping on the bed and having spirited pillow fights that conclude in him shouting 'Odin's beard Amy that was fascinating!'"

"Actually knowing Sheldon for as long as I have that seems the only logical conclusion to come to." Howard says.

"Yeah I thought that too until Amy brought me the headphones wearing only Sheldon's robe. The guys wrinkle up their noses at the thought never having thought of Amy as being a sexual creature.

" I still do not see the problem, I think it is you that is the problem and not them. I honestly have not heard a single thing that makes me think they are being as terrible as you are making them out to be. Bernadette says defending her friend. She has talked to Amy and knows how happy she is right now. "From the way Amy tells it you are being the awful one."

"How is that?"

"She says you have been surly towards her, you are constantly complaining about everything, you embarrassed her by knocking on the wall and pointing out you could hear them. Do you know how long she has been waiting for this Leonard?"

"Not as long as I have been waiting to live with Penny!" and there it was the truth. It was not that Sheldon and Amy were being awful it was that he was so annoyed at what they had. It was supposed the to be his time to be happy. When would it be Leonard's turn? He had waited patiently for years for Penny to come around and when she finally does she has to go away. Sheldon had not even wanted what he had and yet he had gotten it so easily.

"I am sorry Leonard but you know Penny is coming back soon." Bernadette pats Leonard reassuringly on the back.

He says his goodbyes and drives home he misses Penny and calls her in the car. The call does nothing to make him feel better, she sounds distracted and talks all about the movie nonstop. The conversation is very one sided and when he hangs up he thinks about another thing that has been bothering him since he had been living with Sheldon and Amy.

Their relationship that he had always been so dismissive of was stronger than the one he had with Penny. No they were not engaged but they might as well be married for as in tune to each other they were. They had everything in common , they were in equal footing in the relationship. No matter how disinterested Sheldon had acted of Amy in the beginning it was clear now that it had been a front. Sheldon was crazy about Amy and she was just the same about him. Leonard however would never shake the feeling that he loved Penny more than she loved him. It worried him to think that someday she might find some one else, someone she found more handsome, that made more money, that enjoyed the same things that she did and leave him. Penny's departure to Georgia had not helped assuage this niggling doubt's that he had. He wanted her to come back so bad so at least they could be together and her proximity would be enough to soothe him.


	6. Tea and conversation

**Thank you so much for all your feedback, I hope you like this chapter**.

Amy sits on the kitchen stool drinking her tea, it is early Saturday morning. Sheldon sleeps in a little on Saturday but she has been up for a while. As much as she loves living with Sheldon she also enjoys these quiet times by herself in the morning. After living alone for so long it is hard getting used to having someone around all the time.

Amy uses the time to think about all that has changed and how content she is. She thinks about how she loves waking up and finding Sheldon's hand wrapped around her waist how perfectly his long fingers fit inside that little dip of her body. How cute it is no matter how he falls asleep he always wakes up with his hand in that little hollow.

"Good Morning" Leonard says walking up behind her ,she is so lost in thought that she does not see Leonard behind her .Amy squeals and drops her tea.

"A little jumpy are we?" Leonard asks.

"You just startled me is all, you are up awfully early." Amy feels uneasy being alone with Leonard. He has not exactly been welcoming to her since she moved in. It was not Amy's fault that his well laid plans had gone awry.

"I could not sleep."

"Are you experiencing insomnia or emotional turmoil?" Amy asks cleaning up the spilt tea and putting her cup in the sink.

"A little bit of both actually." Leonard says preparing a pot of coffee.

" Anything you would like to talk about sometimes an sympathetic ear to talk to helps. "

"Would you mind? Sheldon hates hearing about my personal problem's."

"No not at all, please the floor is yours, consider me the friendly local barkeep ready to listen too your tale of woe"

"OK you might not have noticed but I have been a little surly to you since you moved in."

"Oh, I have noticed but please continue."

"I feel bad about that so let me first take this opportunity to apologize."

"Apology accepted."

"I think I have been upset because, all this, what you and Sheldon are doing, is supposed to be me right now. I was the one who was finally moving on, I was supposed to be living in domesticated bliss with my significant other and instead I am the room mate again."

"But that is only temporary , Penny will be back in a few weeks."

"I know, and I guess I was also a little upset that my best friend did not even bother to tell me of this major event in his life until a week before it happened. He only told me then because I had to stay, when would I have found out otherwise?"

"You know how Sheldon is, he is a very private person. I wanted to tell everyone the day he asked me to move in with him. Yet in order for him to feel comfortable he made me sign a non disclosure agreement. Sheldon did not want people prying into our personal lives asking questions he did not feel comfortable answering. There is a side of him that not many others get to see. You know I am surprised you did not know or at least suspect something have been training for this for four months."

"Training? For four months?"

"Yes, starting a couple months ago he would sneak me in after everyone had gone to bed and test how he felt about sharing a bed with me. Then I would sneak out in the morning before anyone noticed me. You actually almost walked right into me once coming back from the bathroom but you did not have your glasses on and I have life times worth of practice pretending to be invisible."

"May I ask you how he asked you to move in with him? He always seemed so against it that is a real 180 for him."

"Oh you know, it was a careful discussion about how it would be beneficial for both of us in the long run." Amy hopes Leonard can not tell she is lying the real story is much saucier. It was after the second time they engaged in coitus, well second planned act of coitus third time over all and after achieving orgasm Sheldon had shouted "Amy move in with me!" she thought he might take it back afterwards but he was set on the idea from then on.

"Well I guess it does not surprise me, I thought it would take him a little longer to reach that conclusion but I knew he would do it, Sheldon is crazy about you I hope you know that."

"I do, and I feel the same way about him."

"That is the other thing that has been keeping me up at night. I am hopelessly in love with Penny. I have been for years, all I have ever wanted is her. Yet I sometimes feel she does not feel the same way about me."

"Why would you think that?"

"I don't know because she is beautiful and funny and I am well me…"

"Do not sell yourself short Leonard, you could very well flip the situation around and say You are brilliant physicist with a promising career what would you want with an unemployed actress. Penny is one of my best friends and I know for a fact that she is crazy about you. "

"Thank you, Amy, you know this little chat has helped a lot."

Sheldon walks out of the bedroom and in to the kitchen.

"Good Morning, everyone is up early."

"I always wake up early, and Leonard was experiencing emotional turmoil." Amy says handing Sheldon a cup of tea

"You do not want to talk about it do you?" Sheldon asks Leonard exasperated "It is far to early for emotional turmoil."

"Do not worry I already talked to Amy about it and she really helped."

"Oh good! Just one more drop in the bucketful of why I love this little lady" Sheldon patting her on the bottom.

"Sheldon!" Amy laughs swatting his hand away playfully. "I am going to go take a shower."

When Amy gets out she sees she has a text from Bernadette, she wants to have a girls night. Amy texts back that a girls night sounds wonderful, it has been awhile Penny always arranged that kind of thing. Sheldon would not mind he probably would like to have a night to play video games or watch movies with the guys. Amy decided to check with him just in case he had something planned she does not know about.

Sheldon walks in the room after taking his shower just wearing a towel. Amy does not think she will ever get used to seeing him in a state of undress. If she had not already gotten dressed herself she might think about putting the moves on him. He probably would not go for it anyway, as far as he had come he was still a firm believer in a time and a place for everything. Hanky Panky during the day and while Leonard was awake would be a big no no for him.

"Sheldon, would you mind if I went out with Bernadette tonight? You and they guys could have a guys night."

"Why would I mind if you went out with Bernadette?"

"I did not think that you would but just in case you had other plans decided to ask you anyway."

"That is considerate of you, actually I was going to ask you if you minded if I hung out with the guys tonight instead of you."

"Not at all, what do you guys have planned."

"Oh, I thought we would go to Vegas and pick up some loose women."

"Sheldon!"

"Bazinga! You are the only loose woman for me you know that, I thought we might play dungeons and dragons."

Amy and Bernadette go out for dinner and then afterwards go back to Howards and Bernadette's for some wine and girl talk. It always makes Amy happy thinking about how just a couple years ago she would have been alone in a Saturday night and now she had a best friends and girls nights.

"So Amy how has it been living with Sheldon and Leonard?" Bernadette says thumbing through a magazine.

"With Sheldon wonderful with Leonard it has been a little rough, I get the feeling he does not like me some times. This morning though we had a nice conversation before Sheldon woke up. So I am hoping that some of the tension between us is broken for now."

"What did you talk about?"

"Leonard's crippling insecurities involving Penny." Just then Bernadette's eyes become wide as she looks at the magazine.

"Oh my god!" she whispers "Speaking of crippling insecurities"

"What?" Amy asks looking over at the magazine it is one of those glossy celebrity tabloids.

"You know how before Penny left she told us that this movie was not that big of a deal and no one important was going to be in it?"

"Yeah."

"Well that may not have been entirely true… look!" Bernadette holds up the magazine and shows Amy a picture. Amy reads the caption

"Simon Bancroft who is currently on location in Georgia filming his new movie cozies up to mystery blonde durning a break from filming." She does not know who Simon is but in the picture he has is arm wrapped around a girl and is whispering in her ear. The girl was no mystery girl though it was Penny.

"Poor Leonard! this is going to really hurt him." Bernadette says

"Well we do not know the whole story, it could be completely different than what it looks like." Amy reasons

"Or it could be exactly what it looks like. What are we going to do?"

"Try to keep Leonard from seeing this as long as possible and in the mean time try to contact Penny and ask her about it"


	7. Affairs of the Heart

The guys are all playing dungeons and dragons back at the apartment Howard is dungeon master again. Sheldon is glad that Howard volunteered for the duties. With all that is going on he did not want to hurt Leonard's already fragile feelings and tell him he preferred Howard.

"You enter the swamp of gloom where a nasty odor fills the air." Howard intones.

"Sheldon you should lead this mission" Raj says laughing

"I agree with you Raj but why are you laughing?" It baffles Sheldon how Raj can giggle like a school girl at the most banal topics.

"I heard that you and Amy have been doing the nasty! So nasty things are your new expertise!" Ray exclaims wiggling his pelvis, the rest of the gang burst out laughing

"I do not think that is any of your business." Sheldon says not looking at Raj It annoys him to no end the amount of teasing they subject him too. The tease him for not having sex, they tease him for having it What do they want from him?

"Come on Sheldon! you have to know that we would be curious, I mean most of us were under the assumption that you had the anatomy of a Ken doll. Then all of the sudden Leonard tells us things are getting pretty hot and heavy between you and Amy."Howard says

" What exactly have you been telling them Leonard?" Sheldon asks even more annoyed. That is exactly the reason he did not want Leonard living with him and Amy. What he had with Amy was private and special and he did not need Leonard blabbing the details of his personal life to everyone. As much as Leonard was his best friend he would be happy when he moved out.

"Nothing just that I had to borrow your headphones"Leonard says smirking at him.

"So tell us Sheldon are you actually doing it or are you and Amy just jumping up and down on the bed to piss Leonard off? Raj asks laughing

" A gentleman never kisses and tells. Now can we please get back to the game! Instead of sitting around gabbing like a bunch of old biddies playing bridge?"

"You never kiss! but let's get back to the game." Howard says picking up his notebook

"OK! I am beginning to think that you think I am sort of a joke! You want to know! Fine I will tell you! Amy and I are engaging in coitus we have done so 41 and a half times beginning October, 31st of last year. Also I think is pretty clear that I have always had genitals , how else would I urinate without them? Sheldon says angrily

"Ok, calm down! We were just giving you a hard time." Leonard says

"Yeah, sorry Sheldon let's get back to the game." Howard says

"What is a half time?" Raj asks confused

"Leonard came home early and in my nervousness at being discovered I was unable to reach completion." Sheldon says looking at Raj and Raj shakes his head comprehending.

They get back to the game and there is no other interruptions until Amy bursts through the door.

"Hello boys, do not let me interrupt your game." Amy says making a beeline for the bedroom.

"Did you and Bernadette have a good time?" Howards asks

"Yes, very nice! got to go! good night!" Amy says before shutting the bedroom door.

"Do you think she was acting strangely?" Sheldon asks

"No more than usual." Leonard says shrugging his shoulders.

They finish the game a couple of hours later and everyone leaves even Leonard who is going to Raj's wanting a break from the Shamy. Sheldon still has the impression that Amy was upset when she returned home. He makes her tea just in case it is something that he did. Although he can not imagine what that would be he asked if it would be OK to play the game. Maybe she retuned home earlier and heard him taking about their sex life with the guys he worries. When he enters the bedroom she is already in her night things and his reading a book.

"I made you tea" he announces setting the cup down on her night stand.

"How thoughtful, thank you very much" Amy says taking a grateful sip

"Amy are you upset about something?" he asks with trepidation

"Is it that obvious?"

"Not no obvious at all, the guys did not notice anything, honestly I am proud of myself for noticing."

"I am too."

"Is it anything I did?" Please do not let it be any thing I did he thinks.

"No." she sighs

"Do you want to talk about it?" Sheldon asks hoping the answer is no.

"Ordinarily Sheldon I can pick your brain for the answers to just about anything but I am afraid with affairs of the heart your knowledge and expertise come up short."

"I see" this makes Sheldon mad, he thought that concerning ",affairs of the heart" as she put it he was coming along quite nicely. He had after all declared his love for her, he kissed her ,in front of people no less , they had regular coitus. For the second time in one night he found himself wondering what exactly people wanted from him. Then she puts her hand on his arm and gives it a gentle squeeze, a gesture that not so long ago he would have found repellant but now sends tingles down his spine. With Amy the law of diminishing returns did not apply each touch meant more to him than the last.

"It is Leonard."Amy says and Sheldon gives her an angry look and Amy removes her hand

"I knew this would happen! Leonard missing Penny, you walking around in those nightgowns with all your sexed up pheromones flying around. Why does he always want what he can not have!"

"What are you talking about?" says Amy very confused

"Ever since you and Leonard's little tete a tete this morning I have been worried about it. He tried to put the moves on you didn't he? Emotional turmoil my foot more like turmoil down below! I am going to go and give him a piece of my mind." Sheldon moves to get up but Amy grabs his arm and pulls him back down.

"Sheldon! Leonard did not put the moves on me! You know I would never do that to you anyway!"

"I know you wouldn't it is in our relationship agreement, you can not be with another man, it is him that worries me!"

"This is what upset me." she reaches into her purse and pulls out the magazine and thumbs to the picture.

"Celebrity tabloids Amy? isn't your mind better than this?" He asks her eying the magazine in disgust

"It is, I just want you to look at one thing" she hands him the magazine and he eyes it warily as if she has just placed dead mouse in his hands. Amy taps on the picture with her index finger and Sheldon reads the caption.

"Amy! that is not a mystery blonde! that is Penny!" Sheldon says shocked

"I know" Amy says simply

"What are we going to do? This will crush the little guy!" Sheldon tosses the magazine aside.

"That is why I am upset, he was already worried about Penny not loving him this morning and now this?

"Did you try to call Penny and ask her about it?" Sheldon says

"It went straight to voicemail, she is probably still working." Amy says glumly

"No wonder you were reluctant to share this information with me. I am sorry now that I strong armed it out of you."

"As I said affairs of the heart are not your strong suit." Amy says resting her head against his shoulder. Sheldon tentatively strokes her hair and he notices that it is slightly damp. Some time during the last hour of dungeons and dragons she must of snuck out and took a shower. He makes him feel funny thinking about her being nude in such close proximity to the others. He reaches down to lift her face up and gives her a kiss she brushed her teeth too because her breath is fresh and minty. He deepens the kiss and for a moment forgets all the drama and it is just them as it should be. He breaks the kiss and gazes fondly down at her.

"I do not know I think I am beginning to understand some of the brains functions that are commonly mistaken as coming from the heart."

"Yes I agree with you there, but it still does not solve our Leonard dilemma."

"We do the only logical thing we can do."

"Tell Leonard and hope for the best?"

"Ignore him and hope the whole thing blows over."

"You are getting good at this." Amy says kissing him once more.


	8. What other choice?

**Thank you again for reading, your Comments mean so much to me. This chapter is short but hopefully it addresses some of the plot holes you were concerened about. **

Leonard was watching a movie at Raj's house when his phone rings it is Penny and he answers it excited

"Hey!I was just thinking about you!I am at Raj's house say Hi to Penny Raj" he exclaims into the phone

"Hi Penny!" Raj yells

"Have you seen it yet?" Penny says seriously

"Seen what?" Leonard asks the excitement leaking out of his voice

"If you can say that you have not seen it let me send you a link hold on. Keep in mind my agent just just told me about this a couple days ago."

His phone dings he opens up a email from Penny and sees the photo.

"What exactly am I seeing here Penny?" Leonard asks rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"What?" Raj whispers and Leonard shows him the picture and Raj covers his mouth in surprise.

"I did not think the photo would get published! The guy is some sort of reality TV star that even I had never heard of and this movie is his big break. I would have called you earlier but I have literally been covered in buckets of blood for two days!"

"Are you seeing him?"

"No! Leonard you know I love you with all my heart! The whole cast went out to some bar after shooting was done for the day and had a few drinks."

"Oh that makes me feel so much better that you were drinking!" Leonard says sarcastically

"Let me finish! One of his fans saw him and asked to take the picture FYI he is whispering maybe you and me and that girl could have a threesome into my ear and right afterwards I punch him in the throat but that picture did not get published!"

"You punched him?"

"Right in the throat! I swear Leonard please do not be mad at me!"

"I am not mad, I love you and more than that I trust you if you say there is nothing going on I believe you."

"Thank you! You really are the best guy in the whole world!"

"I know, I am great, and being so great I am going to look on the bright side, at least you got your picture in a magazine! Everything is coming up Penny!"

"Hey maybe with some luck and this movie takes off they will have a picture of me and you and it will day Penny Hofstadter and mystery scientist."

"We can only hope!"

"OK I have got to go we are filming a night scene and I have to wake up at like four in the morning to shoot it. I love you so much and thank you so much for being so understanding!"

"Love you too bye Penny."

"Bye Penny!" Raj calls into the phone! After he hangs up Raj looks at Leonard

"Do you believe her?" Raj asks him

"What other choice do I have?"


	9. Fizzy Orange Juice Ramificatiions

When Leonard returns home he hopes that Amy and Sheldon are asleep. He goes too his room and finds that the next room is quiet and he is thankful. He does not know how much of the happy couple he can take right now. He believes Penny he does she at least told him first instead of letting him discover it on his own. Still the picture stung, no matter how innocent it was or how she had punched him afterwards the picture was out there. Maybe he would talk to Amy about it in the morning she had made him feel better this morning, surely she could give him some insight. Leonard falls into a fitful sleep and sleeps in late into the morning. By the time he wakes up Sheldon and Amy are already dressed and are sitting on the couch talking, but it does not sound like English that they are speaking. It is not unheard of for Sheldon to try and master a new language when he was bored.

"Good Morning, learning a new language this morning?" Leonard asks pouring himself a bowl of cereal.

"No actually we are speaking in Op the language Amy made up." Sheldon tells him

"You two have your own secret language?" Leonard asks incredulously

"Technically no, It is the language that I made up as a child and I have made several attempts to teach it to Penny. Yet seeing as though Sheldon is the only other person who can speak it fluently then I guess you could say it is our language." Amy says

"Well let me try and decipher it, say what you just said and let me see if I understand." But Amy and Sheldon exchange looks and shake their heads.

"Leonard if we wanted you to understand then we would have said it in English not Op." Sheldon says condescendingly.

"Whatever! you two just continue your creepy little conversation and I am going back to my room." Leonard eats his breakfast in his room fuming. Just when he thinks they can not get any weirder they start their own language. Why would they not want him to understand what they are saying? Are they talking about him behind his back? Either that or they are having some sort of dirty talk sessions. It would not surprise him if it got Amy all riled up hearing Sheldon recite Chaucer in Op.

"That was close!" Sheldon whispers to Amy

"I know! and I am not opposed to teaching him Op someday. I think it would be a fun experiment like training one of my monkey's." Amy whispers back

"I do think it is going to be difficult avoiding him all day though, and I do not want to have to speak in Op all day long."

"Actually I was going to propose that we leave the apartment for awhile."

"And go where?" Sheldon asks

"Bernadette and Howard have invited us to have brunch with them."

"Brunch! you know I do not care for meals that are combined together, not brunch, or linner, or dinfast."

"What is dinfast?"

"One time Leonard tried to make me eat pancakes and sausage for dinner, breakfast for dinner, dinfast. Additionally I gave already eaten breakfast this morning another breakfast type meal would be redundant." Sheldon says shaking his head at the tomfoolery of it all.

"You do not have to get breakfast you can get a hamburger if you want, that is the point of brunch it is anything goes." Amy reasons

"Anything goes" He scoffs "I hate anything anything goes, only certain things should go at certain times and certain places."

"Fine, we can stay in the apartment with Leonard moping about and try not to tell him that his future is looking bleaker still." Amy says

"Alright let's go, between listening to Leonard whine or eat eggs at lunchtime I guess I will choose the latter."

"Great! now go change your shirt."

"Change my shirt! what is wrong with my shirt?"

"Nothing, I think a grown man in a Batman T-shirt is sexy but the place we are going is nice and it would be more appropriate if you wore a button down shirt and a tie."

"Button down shirt and a tie! I might as we'll be back in Texas my mother wrangling me into dress clothes and forcing me to sit through three hours of church."

"I'll put on the Star Trek uniform tonight if you go change your shirt right now." Sheldon stares at Amy for a minute and gulps his Adam's apple bobbing.

"Fine, I will change my shirt and eat brunch but I won't like it! and you have to let me wear my costume tonight too!"

"Yes Captain" Amy says winking at him

They meet Howard and Bernadette at the brunch place and get a table it is as awful as Sheldon suspected.

"I do not like this place" he complains

"What's wrong with it?" Bernadette asks

"Where do I start! it is hot, crowded, they serve drinks in mason jars!"

"What is wrong with that?" Howard asks

"Mason jars are for jams, jellies, and memaw's homemade pickles not beverages." Sheldon says picking up the glass and inspecting it.

"So drink your water out of a wine glass they have those on the table too." Amy says

"That is another thing I do not care for you are drinking your orange juice out of a wineglass but they brought my water in this jar. If there are two options available why won't they let you choose?"

"Here let's switch then I have not even taken a sip yet." Amy is really drinking a mimosa but hopes maybe if he drinks a little alcohol he will loosen up and stop him from being such a pain in the ass.

"No I will not take your drink but I think I will order one for myself." He signals for the waiter and orders what Amy has. " if this comes out in a mason jar I am leaving!"

They order their food and the rest of the meal goes smoothly. Sheldon likes his orange juice so much that he orders two more. Amy tries to stop him but Sheldon insists and the result is that he is quite drunk by the end of the meal. He drops a bite of his dessert on his shirt and it leaves a large blotch

"Amy made me wear this shirt." He says looking at the spot with interest

"You look very nice in it too." Bernadette says

"She had to bribe me to get me to wear it because today was Batman day and I already had on that shirt and now I will have to put on Mondays shirt when I get back home."

"Just put on the Batman one that you already wore when you get home." Howard says signalling for the check.

"Wear a shirt that I already wore! That's crazy talk, but Amy says since I wore this stupid shirt to brunch that we can put on our Star Trek outfits later so I do not know how much less longer I will will be wearing clothes anyway!"

"Sheldon! that's inappropriate to talk about with other people!" Amy scolds him and Bernadette and Howard exchange a grossed out look

"Speaking of inappropriate, Bernie showed me the picture of Penny in that magazine! what do you guys think about it" Howard asks

"I don't know, I do not think it would be like Penny to do something like that to Leonard, it must be a misunderstanding." Amy reasons

"Has anyone talked to Penny yet?"Bernadette asks

"No her phone is always off."

"Raj said she called Leonard when he was at his place and something big happened but then Emily called him on the other line and he hung up on me." Howard tells them

"What are we going to do?"

"It is not like Leonard is going to find the magazine himself, if we do not tell him then he never has to know right?" Howard says

"Excuse me!" Sheldon says and they all look at him "This is the best most fizzy orange juice that I have ever had!" he says taking one last sip from his drink.

"Time to get you home Mr." Amy says and she pays her part of the check and leads Sheldon to the car.

When they get home Leonard is sitting on the couch watching TV he looks up and nods at them. Amy is supporting Sheldon as they walk through the door.

"What's up with him?" Leonard asks her

"Too much orange juice at brunch" Amy says sitting Sheldon in his spot

"You got him to put on a tie and go to brunch? What kind of spell did you put on him?"

"Later Amy is going to dress up for me." Sheldon tells Leonard with a big wink.

"OK and with that I am going back to my room."

"Leonard wait! I have a secret to tell you! But Amy, Bernadette and Howard say we should not tell you so never mind."

"Amy what is he talking about?"

"Well I guess the cat is out of the bag! Let me show you." Amy gets the magazine from her room and shows Leonard the picture.

"Is that what all this is about? All the weirdness and Op speaking? I knew about this already Penny told me."

"She did? I have been trying to call her and ask her about it myself but her phone as been off. I am sorry Leonard I should have asked you about it. I just knew how much you missed her and how you were feeling insecure anyways. I care about you Leonard I just did not want to see you hurt."

"I wish you had just come to me with this I stead of everyone talking behind my back but I know your heart was in the right place."

"It was, maybe we can try and get along better, and you do not have to run to your bedroom every time we annoy you . Just tell us and we will try to stop."

"No, I will just try and not run away it is just hard for me to see you guys so happy when I miss Penny so much."

"May I interject something?" Sheldon asks

"Of course" they both say

"The fizzy orange juice is making my tummy hurt." and Sheldon gets up and races to the bathroom. They hear hiking vomiting loudly.

"Did you give him alcohol?" Leonard asks raising an eyebrow at Amy.

"Just a little, then he got out of hand, he was just being so obnoxious I thought a little champagne and orange juice would mellow him out."

"Sheldon is like a mogwai there are certain rules you must follow or he turns into a gremlin."

"More like he is a gremlin and in order to revert him back there are rules you must follow.""

"Either way rule number one is never give him alcohol, no matter how good of an idea it seems at the time."


	10. BoyfriendGirlfriend Sing Along

Things in the apartment have settled down and it has been a week since the picture incident and Leonard finds himself almost enjoying the company of Amy. She is much easier going than Sheldon and once you got used to her particular brand of dry humor she was very funny. Leonard walks into the apartment after work and finds Amy alone playing the harp.

"Is Sheldon here?"

"No, the model train store was having a sale so I dropped him off after work he says he will take the bus home."

"Is that Tonight Tonight by the Smashing Pumpkins you are playing?"

"Trying to at least." Amy sighs

"You know that is one of the few cool songs I can play on my cello. I leaned it to play at my 11th grade talent show."

"Really that is so cool!"

"Not really, even a hit rock song that already has violins in it, can't make a five foot high school junior playing the cello cool."

"Hey why don't you break out the cello and we can have a music night! Sheldon did agree that today would be anything can happen Thursday. Of course Sheldon wanted model trains and I wanted boyfriend/ girlfriend sing along. So we compromised and each did our own activities."

"You know that sounds fun, and I am not just saying that because I have nothing better to do." Leonard gets his cello out and he and Amy play the song together. They are having such a good time that they run through a couple of the other songs they both know. Sheldon walks through the door with a bag from the train store. He stops in his tracks and looks confused at them.

"What is going on here?" Sheldon asks

"We are playing music together! Leonard knows some of the same songs that I do!" Amy says excited

"Yeah we are thinking of starting a band, what do you think

of Smooth Science?" Leonard says

"I thought we agreed on Amy and the Nerds!" They both start laughing and Sheldon stares at them unsmiling.

"First of all a harp and a cello do not make a band at best you are a very tiny orchestra. Secondly Amy, I thought you wanted a boyfriend /girlfriend sing along tonight?"

"You did not want to do that, you wanted to go to the train store instead."

"Yes, but that does not mean you can have girlfriend/ boyfriend sing along with Leonard instead!"

"Oh, Sheldon don't be stupid, there is no reason to be jealous, come and join our band." Leonard says

"I do not have an instrument to play." Sheldon says sulking

"Hang on!" Amy says and she goes to the bedroom and retrieves his bongos ands them to Sheldon. "Now with percussion we really are a band."

"Alright I will play along but I still do not understand in what universe a harpist, a cellist, and a bongo player constitutes a band. Also if we are picking names for are little whatever this is may I propose Sheldon and the Sheldoneers?" Amy and Leonard give him a look "No OK how about Sheldon and the Nerds?" They look at him again and shake their heads "Fine Amy and the Nerds it is then"

Leonard and Amy start playing "Don't Stop Believing" on their instruments and Sheldon bangs along with his bongos. When Raj, Howard , and Bernadette walk through the door.

"This has to be the lamest rock band I have ever seen!" Howard exclaims

"That's what I told them! Then I became their drummer." Sheldon says tapping a beat out on his drums.

"We were just stopping anyways." Leonard says moving to put away his cello.

" Just when I thought we were finding our sound." Amy says

"We still on for dinner tonight." Raj asks

"Of course anything can happen Thursday right?" Leonard says gleefully

"Obviously that title has some truth to it tonight if this performance by the 4B Rockers is to be believed." Howard says

"The 4B Rockers that is a good one!" Sheldon says just then Leonard's computer dings indicating an incoming video chat. Leonard opens it up and it is Penny.

"Penny! You called at the best time everyone is here!" Everyone gathers around the computer and waves at her. Penny blows them all kisses and laughs.

"I am so glad that everyone is here because I have some great news! The filming on my movie ran ahead of schedule and I am coming home in three days!"

"That is great! I have missed you so much! This is the best anything can happen Thursday in a long time!"

"Anything can happen Thursday, I have missed them so much ! Oh My God do me a favor OK ? Go eat at The Cheesecake Factory and tell everyone that I am officially a movie star ! Say Penny has made it bitches!"

"Do we have to use the vulgar language?" Sheldon asks

"Who cares! Of course we will do that !" Bernadette tells her

"Thank you Bernadette! I can not wait to come home but I have to go now we are going to have a wrap party tonight!"

"Have Fun! I love you!" Leonard tells her

After they say goodbye to Penny they all head out to dinner, Leonard rides with Bernadette, Howard and Raj and Amy drives Sheldon. In the cat Sheldon is quiet and it starts to worry Amy.

"Penny for your thoughts?" she asks him

"That's just it Penny is on my mind, how ate we going to work the roommate agreement with yet another person there! I swear the apartment is turning into a hostel with all the comings and goings."

"I do agree that fitting Penny into the structure of our lives will be tricky. It was hard enough getting used to Leonard being around constantly I do enjoy Penny's company but all of us living together will be confusing at best."

"By my estimate there is still another two weeks before Leonard's new apartment will be ready. Maybe we should ask them to find other lodgings in the meantime. I find it hard enough sharing such closed quarters with you, add Penny and her tedious personal habits and I just may lose my mind!"

"Come now Sheldon, Leonard and Penny are respectively both of ours two best friends. It would highly rude of us to turn them out especially since Leonard has had to deal with us these last couple weeks."

"Deal with us! More like we had to deal with him and his constant moping about!"

"Exactly, our happy relationship has been a thorn in his side this entire time. Are we going to deny him his chance the chance to flaunt his in front of us? Let's look at this scientifically it could be an interesting social experiment."

"Alright, you are such a tease with all your brain studies, always making me want more."


	11. Penny in the mix

Leonard is waiting for Penny at the airport the others wanted to come but he told them no. The first time he sets eyes on her he wants it to be just them. He has no problem spotting her halo of blonde hair through the crowd. She spots him and runs over to him and gives him a giant hug and kiss.

"I have missed you so much ,you have no idea!" Leonard murmurs against her hair

"I missed you too! I can not wait for us to get home so I can show you how much I missed you!" This cools Leonard's passion momentarily

"About that… you do realize that we are going to be living with Sheldon AND Amy for the next two weeks."

"So, have Sheldon put on his noise canceling headphones and we will buy Amy a pair too." Penny tells him leading him out of the airport and to the car.

"Yeah, that may not work Sheldon had to loan those to me a couple of weeks ago."

"Why were he and Amy loudly debating some sort of science crap deep into the night?" Penny asks

"You know they share a bedroom right?" Leonard's says raising an eyebrow

"Yeah but I just figured they just shared the room and got bunk beds, or a trundle bed , or the slept in side by side twin beds like Bert and Ernie."

"See I did not really keep you up to speed with some recent developments since we had such little time to talk while you were away. You see it seems your little Sheldon has finally grown up."

"What exactly are you telling me Leonard?" Penny yells

"Sheldon and Amy have a physical relationship now, a very affectionate one from what I can hear through the bedroom wall, which is why he had to loan me the headphones." Penny stares at him open mouthed

"I know they kiss now, we all saw that first hand but why has no one told me about this! When did this start! How did this start?"

"Well no one knew until after you left to film your movie and you were so busy that the subject just did not come up. Apparently, according to Sheldon it has been going on since Halloween . As to how? I do not know and I do not want to know." Leonard answers her as they get into the car.

"Since Halloween? Why wouldn't Amy tell me! She texts me every detail of her life including what color her pee was but I finally got laid is not one of them?"

"Sheldon made her sign a non disclosure agreement, now can we please stop talking about this! I have been missing you for six weeks, the last think I want to think about is the details of Sheldon's sex life."

"Sheldon's sex life that is a phrase that is going to take some getting used too! Alright, alright! You are right thinking about those two doesn't exactly put you in the mood. So what are the plans for tonight then?"

"Well everyone else is just as excited as me to see you, so I thought we might all meet apartment then go out for a meal at a nice fancy restaurant, then me and you could rent a hotel room and I can show you how much I have missed you." Penny nods her head thinking,

"Actually a hotel room does not hold as much allure for me right now. I have been living out of a hotel room for the past six weeks and I am anxious to sleep in my own bed."

"Whatever you want, is fine, I just thought you might want some alone time but if you would rather stay at the apartment that is what we will do."

"Awww sweety! I know you put a lot of thought into this but I really just want to be in my own bed tonight, besides they can not be that bad."

"Oh you would be surprised."

Back at the apartment Sheldon and Amy are sitting on the couch Sheldon is playing a video game and Amy is reading a book. Amy has been worrying about something for the last couple of days and has been scared to mention anything to him. The suspense finally gets the best of her and she just has to ask him.

"Sheldon if I ask you a question to you promise that you will not get mad?" Sheldon pauses the game and looks at her suspicious

"I can promise to listen to your question with an open mind." he says

"You know Penny will be living with us for the next couple of weeks"

"Yes, that is not a question that is a statement."

"That was not the question, the question is have you ever been attracted to Penny? Do you think of her that way?"

"Amy you know the answer to that, I am not going to dignify that with a response." Sheldon says unpausing the game.

"You think I know that but I do not, Sheldon this last couple of weeks have been wonderful. I just get worried that I will not be enough for you anymore and you and Penny have always been so close I just worry there is something more than friendship sometimes." Sheldon pause the game again and looks at Amy.

"Amy, I have told you that before you, I had no interest in anyone romantically or otherwise. You woke something up deep inside me that I never knew was there. Yes, I am close with Penny but she is like a pet bird ,brightly colored, chatty and amusing but that is all. Further more it took a long time before I enjoyed Penny's company and could tolerate her personal habits. I knew I liked you from the moment I met you in that coffee shop Wolowitz and Raj forced me to go to."

"I know, it is just that how would anyone want me when she is around?"

Sheldon can not believe what he is hearing how. an Amy be so unsure of herself? How could he not know how deeply he feels for her. Why would he ever want a mind like Penny's over hers? He remembers the night she told him to say something from the heart and he quoted her Spiderman. She may not have taken him seriously because it we from a super hero movie but he had meant every word. He had watched that movie a hundred times before and never paid attention to the sentimental drivel in it but the last time he watched it he listened to the speech and thought about how much it reflected his feelings for her. He wishes he had his own words to tell her how much he cared. Words so grand that she would never question where his affections lay. Yet the words lay tangled up in his mind,a mind that can so easily make sense of numbers and the questions of the universe.

He puts down the controller and looks into her eyes willing his mouth to say the right words. Her eyes are so beautiful a mossy green filled with so much warmth and intelligence that they have ensnared him on multiple occasions. Her eyes look so sad right now and he does not want her to be sad, it is not fair for her to be sad, when things have been going so well. He feels the familiar tingle inside his body that usually accompanies him losing control and letting his instincts take over. In his rational mind he thinks how Leonard and Penny will be home soon, how kissing on the couch during the day is against his rules, yet his instincts take over and all he wants to do is kiss her. So he does softly at first and then deeper as he feels the tingles spread up through his stomach and all over his body. He pulls her into his lap and she wraps her arms around his neck running her delicate fingers through his hair. He runs his hands under her shirt desperate to feel her soft skin. At times like this he can not believe there was a point where he did not crave this.

Then he hears a throat clear from behind him and Amy looks up then scrambles off his lap. He turns his head and sees Leonard and Penny standing in the doorway. How embarrassing being caught with your proverbial pants down, the way things had escalated they were lucky they had not caught him with his actual pants down.

"Hey guys! I'm back!" Penny yells

"Hiya Bestie Amy." returns adjusting her clothing.

"Sorry to interrupt you guys, but I figured you would want to know I am home."

Sheldon sees the amused glint in her eyes and knows she is not sorry at all. She probably thinks this is the funniest thing ever. The great Sheldon Cooper who used to always espouse how unhygienic physical contact was, making out on the couch like some horn dog teenager. Penny would probably tease him about this forever. Then there was the other problem his stupid animal instincts now craved completion. Until he had had his way with Amy he would have a dull persistent ache deep inside. It made him uncomfortable, more than not being able to complete a series of three, more than an unsolved equation. Until he achieved satisfaction his mind would be useless fixated on the prize elsewhere. Yet with Penny now in the house seemed impossible, if she teased him about kissing Amy he did not want to think about what she would have to say about the other illicit activities he was involved in. He would just have to tell Leonard tonight after dinner that he needed to make other arrangements for tonight.

At the restaurant Penny catches every one up on what she has been up to in the last six weeks. Everyone has a lot of questions for her about what shooting a movie is like. Penny is happy to answer everyone's questions with all her friends always doing extraordinary things it feels good to be the one with something interesting to say. Leonard is in awe of her his soon to be wife is a beautiful movie star. Never in a million years did he think he would ever be so lucky.

"So Penny I have always been curious what does the fake blood taste like?" Raj asks her

"Well being covered in it for ten hours a day for days on end I can tell you I never want to taste it again!" Penny laughs

"Did you have your own trailer for between takes?" Bernadette asks

"No, that is for like big stars like Jennifer Aniston and people like that, there was a little trailer we could go to but we all had to share

" Was there free food? could you make crazy demands like you would only work if someone took all the pretzels out of the chex mix?" Raj asks

"Pretzels out of the chex mix? Out of all the crazy demands that is the one you would pick?" Howard scoffs

"Why is that weird? The pretzels take all the enjoyment out of the mix because you have to eat around them! What demands would you have?" Raj says

"Oh I do not know maybe an on call Swedish massage therapist."

"Howard!" Bernadette says waking him on the arm

"I never understood massage, paying someone to rub your body, that sounds like torture." Sheldon remarks

"Oh come on Sheldon surely with how far you have come you do not mind a little rubbing?" Penny says archly but Sheldon does not take the bait.

"It still sounds extremely distasteful no matter what progress I have made."

"Enough about me what has everyone else been up too? I felt like a bad friend but I really has no spare time on set to call you guys! I have missed your jibber jabber and antics."

Everyone catches Penny up on what they have been doing and they have a nice meal. They all pay their checks and say their goodbyes, Sheldon goes to Leonard and taps him on the shoulder.

"So you and Penny are probably going to get a hotel room tonight right, give her a proper welcome home." Sheldon winks at Leonard and he looks at Sheldon like he has gone crazy since when does he talk like that.

"Not that it is any of your business but no, I thought about it but Penny wanted to stay home she is sick of hotel rooms." Leonard says moving away

"Leonard you and Penny can not stay at the apartment tonight."

"What are you talking about? Why not?"

"I have needs , that I want Amy to attend to and it will be difficult knowing you are both in the next room."

"You have not had a problem with it the last couple of weeks!"

"Yes because after all the noises I had to endure with your bed fellows I thought you deserved it. Penny will tease me and I do not like being teased!"

"Sheldon, I have not seen my fiancee in six weeks and in those six weeks I have had to endure your new found sexual awakening! Why did you not put something in your stupid roommate agreement about how to proceed when we both had girls over?"

"At the time that seemed extremely unlikely to ever happen."

"But a zombie apocalypse was an all to real scenario!"

"At the time, yes"

"In am sorry Sheldon but you are just going to have to deal with it or go without." Leonard says walking away from him.

"What was that about" Penny asks him as she gets in the car

"Turns out he is to shy to have sex with Amy while you are in the next room he thinks you will tease him. He asked me if we would get a hotel room."

"Wow, that is a whole lot of information to process." Penny say puffing out her cheeks.

"Well, I told him no, this is my apartment too, well for a while longer at least."

"But I thought you wanted to get a hotel room? Maybe we should if he is that worried about it."

"No! now it is the principle of the thing! I have not seen you in six weeks and damn it my needs are more important than his right now!


	12. Talk about Prowess

**This chapter is a little more M rated tell me what you think**

The couples arrive separately to the apartment it is late and everyone is getting ready to go to bed. Penny and Amy both arrive at the bathroom at the same time to brush their teeth.

"Oh, go ahead Amy," Penny waves her ahead

"Are you vacating your bowels or bladder?" Amy asks her

"No, no vacating of anything, just going to brush my teeth then head to bed."

"Then I see no reason why me and my bestie/Roomie can not share the bathroom."

"Alright but isn't that against Sheldon's bathroom occupancy rule?"

"Recent events have caused Sheldon to amend the previous occupancy rule ." Amy says clearing her throat.

"Let's do this thing then." Amy and Penny walk into the bathroom Penny notices that a few changes in the bathroom that reflect Amy's moving in. There is a candle on the back of the toilet and the wash clothes are purple Amy's favorite color. Part of her thinks it is cute and part of her is annoyed. She had been with Leonard for years and Sheldon would have thrown a tantrum if she brought a candle in the bathroom.

"You want to hear something funny?" Penny asks Amy.

"What?"

"Sheldon asked Leonard to get a hotel room tonight because he was scared that I would make fun of him if I heard you two bumping uglies!"

"Would you make fun of him?"

"Of course! I mean how could I not?"

"I do not think that is funny , I think that is very pragmatic of Sheldon.

He is conflicted enough with the new terms of our intimacy he does not need you shaming him." Amy says glaring at Penny

"Come on! After the years of insults he has thrown at me over the years about my sex life don't you think he deserves it just a little?" Penny says wheedling

"You were extremely promiscuous he was just being blunt that is just his way of speaking." Amy says

"Who are you calling extremely promiscuous? and how is a few jokes shaming him? It is not like I am going pin a red letter to his shirt or something!"

"I am surprised you have read that book." Amy says

"Book? I was talking about the Emma Stone movie where she pretends to have sex with all those guys."

"Whatever, I am just saying you should not tease him, I mean I do not tease you about Leonard and his lack of sexual prowess."

"What lack of prowess are you speaking of exactly?"

"Oh come on you know." Amy says spitting out a mouth if toothpaste and winking at her

"I do not! and like Sheldon has any prowess at all! What do you two do get naked and lay on top off each other and hope something happens!" Penny says flossing her teeth.

"I am just saying try not to get jealous about what you hear through the paper thin walls of this apartment." Amy says gargling with mouthwash

"I will show you who has prowess!" Penny shouts then stomps out of the bathroom and grabs Leonard who is standing in the kitchen "Come on Leonard we are going to bed!" she says tugging Leonard towards their bedroom

"That's it!" Amy says stomping out of the bathroom and into the living room. She grabs Sheldon by the hand and tugs him up from his spot "Come on Sheldon we are going to bed!" Amy starts tugging Sheldon towards the bedroom.

The guys look at each other confused and shrug their shoulders as the girls drag them to their rooms. They open the doors and shove the guys in and stick their tounges out at each other before shutting the doors.

In Leonard and Penny's room Penny pushes Leonard down on to the bed. Penny climbs on top of him and staddles his lap kissing him deeply.

"Not that I am complaining" Leonard says between kisses "But you are being awfully aggressive tonight"

"What can I say, I missed you." Penny says tugging off his shirt and pushing him down on the bed and burying her face into his neck.

"Its just that, Amy was being awfully aggressive with Sheldon and you seemed to mirror her actions and I can not help but wonder if you two are trying to prove something."

"Do you really want to talk about them right now?" Penny asks pulling off her large night shirt revealing her naked body.

"Never mind forget I said anything!" Leonard says running his hands over her body and drinking her in.

"Oh and Leonard!" Penny says running her hands down his body

"Yeah?"

"You know how I always tell you that you are too loud during sex and you need to be quieter?"

"Yes?"

"Forget all off that!" Penny growls into his ear and Leonard shakes his head eagerly in assent.

In Sheldon and Amy's room Amy kisses Sheldon and he tentatively wraps his hands around her waist and kisses her back. Then he breaks the kiss and looks into her eyes.

"Amy you know that I want this, but I can not focus properly knowing what is going on next door. It feels like an orgy in here right now!"

"Sheldon just forget about them it is just us right now." Amy says kissing his neck and gently walking him to the bed.

"Amy, you know how I feel about that." he says as she gently pushes him down on the foot of his bed and nestles in between his legs.

"That you like it." Amy whispers into his ear then gently kissing her way back down again. They hear Penny and Leonard in the next room and Sheldon pushes her gently on her shoulders.

"Amy! we need to stop! "

"OK, I see you are too distracted right now to continue." Amy says resting her head on his chest and looking up at him. Sheldon looks down at her and wishes he could stop but he can't he tilts her chin upwards and kisses her deeply.

"Sheldon?" Amy asks murmuring against his lips

"Yes" he asks

"Can I try something?"

"What do you have in mind?" Sheldon asks kissing down her neck.

"Keep an open mind , OK? Originally I was only going to to try this if you ever mentioned leaving me but desperate times call for desperate measures." Amy says sliding down his body and finding her target.

"Amy , I do not think that is very hygienic!" Sheldon says panting as Amy starts her assault. Soon he is lost to sensation and could not stop even if he wanted to. Then Amy stops just short of him finding release.

"Oh God! Amy!" he cries out as he finds release and he is embarrassed because he knows he has screamed loudly. "You little vixen I think you need to be punished for that one!" His pupils are dilates dark with pleasure and his voice his husky. It gives Amy a heady feeling knowing how she can affect him.

"Punish me? How?" she's asks

"Take off your night gown." she obliges and stands before him "Now lay across my legs." he pats his legs and Amy climbs on the bed.

"You like spanking me don't you?" Amy says draping herself across his legs.

"Yes, very much"

"Did you like it this much the first time you did it?" Amy asks remembering the first time and how much she had liked it but you could never tell with Sheldon he was so adept at masking his emotions.

"Oh yes, it was very hard not to lose control, I thought about it a lot afterwards." Sheldon says rubbing her behind gently and sending tingles down her spine. Then he slaps her behind with a large crack and Amy cries out in surprise and pleasure. Sheldon repeats the motion in a series of three giving him great pleasure. Then just as suddenly as he started he flips her over laying her down on the bed to finally find his release.

In the next room Penny and Leonard have already finished and are laying in the after glow but their enjoyment is stifled by the noises in the next room.

"Amy was not lying when she said she would put his love of repetition to good use." Penny remarks

"Told you we should have got a hotel room." Leonard says drily

Reblog


	13. Nails and Conversation

The next day Penny invites Bernadette out to go get their nails done. She is still mad at Amy and does not want to speak to her. Bernadette has already talked to Amy on the phone and is eager to mend fences between her two best friends.

"Can you believe that she said Leonard lacked prowess! What does that even mean!" Penny says to Bernadette

"Well you complain about his lack of adventure in bed sometimes, maybe that is what she meant?" Bernadette says reasonably she does not like playing the middle man.

"I mean like she even knows anything! She has only been with Sheldon , I mean SHELDON! Like she knows anything about sex or love!"

"I don't know, I think they have a great love story."

"What are you talking about, it took him almost two years before he admit she was his girlfriend and then four years to even kiss her!" Penny says

"Exactly! isn't what Sheldon did for Amy what every girl wants?"

"Sheldon? What every girl wants? Go take a walk Bernadette the nail polish fumes are seeping into your brain!"

"Hear me out! Sheldon completely changed who he was just for Amy. I mean sure Leonard and Howard have made small changes for us but Sheldon changed his whole believe system just to be with Amy! Isn't that what every girl wants a guy to be so in love them they are willing to change everything they know just to be with them?"

"How did he change his whole believe system he is still just as much into science and comic books as ever." Penny snorts derisively

"Penny, how didn't he change, before he met Amy he had no interest in sex at all! It is not just he had such a long dry spell he gave up trying to have sex. Sheldon did not think like that at all before he met her. Amy is literally the only person, hell thing for that matter that he has ever been sexually attracted to. How is that not a love story!"

"I guess when you put it like that it is pretty amazing."

"Sheldon is thirty-four years old, that is not young it is not like some young kid who has never been with a girl before. At that age celibacy is a life choice and he changed that just for Amy."

"That is true, I mean we had to buy him a book meant for twelve year olds to explain sex to him .I wonder what made him change his mind?"

"We may never know." Bernadette says shrugging her shoulders "You should be gentler to Amy you know how she is sometimes. All this is new to her too, she was a virgin before Sheldon and she is the same age."

"She was really rude to me!"

"Yes she was wrong but she was just defending Sheldon, she has waited a long time for this. If she thought Sheldon would not want to be with her anymore because you teasing him don't you think she would be pretty upset?"

"Yeah, OK, I guess I can see her side of it but I am still mad at her!" Penny says admiring her nails.

"You can not stay mad at her forever, and for the time being you guys are roommates. Why don't we all go out tonight have a girls night and maybe you two can talk it out."

"I don't know, Leonard might have something planned ." Penny's phone rings with an incoming text she picks up her phone and sighs as she reads the message. "Never mind it appears that my fiancee is requesting permission to have a guys night at the apartment."

Bernadette's phone chimes too she picks it up and checks the message. "That is Howie requesting permission to have a guys night too. Now we really have to invite Amy out we can not leave her alone with the guys."

"Alright I will text her and see if she wants to meet us for dinner."

Amy meets them at the restaurant and she is feeling sheepish. Penny is her best friend and she does not want to be mad at each other any more. Already feeling isolated not being invited out with them earlier she decides to be the bigger person and apologize first.

"Penny let me just say I am sorry about my behavior last night. You are my friend and I should not have said what I said to you." Amy says looking at the ground

"Amy I am sorry too, I should not tease you or him, I was being insensitive let's just forget it happened."

"See that was not so hard was it!" Bernadette says

They sit down in the restaurant and order their food and a bottle of wine.

"Amy, I am still mad at you but for a different reason ." Penny says taking a sip of her wine.

"What did I do now?" she asks

"How about keeping it a secret for six months that you had lost your v-card!"

"Oh that, I wanted to tell you so bad, but Sheldon swore me to secrecy. I had to sign a non disclosure agreement the morning after it happened."

"Wow! sounds hot." Penny says taking a sip of her wine.

"Quite frankly, the first time was such a surprise to me that I thought for sure it was a fluke. Then he came to me the next day with a disclosure agreement and in it it stated that provided I remain tight lipped about our dalliances they would continue. I was so eager for them to continue I would have signed anything."

"Why did he not want anyone to know, and why does he not care now?" Bernadette asks her.

"I am not sure my best guess is that he thought the teasing he would receive at breaking his previously staunch anti-sex stance would be relentless." Amy says with a pointed look at Penny. "As to why he does not care now, I think he still cares very much ,but the cat is out of the bag so there is no going back."

"He did not seem to care last night." Penny remarks.

"You and Leonard did not seem to mind either, and he did mind very much, he wanted to stop but I was able to persuade him otherwise."

" Why don't we try a new topic." Bernadette says

"No, I will behave, I still have unanswered questions about this topic. Like how do you accidentally lose your virginity?"

"Oh the act itself was no accident, I was referring to the events leading up to the act."

"What do you mean?" Bernadette asks.

"Let me start with something happened almost a year ago now. Sheldon propositioned me on the night he decided to quit string theory and got drunk."

"What! I thought you guys just started doing it" Penny interrupts.

" Yes, I am not done, As I was saying, I was putting him to bed that night and he got completely nude got into bed and said "You can have your way with me now! Let's get this thing over with!"

"Oh my god!" Penny says

"I know, not exactly the way I always envisioned losing my flower."

"That sounds a little out of character for Sheldon." Bernadette says

"It was extremely ,so I politely declined his offer tucked him into bed and left . The next day he acted like it never happened. So I thought he was so drunk that he did not remember it."

"That is a funny story but how does that lead us to you losing your flower." Bernadette says

"On Halloween after the costume party he came back to my apartment for a little while. He was in a really good mood because he had won the couples costume contest. We started kissing a little on the couch something he has allowed since he came back from his train trip." Amy pauses and takes a sip of her wine

"Oooh that is news to me! I have only seen you to kiss twice once when he bought you the tiara and once at my party. He did not seem very into it that first time." Penny says

"Yes well public displays of affection are not something that Sheldon likes but I digress. As I was saying we were making out when he stops and says to me 'Amy do you remember the night I got drunk and asked you to have coitus with me?' I told him that I did and he asked 'Why did you say no? I thought that is what you wanted?' and I told him that I wanted to make love to him but I did not want it like that, I did not want him to be drunk and regret it in the morning."

"What did he say to that?" Bernadette asks

"He said I am not drunk now and I said " Are you saying you want to try to make love?" and he shook his head yes and the rest is history. "

"Do you think he planned it? I mean how did he come up with a nondisclosure agreement so fast?" Bernadette asks her

"No I think it was spontaneous, when I woke up in the morning he was not in the bed, I thought he had left. He was in the living room and he had been up for a while working on the agreement."

"It must have been hard to keep that a secret." Penny says.

"It was, I really wanted to talk to you guys about it, I had so many questions."

"Do you have any questions now?" Penny asks feeling tender towards her friend.

"None that I want answered in the middle of a crowded restaurant." Amy says.

"Speaking of that what do you guys want to do after dinner?" Bernadette asks.

"You know what would be fun? A sleepover we could have some girl talk and catch me up on some of my questions." Amy says

"Yes but I do not have my apartment anymore." Penny says

"Hey, wouldn't it be funny to crash the guys game night and have our sleepover there? They could play their game and we could play truth or dare and other sleep over games!" Bernadette says

"I was going to suggest your apartment Bernadette, but that idea sounds way better!" Amy says excited.


	14. Never have I ever

Back at the apartment Leonard is being mopey and it is starting to wear on the guys. He did not think Penny would agree to this guys night and he is upset that she did not get upset about it.

"I mean,she just got back and she doesn't want to hang out?" Leonard asks the guys

"If you did not want to have guys night why did you even ask her if it was OK?" Raj asks.

"I don't know! because I wanted to feel wanted! I wanted her to say 'Please Leonard I just got back let's do something together.' not 'Great was going to ask you if I could have a girls night anyway!'" Leonard says angrily

"Sounds like we are having girls night ! Are we going to talk about our feelings or are we going to play the game?" Sheldon asks picking up his controller.

"I mean she has not seen Bernadette and Amy for just as long she probably missed them too." Howard tells him

"Penny is not marrying Bernadette and I think she has seen and heard enough from Amy the last couple of days." Leonard says

"Oh are the cat claws coming out now that they have to share the apartment." Raj asks

"You could say that, they were fighting last night." Leonard tells him.

"Really? about what?" Raj asks

"Ba ba ba ba!" Sheldon interjects "That is not important! What is important is the game at hand, Gentlemen pick up your controllers and let us begin!"

"Now I really have to know! What were they fighting about? Was it something Sheldon did?" Raj asks

"You could say that." Leonard mumbles "I do not really want to talk about."

"Damn it! now I care! What did you do Sheldon that made them fight? Make Penny sign some sort of agreement, give Penny a strike? Did you check Penny out because you like that stuff now? I would not blame you if you did" Howard says and Sheldon cuts his eyes at him.

"I did nothing of the sort! I do not know how Leonard could say their little squabble was about me at all! Now please back to the game!"

"I could not agree more! Back to the game." Leonard says. Howard and Raj exchange looks with each other and shrug their shoulders.

The guys play the game for a couple of hours when the apartment door swings open and the girls march in wearing matching pajamas. The guys look up from their game in shock. Leonard is extremely happy to see Penny and is relieved by their interruption.

"Boys! We are crashing your game night and having a sleepover tonight in the apartment." Penny announces.

"I love the pajamas! I wish I had a pair!" Raj says the guys look at him and see that he is being genuine.

"Thank you Raj! The PJ's are Amy's idea! Bernadette says

" We knew you would say that so we bought you the boys version!" Amy says and Bernadette hands him a takes the pajamas out of the back and jumps up excitedly.

"Oh! I am so putting these on right now!" He says rushing to the bathroom to put on his pajamas.

"I bet you are pretty mad that we are crashing guys night aren't you?" Penny asks Leonard

"No not at all, I think it is great!" Leonard says

"Really I thought you would be annoyed."

"Why? I did not want to have guys night anyway, I thought you would not want me to go. I was mad that you were having a girls night." Penny walks over and gives him a big kiss.

"What do you think Howie?" Bernadette asks Howard

"I think it is great , let's have a pajama party! I have always wanted to see three girls have a pillow fight." Howard says wiggling his eyebrows.

"Excuse me? but no one asked me what I think!" Sheldon interjects "We were playing a game. A game that only accommodates four players what are we going to do with an extra three people?"

"Oh relax Sheldon." Penny says " We were going to let you play your stupid little game and we were going to do the slumber party stuff."

"Slumber party stuff? What kind of slumber party stuff?" Raj asks emerging from the bathroom in his pajamas.

"Wow Raj those pajamas look great on you." Howard says sarcastically taking in the lime green color and busy pattern of the outfit.

"I know! I look like a sultan in these! My culture did invent the pajama, you know." Raj says

"I thought we would drink wine and play truth or dare, or never have I ever, or who would you rather, maybe all three depending on how far one bottle of vodka and three bottles of wine takes us." Penny tells Raj

"Then count me in on the slumber party side!" Raj says

"Then that leaves us one player short! We can not play teams one player short!" Sheldon bemoans

"I brought travel twister." Amy says

"Twister! I love twister! You might not guess this about me but I am extremely flexible." Howard says

"He is telling the truth, he can almost get his leg around his head." Bernadette says

"All those years trying to perfect the art of self satisfaction really paid off!" Howard says and the girls give each other grossed out looks " but anyway I am now on team slumber party! " Howard says putting his controller down and crossing the room to join the girls.

"There was never any contest, I am going with the girls." Leonard says with his arm around Penny.

"A boy/girl slumber party! Almost twenty years later and my wishing well wish is answered!" Amy squeals.

Sheldon look's at the group and glares at them.

"Fine I will just play by myself then since my entire team has abandoned me!" Sheldon says still holding his controller. Sheldon goes to him and sits on the arm of the couch.

"Come now Sheldon , you can play that game any other time this could be a bonding exercise for you and your friend before Leonard moves out."

"Leonard and I are plenty bonded thank you very much!" Sheldon says stubbornly

"Then you could do it for me, it might be fun, you do not know until you try." Amy tells him

"Yes, you are right that sounds like fun. I want to drink fermented grape juice and be forced to cluck like a chicken during the intellectually stimulating game truth or dare." Sheldon says rolling his eyes.

"Fine play the game alone while I join the others in their party games perhaps we can invite Stuart over and all play a game of spin the bottle."

"What is spin the bottle?" Sheldon asks.

"It is where everyone sits in a circle and one person spins a bottle and whoever the bottle points at they have to kiss. Not that I ever got a chance to play the game myself." Howard says

"You wouldn't?" Sheldon asks Amy seriously and Amy just raises her eyebrows at him. "Fine, I will join your slumber party, but I have one question at what point during a slumber party do we all sleep?"

"Sweety at a good a slumber party you stay up all night long." Penny tells him.

"Then this seems to be a pretty poorly named party, it should be a no slumber party, or play goofy games all night party." Sheldon says snippy

"Alright let's get this goofy games all night party started!" Raj yells

"What do you want to play first? " Amy asks

"Open the wine bottle!" Penny says popping the cork out and pouring herself a glass. "I win!"

"How about never have I ever, I love that game!" Bernadette says

"Sounds great how do we play?" Leonard asks.

"You have never played it before?" Penny asks incredulously "Oh boy I am so going to lose this game!"

"The rules are simple everyone holds up ten fingers and we go around to each person and everyone has to say something they have never done. If you have done it you have to put down one finger the first person with all their fingers down has to take a shot." Bernadette explains

"So even if I lose, I win!" Penny says

"So let me get this right if the loser has all ten fingers down than the person whom has all ten fingers up shall be named the victor." Sheldon says

"Yeah I guess but it is highly unlikely that you will have all ten fingers up at the end of the game Sheldon." Penny says

"Oh I do not know about that, given the amount if experience you have and knowing you what is surely to be a game filled with vulgar topics I think I have the clear advantage. Sheldon says smugly

" Is that so? Then please allow me to go first, never have I ever …had sex with a girl!" Penny says

Sheldon glares at her and puts down one finger as to the rest of the guys. Shockingly Bernadette puts down a finger as well the only people with all ten fingers up are Amy and Penny.

"Bernadette!" Penny and Howard say shocked

"It was college everyone experiments a little in college!" Bernadette says

"Penny if you ever want to experiment with me so we can change our status as the only ones with our fingers up just let me know." Amy says winking at her

"Thanks Amy, but that will not be necessary." Penny tells her

"Fine, you think you have bested me do you? Well I still have nine fingers to go and they are not budging!"

"OK , my turn next !"Leonard says " Never have I ever labeled everything in the apartment with a label maker!"Everyone but Sheldon and Amy's fingers stay up.

"Oh! very funny Leonard! My turn next! " Never have I ever tried to tip a cow!" Only Penny's finger goes down. "Ha ha! one down nine to go!" Sheldon laughs.

"My turn!" Bernadette squeals

"I am a little scared about what is going to come out of her mouth." Howard whispers to Raj.

"Never have I ever been able reach the top cabinet in the kitchen without getting a stool!" Everyone but Bernadette's and Howards fingers go down.

"Nice one Bernie!" Howard says leaning in for a kiss

"That's not fair!" Sheldon yells "That is prejudice against tall people!"

"My turn!" Raj says "Never have I ever had a relationship last longer than six months! Boom all your fingers go down!"

"Oh Raj that's just sad!" Bernadette says

"Looks like you've got a the most fingers down Sheldon!" Penny says.

"Only because you guys are asking questions designed to make me lose!" Sheldon says indignantly

"You're up Amy." Penny says "Let's see if she asks a question designed to make you lose."

"Never have I ever gone into space!" Only Howards finger goes down.

"Hey why are you targeting my man?" Bernadette asks her.

"It is only fair since everyone else is targeting mine!" Amy says

"Target Leonard and leave mine alone!" she says angrily "Howard you're up.

"Never have I ever had sex on a boat." Bernadette's, Penny's and Raj,'s fingers go down and everyone else's stay up. Howard looks at Bernadette "It is like I do not even know you!"

"Hey I had a life before me met buddy!" Bernadette says to him.

"When did you get it on while on a boat Raj?" Howard asks

"I lost my virginity on a boat while I was still in India."

"My turn again!" Penny says " Never have I ever made out on a train!" Everyone but Penny and Leonard's fingers go down. "Whole hand down Sheldon!"

"I find it hard to believe with all your promiscuous ways that you have never been kissed on a train!" Sheldon yells at her

"Car, motorcycle, trolley, plane, and even once an airboat but weirdly enough never on a train." Penny retorts.

They play the game for a while til it is down to Sheldon and Penny each with only one finger up. It is Amy's turn to ask the question and Sheldon is sure he is going to win. Amy is feeling the pressure she knows that both her boyfriend and her best friend are competitive people.

"Never have I ever had a pet!" Everyone's fingers go down but hers.

"Amy I thought you were on my side!" Sheldon says

"I am ! You think domesticated animals are unhygienic! You are allergic to almost all forms of animal dander! I thought you never had a pet!"

"I had a family dog growing up in Texas and do you not remember my glaring of cats I briefly owned?"

"I panicked! I am sorry ,but I got Penny out as well!" Amy says

"Yeah! I am tied for loser with Penny!" Sheldon sniffs

"Technically there are not losers and winners in this game it is just for fun." Bernadette says.

"What fun is a game if there is not a clear winner?" Sheldon asks

"Whatever, drink your shot and shut up loser!" Penny says handing him a shot.

"Let's play a less competitive game next, how about Truth or Dare?" Bernadette says.

"Ohhh truth or dare this is getting interesting!" Raj days pouring himself a glass of wine.

"Since you lost the last game Sheldon you can go first in this game."

"So if I am given to understand the rules of the game is to embarrass your opponent by either asking a question designed to make them reveal personal information. Or make them perform a physical task that will humiliate them. "

"There are no opponents! but essentially yes that is the object of the game." Penny says

"Alright then, Leonard truth or dare?"

"I am going to play it safe here and say dare."

"Oh, Leonard you are playing right into my hands, I dare you to leave the The Stark sword by the door when you move out."

"That is not really what they mean when they say dare but fine, I was going to leave it anyway."

"Your turn now Leonard."

"Raj truth or dare?"

"I am going to go with truth."

"What profession would you have chosen if you had not become an astrophysicist?"

"Boring! Everyone knows that answer either party planner or hair dresser to the stars." Raj says

"Follow up question do you realize you would have made an excellent homosexual."

"That too I know, but I can not help it I love women! OK OK my turn! Amy truth or dare?"

"I too will go with truth this time."

"Are you sure because I have a really funny dare planned!"

"Truth."

"Alright, Amy what were you and Penny fighting about last night."

"Amy, you do not have to answer that, he is being blatantly nosy!" Sheldon says to her.

"No, I will answer, we had an argument about who had more expertise in the bedroom department Leonard or Sheldon. Penny continued to be angry with me when our bedroom session last night lasted longer than hers and Leonard's proving me the winner."

"Oh snap!" Raj says excited

"You were not the winner! Listen you two have been going at it for six months! I had not seen Leonard in six weeks!"

"Now now ,we agreed that we were both sorry and the fight was over. I was just answering Raj's question no reason to get all huffy!"

"Fine, your turn then Amy."

"Bernadette truth or dare?"

"Let's spice things up and say dare!"

"OK I dare you to stand on your head and recite pi to the tenth place!"

"Done!" Bernadette performs the feat with little problem and every body claps.

"My turn! Howard truth or dare!"

"Let's go with dare again!"

"I dare you to sing a karaoke duet with Amy!"

"Oh you think I would have a problem with that then you are wrong! Come on Amy your choice of song!"

"Summer Loving!" The two perform the song and take bows as they finish.

"I think it is my turn now! "Howard says out of breath " Sheldon truth or dare?"

"Pass."

"There are no passes! You have to at least chose one truth or dare!"

"Fine with Howard I will take my chances with truth."

"What made you change your mind? " Howard says raising his eyebrows.

"Change my mind about what?" Sheldon says stubbornly

"You know about what."

"I have no idea what you are talking about." Sheldon says feigning ignorance.

"You want me to be specific? What happened that made you the great Dr. Sheldon Cooper change his mind about being physical. I have known you for almost a decade and for almost a decade you gave acted like sex hell even touching humans was gross. What changed your mind about that?"

"I think the answer to that is quite obvious." Sheldon says derisively

"If it was then I would not of had to ask the question." Howard counters

"Amy happened, and I do not think I need to explain it more than that." Amy looks at him lovestruck and he looks back at her with equal admiration. He grabs her hand and gives it a gentle squeeze.

"Awww!" Penny and Bernadette say together.

"I think I am going to cry!" Raj says

"Enough of that! I believe it is my turn again!" Sheldon says looking away from Amy. "Penny truth or dare?"

"Pass!"

"No you said there are no passes!"

"Fine dare."

"I dare you to sing the Elements song!"

"I do not know it."

"I will teach it to you." Sheldon starts singing the song.

"Let me correct that, I do not know it and I do not want to know it."

"OK if you forfeit the dare, then you must answer the truth."

"Whatever, truth!"

" When do you believe that you will be ready to set a date and marry Leonard?"

"Sing me the song again?"

"Hold on, I am interested in the answer to that one." Leonard says.

"You know what? I am tired and I am going to bed goodnight!" Penny says getting up and storms into the bedroom. Leonard gets up and tries to follow her but she has locked the door.

"Well since Penny forfeits whose turn is it next?" Sheldon asks and the rest of the gang shake their heads at him.


	15. Truth and Consequences

Penny wakes up and is vaguely disoriented, this is not her bed Then she remembers this is her bed now she looks for Leonard and then remembers how she locked him out last night. Penny checks the clock almost ten o clock in the morning.

"God! I hope everyone is not still out there!" she moans

Screw Sheldon and his stupid question, who did he think he was asking that, why did he care? How could he know how hard she had been struggling with that very question for the last couple of weeks. She loved Leonard with all her heart and before she was cast in the movie she was almost ready to set a date. Then she got cast and went on location and it was so hard being away from Leonard, so hard to resist temptation. She had of course but not without some serious soul searching on her part.

This movie was just one small indie horror film and it had changed her life. What would happen if her career really took off and she was on location for months at a time? Could she put Leonard through that. Yet again what if that movie was it for her. She only got that role because the other girl had broke her leg. Then what her life be like, she would be Mrs. Dr. Leonard Hofstadter and that would be her entire identity. Leonard would trot her out at university functions as his beautiful trophy wife. Maybe she would pop out a couple of kids and lose her figure and Leonard would leave her for someone younger and prettier someday.

Maybe things were would be different if they were like Bernadette and Howard. They were on the same level if Howard left Bernadette she would do just fine. Hell ,probably better, Bernadette was better than Howard she had a doctorate degree, a fantastic job, and she was much cuter than he was. If Leonard left Penny she would become some bitter divorcée living off her alimony. Twenty years down the line she could be cast in the Real Housewives of Pasadena.

Hell, Penny thought even Sheldon and Amy have it easier. Penny never thought she would be jealous of their wack- job relationship. They were equals in every way they were just as smart as each other, as smart as Sheldon thinks he is Amy knows more. As crazy as Sheldon could get Amy could dish it right back out at him.

"Got to go face the music!" Penny said finally emerging from her room and finding the apartment blissfully empty.

"Thank God!" Penny moans and goes to take a shower. When she gets out she sees Leonard sitting on the couch. She approaches him with caution.

"I thought you were gone." she says

"I heard you stirring and left to get you this." he gestures to the table where there is a large coffee a giant bear claw and a bottle of aspirin.

"Why are you so amazing!" Penny says gratefully and sinks onto the couch with her coffee.

"I try, figured you might need it after last night." He says purposely. Here we go Penny thinks and she hopes it will not turn into a fight.

"Yeah wine at dinner and shots at the party not a good idea. Where is every one else?" she asks breezily

"Oh they all spent the night and then left in the morning to get breakfast. Party kind of stopped after you left though and we all went to sleep."

"Listen, Leonard I am sorry I reacted the way I did to Sheldon's question, I was drunk and I felt put on the spot."

"Penny don't even worry about it, I am not mad at you."

"You aren't?"

"No, you can take as much time as you want to set a date all that matters is that you are mine right now." Leonard reaches over and kisses her and they kiss for awhile.

"Hey Leonard" Penny says against his lips.

"Yes"

"Do you want to take this to the bedroom so I can add show you how sorry I am?" Leonard pops up and drags her to the bedroom. When they emerge a little while later Sheldon and Amy are sitting in the couch.

"Hey guys!" Leonard says to them with a big smile on his face.

"Hi! feeling better bestie?" Amy says with a wink

"I hope they are feeling better considering the way they both just broke one of the most important rules of the roommate agreement."

"What is that Sheldon !" Penny says suddenly very angry at him. He is the cause of all her problems last night and here he is causing problems again.

"Unattended food! You left almost an entire coffee and a pastry unattended on the coffee table! It is like you want us to get bugs!"

"You know what Sheldon I have a bone to pick with you too! May I speak with you privately?" Penny tells him. Sheldon looks to Amy and she nods her head encouragingly and motions him forward.

"Certainly, let us go into my bedroom so you can air your grievances." They walk into his bedroom and he shuts the door.

"So people are allowed in your bedroom now?" Penny says sarcastically.

"No, it still makes me uncomfortable but seeing as though you and Leonard just had coitus in yours I would feel more comfortable in here."

"Why? You have coitus now, what is the big deal!"

"Your sheets are sure to be disheveled and the urge to make the bed would overwhelm me making it impossible to focus on whatever you need to speak to me about."

"Fair enough, I am mad at you Sheldon!"

"That is obvious but I have no idea what about."

"You are my friend and you really put me on the spot last night! You could have asked me any other question and it would have been fine but No! You ask the one question that makes me freak out!"

"Sorry, but I thought the object of the game was to make the other person uncomfortable?"

"It is but that was none of your business! I have been struggling enough with it without bringing it to everybody's attention! Why do you want to know anyway! Why does that even matter to you?"

"It matters very much to me actually, it is a question I have been meaning to ask you for awhile now and I thought in a situation like that you would be forced to answer me."

"Why do you need an answer! How does it affect you in anyway? We are moving out soon, you and Amy will have the place to yourselves. When Leonard and I are getting married does not affect you in anyway!"

"I think I better show you how it affects me." Sheldon says walking to his desk and retrieving a key which he uses to unlock a secret compartment under the desk. He pulls out a tiny black box which he carries over to Penny. Sheldon opens the box and shows Penny the contents inside is a diamond ring.

"Holy crap on a cracker! Sheldon is that what I think it is?" Penny squeals.

"Shhhh! Keep it down! and if you think this is a diamond ring that I intend to use to procure Amy's hand in marriage then you would be right."

"It is beautiful!" Penny coos

"Yes, it was my Memaw's I asked her for it the last time I was in Texas."

"Sheldon that is wonderful! When are you going to ask her!"

"That is why I needed to know when you and Leonard intended to get married."

"I still don't get it."

"Social convention states that one must wait for one set of friends to get married before the next set can get engaged correct?" Sheldon asks.

"Where did you get that? No! You can march out there and ask her now if you wanted." Penny assures him.

"But won't it be weird if Amy and I get married first and you and Leonard got engaged first?"

"Maybe a little but there is not a rule against it! How long have you had this!"

"Well, I retrieved the ring while I was on my train trip, I wanted to ask her before we moved in together so we were not living in sin. "

"Well you can ask her now, I give you my blessing." Penny says giving him a hug.

"Penny? please keep this a secret, I want it to be special and if everyone knows then it will lose something."

"My lips are sealed!" Penny say making the zip motion to her lips


	16. Just like Mom's

Amy and Sheldon are eating lunch together at work in her lab. They would have joined the others in the cafeteria but Amy is close to a breakthrough and wants to spend as much time as possible in the lab.

"Sheldon! Did you hear what I just said?" Amy asks him annoyed

"Oh, what? I mean yes, very interesting." Sheldon says distracted

Amy sighs, actually she had made a very amusing observation, the kind Sheldon would normally laugh at and enjoy. He had been so distracted the last couple of days that it was starting to worry her. Amy was used to work consuming his mind and loved that part of him. The fact she was able to share any room inside his beautiful mind she was grateful for. The last couple of days had been different though usually when his mind was consumed with a problem there were signs. He would be filling up a white board then furiously erasing it only to start again. He would be scribbling equations and drawings on any scrap of paper he could get his hands on. Then most importantly he would be talking about it, she had once stayed awake with him all night as he talked out a problem. Amy did not mind she adored that even though she was not a physicist he trusted her opinions and input. Yet whatever it was that engrossed his mind currently he was remaining willfully silent about.

"Is there something bothering you?" Amy asks

"Yes, your research is fascinating" Sheldon mumbles

"Dr. Cooper!" Amy admonishes him.

"What did I say?" Sheldon asks surprised

"What is going on with you! Is there something wrong?" Amy asks.

"Nothing is the wrong with me, whatever gave you that idea?"

"You have been extremely distracted the last couple of days! Are you working on a problem ?"

"Yes! that's it my mind is preoccupied with the questions of the universe." Sheldon tells her

"What questions of the universe are you working on specifically?" Amy asks him

"Well look at the time." Sheldon says checking his watch "Lunch hour us over, got to go goodbye." Then he gets up forgetting the remnants of his lunch and walks out of the door. Amy stares after him wondering if it was something she said or did. It seemed to her that he had been acting oddly ever since he talked to Penny in their bedroom. Neither of them would say what they talked about other than they worked out their problems. Amy decides not to dwell on it and focus her mind on her work instead. Besides she has a surprise for Sheldon tonight that might snap him out of his stupor . Amy cleans up her lab and then gets to work.

Amy makes so much headway in her research that the time in the lab passes quickly. Before she knows it she hears the trade mark series of three knocks and her name. He opens the door without waiting for her to open it and peeks his head in.

"Are you ready to go?" he asks

"Nearly, let me finish up and I will be ready in about ten minutes." Amy says getting up from her microscope and getting ready to put her things away. Sheldon sits on a stool and watches her intently as she tidies up.

"I like not working in a lab, when I want to go home I can just leave without cleaning up." Sheldon remarks.

"You clean up, your office is spotless."

"Yes but, I don't have to do it."

"Well I am done now anyway let's go." Amy says gathering her things.

On the drive home Sheldon is being unusually quiet again, usually he talks so much on the ride home Amy tunes him out.

"I think you will like what I am preparing for dinner." She tells him and he looks at her and smiles. Her heart skips a little that it is his special smile the one only she gets to see.

"I am sure I will, you are proving to be an excellent cook." Amy blushes but is true. Amy loves to cook, when one lives alone for so long it is important to develop hobbies. Amy remembers all the lonely nights in her apartment watching the food network and then trying to recreate the recipes she saw just for one.

"I am making fried chicken, one of your favorites"

"I don't know, my mother makes excellent fried chicken it will be hard to compete." Sheldon says skeptical

"I may not make it as good as your mother does but I can at least try." Amy says hurt She went out and got all the ingredients special to make him this meal. Plus she has a secret about this meal she thinks he will like.

"Well I guess it does not hurt to try but I am telling you that the competition is pretty stiff." Sheldon sighs

The rest of the car ride is quiet and they walk up the stairs together in silence. The apartment is empty when they arrive Leonard is not home from work yet and Penny is nowhere to be seen. Amy goes into the bedroom and changes out of her work clothes before starting dinner. It is not very appetizing to cook dinner and smell like formaldehyde.

Sheldon is on his laptop when she emerges and she slips past him and starts working on dinner. Another surprise about this meal is this is is mothers recipe. Amy called her the other day and asked her for it, Mary happily gave it to her. The chicken had been soaking in buttermilk all night in the fridge. Amy fills the large frying pan with Crisco and let's it melt. She made homemade Mac and cheese last night while the guys were at the comic book store and she pops that in the oven. Then she breads the chicken and drops it in the frying pan she let's it brown before turning the heat down and popping the lid on. Amy is confident that she followed Mary's recipe exactly. While the chicken cooks she makes biscuits and Lima beans. That is it everything Mary told her was his favorite. Amy dusts the flour off her hands on her backside and jumps when she feels hands around her waist. She turns her head and sees Sheldon behind her the expression on his face unreadable.

"It smells really good" He comments as his hand gently stokes her side.

"I hope it tastes as good as it smells ,it is your mothers recipe." Amy tells him revealing the big surprise.

"How did you get that?" he asks her.

"Don't be angry with me, but I asked Leonard for her number the other day and called her and asked her for it. I know it is one of your favorites and I wanted to learn how to make it for you." Amy says gulping nervously she had been nervous about the big reveal worried Sheldon would think it was an invasion of privacy.

"Why would that make me angry? Amy is about to answer when Sheldon spins her around and kisses her. Amy is always amazed how one kiss from him can still make the world spin.

" What smells so good!" Penny calls opening the door to the apartment. Sheldon quickly removes his hands from her waist and steps away. Amy feels the sting of the sudden separation and turns around to busy herself with dinner.

"Amy is making fried chicken." Sheldon tells her happily

"Yum! I thought tonight was Thai food night though." Penny asks

"It was , I forgot you have been absent, you see now Amy cooks for me and I like that better." Sheldon explains

"Amy! I did not know you could cook! Sheldon you are getting an excellent wife! Smart, cute, and she can cook!" Penny says

Amy whips her head around did she just hear Penny correctly. Why would Penny say that? Penny knows Sheldon does not believe in the institution of marriage. Maybe she meant wife in the common law sense seeing that they lived together. Sheldon's head is turned to Penny and Amy wishes she could see his face.

"I mean if you were the type of man to take a wife Amy would be an excellent choice." Penny amends and Amy turns back around and checks on the food it is almost done. Leonard comes in the door shortly after Penny.

"Sorry I am late ,got stuck at the lab, Thank god you take him home now Amy! Sheldon would have never been able to sit still that long!"

Amy hates it when Leonard and Penny talk about Sheldon like he is a little boy. It was kind of creepy the kind of relationship those three had going on treating a grown man like a surrogate child. What wouldn't give to be able to monitor what went on in their brains. For now though Amy holds her tounge no need to start an argument when everyone was getting along finally.

"Amy made dinner! isn't that great!" Penny says

"Yeah, Amy has been cooking for us for the past couple of weeks. I have got to hand it to her she is a great cook. So what's on the menu tonight?"

"Amy made fried chicken and with any luck it will taste like my mom's." Sheldon says excited.

"It is done! So every sit down at the table and we will see how it turned out."

"Amy, let me help you it is the least I can do since you cooked. You guys sit down and we will bring you your plates." Penny say.

"Penny! All your training as a waitress is finally coming in to some use." Sheldon says.

"Keep it up and I drop your plate on the floor on purpose." Penny says pointing at Sheldon and he hush's

When the food is all served they dig in and everyone is silent while they eat. Amy is on pins and needles awaiting the verdict, to her it tastes really good. Amy knows Sheldon is not one to mince words and if he does not like it he will tell her honestly.

"Amy, this is honestly the best food I have had in a while! Dang girl you can cook!" Penny says

"It is really good Amy, thank you." Leonard says. "What do you think Sheldon?"

"It does not taste like my mom's." he says simply taking another bite.

Amy's stomach sinks she wanted so badly for him to like it, but he is still eating it so that is a good sign.

"I am sorry, Sheldon I thought I followed her recipe." Amy says a little crestfallen.

"This tastes better." Sheldon tells her and her stomach does a little flip fop. Better than his mother's was quite the compliment. "I don't know if I like that ." and the little flip flip becomes a lump.

Amy was used to it, she knew she should take what he said with a grain of salt. That Sheldon had no filter to what he said, that the spectrum of human emotion was a mystery to him. Still it was hard to remember that when he hurt her. Lashing out at him would do no good, he had no idea he had just said something hurtful yet just letting him trample her heart did not seem fair. Thankfully Penny came to her rescue.

"Sheldon! Amy worked hard on this meal that was not nice." Penny admonishes.

"What did I say? I told her it was better." Sheldon says confused.

"Yeah, but then you told her that you didn't like it."

"Why is being honest wrong? Amy told me it would taste like my mother's, it doesn't ,it tastes better, and that makes me uncomfortable."

"You know what? I am going to take a little after dinner walk!" Amy announces and gets up and leaves the table. She grabs her coat and marches down the stairs as fast as she can trying to blink back tears. Amy feels silly, why is she crying about this? Why should she be surprised that she went out of her way to do something for him and he did not care?

Amy walks down the street her thoughts swirling around her head. She wavers back and forth about why she is so upset and can not come up with a good explanation. Maybe it was Sheldon being so distant and distracted the last couple of days. Amy knows Sheldon has never been effusive with praise, she knows he more or less expects things to be done for him. Yet Amy feels she deserves some praise she wants to him to grateful for her and all that she does for him. Then she thinks about how much she loves him, about all the changes he has made just for her. Amy remembers the time not long after they started spending time together, the time she licked her thumb to remove jelly from his cheek. How he had reacted like she had burned him. Then how this morning she gave him a kiss on the cheek before leaving the car and he had smiled. Amy turns back around and heads back to the apartment the walk helped her clear her head and she feels much better.

When Amy returns to the apartment is empty she wonders where everyone went. Dinner is cleaned up and someone has even cleaned the kitchen. Amy would like to think they went out searching for her but in all likely hood they just went to the Comic book store. Amy decides that today has been emotionally exhausting enough and heads to bed. Amy lays in bed and reads a book, she tries to stay awake for when Sheldon comes back so she can say that she is sorry for storming out. Yet she feels her eyes get heavy and soon falls asleep


	17. The Better Half Solution

Sheldon stares after Amy as she walks out the door completely perplexed as to what he did wrong.

"Should I go after her?" he asks Penny

"No, give her some space let her cool down." Penny says getting up and gathering plates.

"I do not understand what upset her."

"Well she called your mother who she thinks does not approve of her so she could make you your favorite meal and you kind of shot her down."

"I did nothing of the sort, I praised her meal."

"Then told her you did not like it." Leonard corrects

"Come on let's clean up for her, she does not need to come home to a messy kitchen."

They move to clean up the kitchen and Sheldon and Penny do the dishes together. Leonard has already done his part and his working on his computer.

"So I have been thinking, when are you going to do it?" Penny asks him

"Do what?"

"Propose to Amy! Have you planned anything yet?" Penny hisses under her breath.

As a matter of fact how he was going to do it now that he had Penny's blessing to do so, had been occupying his mind. It was a question that he never thought he would be contemplating. Profuse declarations of feelings were not his forte. Should he do what Howard had done and wait til all his friends were gathered to ask her? Then again wasn't he better than Wolowitz? Perhaps he should present her with a grand gesture of some sort. Then again grand gestures were not exactly in his comfort zone either. All he knew was that he should not do what Leonard did and propose during coitus.

"I have been giving some thought but I have not decided on anything as of yet." Sheldon replies.

"You know what you should do you should take her back on the Napa Valley wine train and ask her"

"I did think of that but my love of trains as diminished somewhat." He says with a slight shudder.

"How about this! You fill the apartment with roses and spell out "will you marry me" with the petals!"

"No, Amy has an allergy to roses that little scenario would turn her into a sneezing sniveling mess." Sheldon says thoughtfully

"You could hire sky writers to write it over the skyline right at sunset." Penny says.

"Be serious! Besides why are you so intent on this lavish proposal? I don't remember you hiring sky writers when you asked Leonard!"

"Your right, but with Leonard and I it has always been this spur of the moment thing with no planning at all. Here's the thing though Amy has been waiting for this moment her entire life! You for whatever reason are the man of her dreams! I just want her to have the fairy tale proposal she deserves."

Sheldon sighs he hates to admit it but Penny is right. Sheldon looks at his watch and notices the time nearly a hour has past since Amy left. It worries him that she has been gone for so long.

"I am going to go try to find her, she has been gone far too long."

"Yeah she has been gone for awhile. I thought she would be back by now me and Leonard will go to we can split up and look."

The head out the door and when they exit the building they go separate ways. Sheldon heads west to check and see if her car is still parked where they left it when they came home from work. He sees the car and is satisfied that wherever she is she is on foot. The air is a little chilly and be tucks his hands into his jacket pocket. He feels the weight of the little black box inside. He tucked it in there this morning having the brief thought that proposing to her in the lab would be apropos. Sheldon knew that Amy found the story of Madam Curie and her husband Pierre to romantic .Then as he sat there eating lunch with her he completely panicked and could not think of the words to say to her that would be right.

Sheldon worried that be might never be able to find the words to express what she means to him. Memaw used to call his Pepaw her better half, the expression used to confuse him . Before Amy he thought he was pretty great all by himself. Then Amy came along and showed him sides of himself that he never thought possible. He used to scoff at the term soul mate. Assuming that souls were real finding your souls exact counterpart was statistically improbable. Yet Amy had given the term some validity, if he had a soul and it had a counterpart ,then Amy was certainly it. Sheldon thinks about when he asked his Memaw for the ring, and she said "Of course, Moonpie this little girl must be mighty special for you to ask." He replied she was extremely special. "Well Moonpie I think you finally found your better half."

Sheldon walks about two blocks checks the coffee shop she sometimes went to and see she is not there. He heads back to the apartment hoping that maybe he just missed her and she is back at home. He would never forgive himself if something bad had happened to her because of him.

Sheldon enters the apartment, Leonard and Penny are still gone. Sheldon walks into his bedroom and sees Amy is already asleep her glasses are still on and there is a book tucked under her arm. Sheldon has an urge to take her picture with his phone. He has a secret stash of photos of her in unguarded moments. He remembers the first time he did it ,he did not understand his actions . Why he felt the need to preserve the memory of her face on his computer when it was already stored in his mind. Yet he still took a screenshot of her laughing at something he had said and had the bizarre urge to look at it whenever he felt sad. Then he felt the urge to do it again when they were sitting on the couch together while she was reading a book. There was something regal about her profile that he admired. Something beguiling about the slight twist her lips took when something amused her. Sheldon had never been one to study faces usually looking at someone's face made him very uncomfortable. Not Amy's though he had studied its planes extensively, had mapped out what every expression meant.

Maybe not every expression, he had upset her tonight and was still not quite sure how. Penny had tried to explain it to him but he still did not understand what he had done wrong. He had told her that the food was good, he had really enjoyed the meal. Though billing it as his mothers was inaccurate it was better, and he had set his mind on it being an exact replica. It bothered him that someone had bested his mother at her best dish. It felt like an insult to his mother to think that Amy's was better.

Sheldon sits on the edge of the bed and gently removes her glasses and sets them on her night stand. He tries the ease the book out from under her without waking her up. Amy stirs and wakes up she looks at him sleepily.

"Is that you Sheldon?" she asks

"Yes." he thinks who else would it be? He forgives her for asking the obvious since she is in a sleep related sense of disorientation.

"Where did you go?" she asks

"I went out after I finished cleaning up the kitchen to try and find you I was concerned."Sheldon says.

" We must of just missed each other then. I am sorry about storming out like that." Amy says sitting up.

"It's OK." he knows from experience that Amy now expects an apology from him in return. He does not think he has anything to apologize for but then an idea hits him. Sheldon slides off the bed and gets on his knee. Amy looks at him with a soft expression on her face that he is not quite sure what it means.

"Sheldon you do not have to get on your knees and apologize I overreacted" Amy tells him grabbing her glasses off the night stand and putting them on.

"If you will notice, I am not in the standard begging for forgiveness pose which would be both knees down."

"No you are on one knee, is that the I will apologize but I do not think I have to pose?" Amy asks sarcastically.

"No, think about what else this pose signifies." Sheldon says fishing the box out of his pocket and holding it out to her. Amy covers her mouth with her hand.

"Sheldon is that what I think it is?" he opens up the box and takes out the ring.

"This is my Memaw's wedding ring that my Pepaw gave to her. Even after he died she wore this ring everyday. I loved my Pepaw and when he died I was very sad. After he died I would spend a lot of nights at my Memaw's house because we both missed him so much. Memaw would put me on her lap, and hers was the only lap I did not mind sitting in, and she would show me this ring. She said Moonpie someday when you find a girl you love as much as your Pepaw loved me you can give her this ring. I had not thought about in many years, never finding the need to seek out a mate. My Memaw, she used to call Pepaw her better half and I always thought both my halves were pretty great until I met you. You are the girl she spoke about all those years ago, Amy you are my better half."

Sheldon grabs her and slides the ring on her finger, to his surprise and delight it fits perfectly. He was afraid that he would have to get it sized before it fit properly. Amy looks down at her hand with tears in her eyes, happy tears he hopes and not sad tears please don't let them be sad tears he thinks.

"Sheldon." Amy says with a catch in her throat. "Are you asking me to marry you?"

Drat he thinks, he forgot the will you marry me part , that was the most important part.

"Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler will you marry me?" Sheldon looks up at her , and sees that she is shaking her head yes.

"Yes, , yes!" Amy whispers and she is smiling and crying and he is sure that they are happy tears.

"Sheldon? Amy?" they hear Leonard and Penny call. "Are you here?"

"Can I tell them?" Amy asks.

"Might as well Penny knows I was going to ask you anyway." Amy is already out of the door before he finishes his sentence.

"Sheldon just asked me to marry him!" he hears Amy yell then he hears a three high pitched squeals that most certainly includes Leonard.

"Fascinating." he says to himself as he heads out the door to join the celebration.


	18. The Tiara Reality

**(Authors Note)**

**Some of this is written in Kripke's voice but I did not write in his speech impairment. Partly becuase I did a draft of it and it looked dumb ,partly becuase my son has a speech impairment caused by autism and typing like that made me feel icky. Feel free to read it in your best Kripke voice though. Input is always appreciated.**

At work the next day Leonard breaks the good news to Howard and Raj. Sheldon has not arrived at the lunch table yet.

"This is unbelievable! I can not believe that Sheldon Cooper is going to be married before me!" Raj says shaking his head.

"He might be married before me, he his probably closer to setting a date than Penny is." Leonard sighs

Just then Kripke walks by and overhears there conversation.

"Did you just say Sheldon Cooper is getting married?" He says disbelieving

"Yeah, he asked his girlfriend last night and she said yes." Howard tells him.

Sheldon walks through the door without Amy holding his lunch tray. He sits down next to Leonard.

"Gentlemen, Kripke," he greets them with a nod.

"What's this I hear about you getting married Cooper?" Barry asks then not waiting for a response he says " Is it to an actual woman or are you getting married to a computer or an equation?" Sheldon looks at him with a scathing look.

"Kripke don't be ridiculous, you know my girlfriend now fiancée Amy, she works at the university."

"I know Amy, but I thought she was smart, too smart to marry a second rate physicist who still plays with toy trains."

"I am too smart to marry , a second rate physicist who torments his colleagues to make himself feel better about his mountain of insecurities." Amy says appearing behind Kripke.

"Ohhh burn she got you. Plus I don't play with toy trains anymore." Sheldon says

"Very good Cooper now you have your fiancee to fight your battles for you. I see who wears the pants in this relationship. "Kripke says pointing at Amy and walking away.

" You are wrong Kripke! Amy never wears pants! only skirts! I wear the pants!" Sheldon calls after him and Kripke waves dismissively at him before disappearing. "Why don't you ever wear pants?" Sheldon asks her curiously.

"My mother forbade it she said only loose women and feminists wore pants." Amy says sitting down at the table.

"What's wrong with feminists?" Leonard asks.

"In my opinion nothing, but my mother had some rather strong feelings on the subject."

"So Amy let's see the ring!" Raj says changing the subject Amy holds it her hand to Raj and he grabs it to examine the ring. " It is a little old fashioned but I love it!"

"I do to." Amy says removing her hand annoyed. "It looks old fashioned because it is, it was Sheldon's grandmother's."

"That is so romantic! So have you given any thought about the wedding? Because I would be happy to help you plan it!" Raj says.

"Raj is acting more like a girl about this then Penny did when she found out." Leonard whispers to Howard.

"That's because Raj is more of a girl then Penny!" Howard hisses back.

"No, I think a wedding is a little bit in the future still, all I know is I am going to wear my tiara that Sheldon bought me." Amy says.

"Really a tiara? That seems a little been there done that. Plus you already wore it to Bernadette's wedding. How about this a flower crown with gossamer ribbons flowing down your back?" Raj says emulating the motion of the ribbons with his hands.

"The tiara means a lot to me and I am wearing it! " Amy says snappily.

"Shesh someone's becoming a bridezilla already!" Raj says behind his hand to Howard and Howard just rolls his eyes.

That night after the big announcement the guys go out leaving Penny and Amy alone. Amy has been dying to talk to Penny about the proposal and the wedding, Bernadette is coming over soon. Penny looks at how happy Amy is and it makes her feel wonderful yet she is still worried too. Sheldon had made some huge changes the last couple of months, changes that went against everything she knew about was hard to believe that this was the same guy who used to make her sing soft kitty too him. Penny can't remember the last time he had her sing that and wonders briefly if Amy does it for him now.

Penny thinks it is funny how she kind of misses the old Sheldon. The Sheldon who was a huge pain in the ass who could not even touch another human being. This Sheldon who was getting married and having sex was becoming a little hard for her to process. What if he reverted back to his old ways Amy would be devastated then again if he was changing just for Amy that may not be healthy either. Penny tries to listen to all of Amy's happy chatter and participate but her heart is not in it.

"Penny, you and me should have a double wedding!" That breaks Penny from her reverie.

"No, I think Leonard is going to be to much a diva to share the spotlight on his big day." Penny says laughing it off.

"You are right, now that I think about it I want all the eyes on the spectacular vision that will be me ." Bernadette walks through the door and sits down next to Amy and gives her a hug.

"So let me see it! "Amy hold out her hand to Bernadette and they both squeal.

" I don't think I will ever get sick of doing that! "Amy says

" Tell me everything!" Bernadette says and Amy joyfully recounts the events of the previous evening.

"That is so sweet, I did not know Sheldon knew how to be sweet." Bernadette says

"You know what's sweet he has had that ring hidden in his desk for months but waited to ask because he thought me and Leonard would have to be married before he asked her!" Penny says.

"When did he tell you he was going to do it?" Bernadette asks.

"The night after the sleepover, I was yelling at him about asking about me and Leonard and he told me. I told him that there was no rule that says you can not ask your girlfriend to marry you before your best friend gets married."

"Then I have you to thank for him asking me!" Amy says

"No really you should thank Howard and Raj if they had not signed Sheldon up for online dating without him knowing. Then forced him to go out on a date with you none of this would be happening." Penny says her mood lightening.

"That is funny, I can not believe Sheldon thought he had to wait! If he had then Amy might be waiting forever for Sheldon to ask her." Bernadette says coyly.

"When are you going to marry Leonard? anytime in the near future?" Amy asks.

"I don't know, I keep thinking I am ready to set a date and then something happens and I am not so sure again. Leonard keeps suggesting these great dates and I just am not wild about any of them. Then once we set a date Leonard is going to go all crazy with planning the thing." Penny sighs.

"I know what you mean, Sheldon is in control of picking the wedding date and knowing him it will ten years from now." Amy says

"Sheldon is in control?" Bernadette asks.

"Yes shortly after we finished celebrating last night he made me sign a pre-pre-nuptial agreement. In it I give Sheldon complete control over time and location of the ceremony and he gives me control of decorations, attire, and I quote other girly junk."

"Sheldon has some control issues, don't you think? How many different agreements has he made you sign?" Bernadette asks.

"Yes he does, but I don't mind really he just has to think he has the control ,but then I can usually change his mind afterward. Our original relationship agreement had so many amendments added to it that the original document had to be nullified and redrawn." Amy says matter of factly.

"Really ?" Bernadette curiously.

"In the original document we could not hold hands, I could only spend the night if we were thrown into a state if natural disaster and I was already at the apartment. Obviously a lot has changed since we first entered into our relationship."

"Do you ever think maybe you are moving to fast? I mean Sheldon has changed so quickly don't you worry this might be to much for him?" Penny asks her voicing the concern that has been on her mind. Amy and Bernadette give her a look.

"I fail to see how getting married after dating for four years is moving too fast. I would say that is slow maybe medium pace." Amy says.

"I agree with Amy, Sheldon never does anything that he does not want to do. It may seem all of the sudden but I am sure he has been thinking about this for a long time."

"It is just, I don't know! This new Sheldon is so different from the one I know! I have known Sheldon for eight years and all this would have been unthinkable for him."

"People grow, they change." Bernadette reasons.

"In my experience they don't change that much." Penny sighs

"I am sorry Penny, but I am not going to let your negativity ruin this for me. I think you are mixing your situation with Leonard in with mine and Sheldon's. Please just let me have this moment to be happy about this there is going to be plenty of time down the road to worry." Amy tells her and Penny softens as much as she hates to admit it Amy is right.

"You are right! I am being a Debbie downer! let's plan this thing, hypothetically at least for now. So Amy are you going to wear the tiara Sheldon got you?"

"Of course I am going to wear the tiara! That is going to be my day to be a princess I am going to need a tiara!"


	19. The Couch Confliction

The big day had finally arrived the lady upstairs had moved out and Leonard and Penny were all set to move in.

"This going to be the easiest move I have ever made no need for a u-haul we just have to move walk it up one flight of stairs." Leonard says happily as he carries the first box up with Penny.

"I think you are forgetting that we still have to get the furniture out of my storage unit."

"Oh yeah, but it won't be that much most of the furniture from the apartment will be coming with me."

"Have you talked to Sheldon about that?" Penny asks.

"Not directly, but he should know all the apartment had in it when I moved in were two lawn chairs."

"So what are you expecting to take with us?"

"Well for starters, the table that we bought, my desk, my coffee table and the couch." Leonard says casually.

"Sheldon is not going to let you take the couch! That couch is his first love, I seriously question what he would choose if it came down between Amy and his spot."

"I bought that couch, he fought me tooth and nail over having it in the apartment it is my couch!"

"Why can't we just use my couch from my old apartment?"

"You mean that uncomfortable girly teal IKEA loveseat that even you did not like sitting on? Why can't Amy bring the couch from her old apartment she told me all of her stuff is in storage." Leonard says over his shoulder as he unlocks the door to their new apartment.

"Fine, let's go tell him we are taking his spot when we go back down. I am dying to see how that pans out." Penny says sitting the box she was carrying down in the entrance way. The apartment is a mirror image of the old one, only empty. "It looks so weird empty."

"The last time I saw it was when we helped that new girl move in here a couple of years ago."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about her." Penny says wrinkling her nose in disgust at the memory.

"I wonder whatever happened to her? It was an old lady living in here before us."

"Don't know, don't care." Penny says walking around the apartment "You know, we should get all new furniture. A complete fresh start, get something we both like."

"You do not like the couch in the apartment?" Leonard asks looking in the kitchen cabinets. "None of these shelves are labeled with what should be on them!" he says excited.

"Its not that I do not like it, it's just that it is such a man couch. If my old teal one was too girly then your old brown leather one is too manly. Maybe the solution is to buy one together that is somewhere in between."

"Let's think about it OK?"

Meanwhile back at the old apartment Sheldon and Amy are sitting together at the kitchen counter drinking tea.

"Moving day today, are you alright?" Amy asks Sheldon taking a sip of her tea and he responds with an are you serious look.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because you hate change and your best friend and roommate of almost a decade is moving out."

"Amy, I have been waiting for this day for a while, do you know how nerve wracking it has been for me to live in this apartment with three other people? It is like Woodstock in here with everyone's comings and goings."

"You are not even a little sad that Leonard is leaving." Amy asks raising her eyebrows.

"No, I mean just because it is the end of an era, and Leonard and I will never again stay up all night playing games, or say goodnight using Morse code, or have him be scared when he walks into the kitchen in the morning and I say hello without him looking. Oh dear! I am going to miss him!" Sheldon starts getting a little misty eyed and Amy puts her hand tentatively on his back.

"There, there Sheldon, it is going to be alright." Amy says lightly stroking his back in circles.

"It was until you reminded me how much I am going to miss him!" Sheldon says snappily.

"You were missing him regardless! It is healthy to express your feelings about it and not repress them."

"I do not repress my feelings, I use the Vulcan art of Kulinar."

"Same thing Sheldon, if you gave a feeling you need to express it that is what is healthy."

"Right now you are really annoying me,should I express that?" Sheldon says archly and Amy purses her lips at him and removes her hand from his back. The tension is broken when Penny and Leonard come through the door.

"Do you guys like the apartment?" Amy asks

"It is great, looks just like this one only without the crazy nerdy crap." Penny says

"Just moved our first two boxes in!" Leonard says proudly.

"Two boxes and no furniture and it is almost noon so moving day is going great!" Penny says sarcastically.

"Are Koothrapali and Wolowitz coming to help ?" Sheldon asks.

"Yeah they should be here soon. to help move the furniture, speaking of furniture Sheldon I was thinking of taking the couch with me." Leonard says.

"You mean my couch? With my spot?" Sheldon says incredulously.

"Well yeah, I did buy it, you did not want it at first, I think I should be the one to keep it."

"Amy, forget all I just said about missing Leonard! Obviously has been partaking in drugs if he thinks he is going to take the couch!"

"Why can't I take it! You could use the couch from Amy's apartment, I remember you telling me once that her couch is the only place you have ever sat where you did not have to work to find where you were comfortable! That is not even true for this couch!" Leonard yells

"Just because her couch is the only other couch I have felt comfortable with since this one does not mean you can lord it over my head! It is like Leonard Nimoy and Zachary Quinto all over again!" Sheldon says angrily.

"You said that?" Amy asks him softly her heart melting a little bit. Amy never got the impression that he felt comfortable at her apartment at all he always seemed in a such hurry to leave.

"Yes, I thought you knew that Amy, in any other apartment I ever visited I never felt comfortable. I would have to test out all the different seats available just to find one I could tolerate for a short while. If I ever had to sleep in another place it was next to impossible for me. Til I met you and the first time I visited your place I don't know how to explain it, I felt like I belonged." Amy grabs him around the middle and surprises him with a big hug. Sheldon rubs her back awkwardly public displays of affection are still hard for him.

" I told Leonard that we should just buy new furniture together and screw the old couch." Penny says

"Listen to Penny, Leonard she is making sense." Sheldon says

"Yes Leonard, I agree, your need to move the couch is purely your subconscious not wanting to move on. You have been living here for a long time and taking the couch with you is a security blanket of sorts. It reminds you of the good times you had being a single bachelor. From a neurological standpoint it would be healthy for you to get new furniture and breakaway completely from your bachelor life. "

"Good point Amy, then explain why Sheldon gets to keep it?"

"Because he is my sweet baboo and if he wants that couch then he should have that couch!" Sheldon looks at Leonard smugly and shakes his head.

"Looks like it is three against one! I keep the couch you can have that ridiculous table you bought."

"Fine you guys win, the couch stays!" Leonard says exasperated. "But just you wait and see what I do on it when you ate not home!" Leonard says going to his room to retrieve more boxes.

"We are going to change the locks right?" Amy whispers to Sheldon and he shakes his head yes.


	20. The Monkey Statue Longing

A few weeks after Leonard and Penny move out of the apartment Penny invites the girls over. Penny is really proud of the way the new apartment looks it looks sophisticated a big jump from the super hero decorated apartment she had been living in. They even bought a wine cabinet and even though the wine never stayed there long she liked having it.

It looks great in here, I am glad you convinced Leonard to get new furniture it looks like a grown ups apartment now." Bernadette tells Penny.

"Hey my old apartment was a grown up apartment." Penny says offended.

"Sure it was ,if by grown up, you mean decorated by someone's teenage daughter. Bernadette says slyly. " How about you Amy any luck getting Sheldon to let you move more of your stuff in?" Bernadette asks her and Amy looks excited.

"As a matter of fact yes, since Leonard moved out and took half the books on the bookshelves Sheldon has finally assigned me my book space allotment . I was able to finally break my babies out of storage and put them up last night."

"Just your books? what about all your other stuff?" Penny asks her

"Sheldon is still going by the model of me only introducing three new items to the apartment a month. He gave me a pass and decided that my all books could count as one thing."

"I thought you were going to turn Leonard's old room into a woman cave." Penny says.

"Yeah well Sheldon decided that instead of that we should turn the extra bedroom into a game room. He did not want a bed in there because it might convey the message that we want guests, and he said I should just put my desk in the living room with his."

"That is not fair Amy you both pay the bills you should have an equal say in what goes into the apartment." Bernadette says.

"Both you and Howard help pay the bills and you tell him what he can and can't have in the apartment." Amy points out.

"That is because Howard would clutter up our apartment with his toys! "

"Isn't that whole apartment a game room?" Penny asks.

"Well he wants to use my TV and hook all his extra video game systems up in there. " Amy sighs

"Amy if you are not OK with that you should tell him, you are going to marry him. He needs to know how you feel about things and learn to compromise. You can not spend your whole marriage walking on eggshells around him." Bernadette says taking a dainty sip of her wine.

"I know, its just that I do not want him to freak out and suddenly change his mind about things. I do not even want to plant the seed in his mind that life would be easier without me there."

"Amy, he is not going to change his mind about you because you want to move more of your stuff in! He let you put candles in the bathroom, that would have been a strike worthy offense when I first met him." Penny says.

"I do miss my monkey statue." Amy says thoughtfully

"Sheldon loves Monkeys! maybe not as much as he likes Koalas but he is still a fan! Just try him and ask I am sure that he will be OK with it." Penny says.

That settles the conversation and the girls move on to other topics before saying good night. Amy and Bernadette walk down the stairs together. Bernadette , she has to retrieve Howard from the guys apartment. Amy thinks that maybe she will talk to Sheldon about moving more of her stuff in. The apartment was looking kind if bare it turns out most of the stuff in the apartment was Leonard's.

When the girls walk through the door the guys are still playing some sort of game on their laptops. Bernadette walks over to Howard and removes his earpiece.

"Time to go Howie, say goodbye to your friends!"

"Alright guys, I am out got to get the little lady home to bed." Howard says closing his laptop and standing up stretching.

"I am out too, Penny is probably missing me by now." Leonard says cracking his knuckles and standing up.

"Raj do you want to continue?" Sheldon asks him and Raj looks at Amy who shoots him a look that says if you stay I will kill you.

"No I should get going too." and he stands up and starts gathering his things.

All the guys head out the door living Sheldon and Amy alone in the apartment. Sheldon shuts down his laptop.

"Shall we get ready for bed he asks?" Amy nods and heads to the bathroom to take a shower and brush her teeth. Amy steps into the shower there is a lot on her mind and she wants to use the solitude and hot water to sort them out. Bernadette was right this apartment was just as much hers as it was his now. She should be able to move in as much many of her things as she wanted and put them wherever she pleased. What she had explained to Bernadette was true as well though, Sheldon had already made so many allowances for her. Strayed away from his perfectly ordered world. Amy was terrified that asking one more would send him over the edge. Amy gets lost in her thoughts and screams when she feels hands wrap around her waist.

"Sheldon! you scared me what are you doing in here!" Sheldon grabs the shampoo and starts washing her wet hair. Amy does not turn around but let's him continue to massage the shampoo into her hair. It feels so good Amy practically purrs, they have not showered together in a while.

"It is simple, you have been in here a long time, I want to take a shower too. So in able to secure an ample hot water supply I propose we shower together." Sheldon pushes her gently into the stream of hot water to wash the shampoo out, then he flips her around so that he is the one under the water.

"This is kind of sudden, not that I mind it." Amy says almost breathless as she watches the water cascade down his body. His eyes are closed and she feels free to let her eyes roam and land wherever they please. Amy tries to catalog all her favorite features of his body, his long graceful neck, the sharp line of his jaw, the ridge of his clavicle, the light trail of hair on his belly that leads down. As if on cue he opens his eyes and catches her in the act of admiring him. Sheldon smiles at her and she feels her whole body clench in response. There was no denying he was beautiful when he smiled, his smile affected her deeply. Maybe it was because they were so rarely bestowed, that each one felt special. Maybe it because of the perfect imperfection she found there .The way his front two teeth crossed slightly. A harkening back to his humble beginnings in Texas where there was no money for braces. Of course by the time it he would be getting braces on he was already in college. Amy wonders if he thinks of her like this ,if he admires and loves each piece of her the same way she does him.

"Help me wash my hair?" Sheldon asks his voice husky ,handing her the bottle. Sheldon leans down to give her access . Amy giggles he is so tall it is hard to wash his hair but he likes it when she does it. Amy dollops a small amount on her hand and rubs it through his short hair. He has his hands resting on her waist as she massages his head. He straightens up to wash the soap out of his hair and Amy's hands stay locked around his neck and his hands are still grasping her waist. The change in pose makes their bodies connect in an interesting way. This was definitely new, in the past the few times they had showered together had been strictly business. Amy reaches up on her tiptoes and kisses him on the lips and be responds in kind. Then without breaking the embrace he flips her around again and lifts her up pressing her against the shower wall. Sheldon runs his hand down her leg sending tingles down her spine, then when he reaches her knee he jerks it forward and wraps it around his waist. Amy starts to panic she is too heavy, she may not be fat but she was no Penny or Bernadette. Amy would die if embarrassment if they got injured during shower sex.

"Sheldon stop, I am too heavy you are going to get hurt." Amy tries to break the embrace but he holds on tight.

"Amy first of all you are not heavy, secondly this is purely physics, your weight is equally distributed between the wall supporting you and myself. Allowing me to do this." To demonstrate he wraps her other leg around and thrusts forward. Amy us pinned to the wall impaled by him and it feels amazing.

"I love it when you talk science to me." she whispers in his ear as he moves. Between him and falling water that is starting to cool she is not going to last much longer.

"I know" he says before he finds his release and she finds hers.

After they dry off and finish getting ready for bed. They get into bed and turn off the lights.

"That was unexpected, I liked that a lot. Where did you learn to do that?" Amy asked Sheldon.

" Like any subject that I get an interest in I did some research on the topic. It turns out there are far to many graphic video's and pictures on the internet. So I picked up a few of the Cosmo's that I read when I was breaking up with String Theory. This suggestion appealed to me because having coitus in the shower seems to be one of the most hygienic ways to do it." Sheldon says matter of factly and Amy can not deny that his logic is sound.

"By the way that one was called rub a dub let's get dirty in the tub." Sheldon tells her and she laughs. Amy decides to use this moment of post coupling bliss to ask the other question that had been on her mind.

"Sheldon can I ask you something?" Amy says tentatively

"After what we just did I hardly think you need to ask." Sheldon replies.

"I was wondering if you minded if I moved some more of my things into the apartment. I know we originally agreed on a rate of three new items per month but now that Leonard is gone the apartment is looking kind of bare." Sheldon is silent for a moment and Amy worries she might have ruined the light hearted moment between them.

"I do not see why not, you could at least move some more boxes in and we could store them in Leonard's old room til we can decide what to do with them. You know what I rather liked from your old apartment that monkey statue."

"I was just thinking about that today,I miss it." Amy says and Sheldon is quiet again.

"Amy." he finally says after a long stretch of silence.

"Yes."

"I don't want you to feel like you can't ask me things. I know I can be ,for lack of a better word ,controlling at times. If something is bothering you I want you to at least ask me about it not assume I am going to be negative about it." Amy links her arm with his and snuggles closer to him.

"That is very mature of you thank you." Amy says and she feels herself drifting off against his arm.


	21. The Fowler-Cooper Conundrum

**Authors Note: Something I have been forgetting to to is remind everyone that I do not own the right to these characters lest I be sued.**

Penny and Leonard walk down their flight of stairs to Sheldon and Amy's apartment. They are met by Howard and Bernadette on the landing who ate walking up the stairs. The couples had agreed to switch it up and meet at each others apartments instead of always going to Sheldon and Amy's like they used to. This is their first time back at the old apartment in a couple of weeks. Penny knocks on the door of the apartment.

*knock knock knock*

"Sheldon and Amy!"

*knock knock knock*

"Sheldon and Amy!"

*knock knock knock*

"Sheldon and Amy!" she yells one last time before turning to the rest if the group and saying "You know for old times sake."

"It's open!" Amy yells tersely from inside and the gang walk through the door.

Sheldon and Amy are standing at the kitchen counter and it appears as though the two if them are having a heated debate.

"Ah Ladies I gave never been so grateful to gave you two wander into my apartment! Please talk some sense into this woman."

"Sense into Amy? are you sure it is not the other way around?" Penny asks sitting down."

"What's up, guys?" Bernadette asks confused

"Sheldon is under the misogynistic impression that I have to take his name when we get married."

"Not have to ,you should want to! What is the point of getting married if you do not want to share my name?"

"The point is that we love each other and want to share the rest of our lives together."

"Yes that is all very well and good, but traditionally throughout time the female entering into matrimony accepts the surname of the male. Besides Penny is taking Leonard's name!"

"First off we are not exactly a traditional couple and there are many things that traditional couples do that we do not. Secondly Penny hated her last name and was happy to be rid of it!"

"What was your last name anyway Penny?" Bernadette asks Penny

"My old last name is not important why do you not want to take his name Amy? Not that I object I am just curious?"

"Excellent question Penny you see, as doctor of neuroscience I have published many important papers under my name. Being a noteworthy scientist in my field I worry it will take a while to garner accolade's under my new name."

" That is perfectly reasonable Amy, and I worried about that too when I got don't you just hyphen your last name like I did with Howie's? " Bernadette suggests.

"I proposed that as a viable option and Sheldon rejected it." Amy says

"Viable option! Oh Please." Sheldon sniffs.

" Why not" Howard asks a little offended

"First of all Rostankowski-Wolowitz sounds like a law firm! Secondly whose names goes first? Is it Cooper-Fowler or Fowler-Cooper, do I hyphen my name ? Do not answer that of course I would not hyphen my name!" Sheldon says flapping his hands as if to wipe away that notion.

"Why not Sheldon? because you have worked to hard to establish your name and changing it at this point in your career would be harmful?" Amy asks.

" No because a man taking a woman's name would be silly! " with that Sheldon gets up and leaves going to his bedroom.

"Wow, Amy he us really worked up about this." Bernadette says sympathetically.

"I know, before you walked in he said the P word."

"P word? what is the P word?" Penny asks

"Poppycock" Amy sighs.

"Oooo Amy you are in trouble he never uses the P word!" Leonard says.

"I know, I really did not think he would care about it that much. When we were preparing dinner together I just brought it up casually. I was talking about a bunch of other wedding stuff. Honestly I did not even think he was listening." Amy says sadly.

"Let me go talk to him." Leonard says to Amy "You finish up in here and Howard and I will talk to Sheldon."

"Really I have to go too?" Howard moans

"Yes, Howie! Leave us alone so we can talk." Bernadette says pushing Howard forward. Leonard walks back to Sheldon's bedroom and Howard follows him reluctantly. When the guys disappear Penny asks Amy.

"What's up? I know for a fact you have a notebook in your purse with Amy Cooper, Cooper, Dr. and Dr. Cooper,and Mrs. Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper ,written all over it! I am not trying to be missguyistic or whatever, but you were dying to take his name."

"Misogynistic it means a hatred of women." Amy says.

"Whatever you are avoiding the question." Penny says.

"I understand where you are coming from completely on this name thing but it seems like you have had a change of heart." Bernadette says.

"Fine, at first I mentioned keeping name thing as a joke! I did not think he was listening to what I was saying so I said it to test him. I know how traditional he can be and that it might get to him. I did not expect him to react so strongly though! When he told me that he forbade me from even hyphenating my name something inside of me rebelled."

"So just tell him it was a joke and don't hyphenate your name." Penny says shrugging her shoulders.

"Well it started out as a joke but my argument for it is valid! I am a noted scientist it will take awhile to garner attention under my new last name. Why do you think all the famous actresses either keep their old names or hyphenate them? Just the other night he admitted to me that at times be can be controlling, that I should feel free to run things by him and not assume he will freak out. The first thing I ask him about he has a complete hissy fit about."

"What? What? Sheldon admitted that at times he was controlling? Do you realize how huge that is for him? That would be like Howard admitting he is a bad dresser!"

"Hey!" Bernadette says "It would be like Leonard admitting that he is over sensitive!"

"Come on guys let's not fight! I know how big that was for him to admit to. To be fair he was in a really good mood when he said it because we had just had sex in the shower."

"This is Sheldon we are talking about right? Penny asks stunned.

Meanwhile in Sheldon's room the guys are trying to reason with him so that he comes out of the bedroom.

" Sheldon you have not even set a date yet! Why are you so upset about this? " Leonard asks him sitting on the edge of his bed.

"Even so, I still do not see what is so bad about a hyphenated name." Howard says and Sheldon shoots him a look.

"You want to know why I am upset? I gave her my Memaw's ring who has been Mrs. Cooper for forty years. Amy was going to be the next Mrs. Cooper and then I find out she does not want to be that? Memaw did not give that ring to the future Ms. Fowler or Fowler-Cooper or Cooper-Fowler or whatever cockamamie name she comes up with." Sheldon says angrily.

"Sheldon, I am sure if you explain that to her she will understand your side. What exactly did you say to her when she told you she might not take your name." Leonard asks gently.

"I forbade her from doing it and said if that was the case we might not even bother with getting married at all." Sheldon says.

"You do not think that might have bothered her and made her upset?" Leonard says trying to advance him to a conclusion. Then they hear a knock at the door it is Amy.

"Can I come in and talk to my fiancee?" she asks as she pokes her head through the door.

"You can, if you plan on being reasonable." Sheldon says

"We will leave you two alone." Howard says and the guys walk out the door. Amy walks in and is holding a notebook in her arms, she slides it onto Sheldon's lap.

"What's this?" he asks her looking at it curiously.

"At the risk of great embarrassment to myself it is the notebook I use to jot down my lists in."

"Why would that be embarrassing? You know I find your penchant for list making to be one of your most endearing qualities." Sheldon says turning looking up at her confused.

"I know, turn it over." Sheldon turns the notebook over and the plethora of Dr. Amy Cooper's written there.

"If you thought this would help clarify anything you are wrong.I still do not understand." He says looking at her seriously.

"I started that list book before you even asked me to be your girlfriend. I have wanted to be Cooper for a long time now. I used to write that out like a lovesick teenager does with her big crush. I never thought there would ever be a possibility it would ever come true." Amy tells him.

"Then why did you tell me that you wanted to retain your maiden name? " He asks her.

"Well it started out as a joke." he gives her a look and she holds up her hands. "A bad one I know! but when you forbade me from doing it, well it upset me. It also made me think that maybe hyphenating my name would not be the worst idea." Amy says.

"Amy do you know what I said when I asked my Memaw and my Mother for that ring?" Amy shakes her head no. "I said you two have been for a long time and I would like to add another to the family." he tells her looking down at his hands and Amy looks at hers and studies the ring it is beautiful and truth is she is thrilled to be the lucky next or in her case .

"Sheldon, if it means that much to you then yes for all the world to see and on all my official documents I will be Dr. Amy Farrah Cooper. All I ask is that on any published material I use the hyphenated Fowler-Cooper as to avoid confusion from my earlier work." Sheldon looks like he is processing this. Amy studies his profile as he works the information out in his head. Amy longs to reach out and touch him but she has learned to keep her distance when he is like this.

"Alright, I agree to your terms." Sheldon says turning to her and looking her in the eye. Amy gets lost momentarily in their depth his sleepy blue eyes never failed to entrance her. Amy snaps out of it and remembers that their friends are still in the apartment.

"Good, now let's get back out there we are being rude to our guests."

They walk out and everyone was still gathered around the couch. It looks like Penny stepped in and helped preparing dinner and the table is set.

"You guys alright now?" Leonard asks. As they emerge back into the room.

"Yes" Amy finally came to her senses and agreed to take my name" Sheldon tells him. Amy shoots him a look but does not say anything at the end of the day Sheldon will always be Sheldon and she loves him quirks and all.

**Authors Note: I wrote this little story as a one shot a couple months ago but never published it. I was pleasantly suprised when I found it fitting into this stories plot line. So I question whether this litty ditty should be the end or should I go on to a Lenny and Shamy wedding becuase I have ideas for both. To quote Sheldon "Thoughts?"**


	22. The Mother Debacle

Amy walks in the front door to the apartment, she was out shopping and left Sheldon at home. Grocery shopping with him could sometimes be as bad as shopping with a toddler. She sees that Sheldon is on the phone and tries not to disturb him. She sneaks around him and sets the bags on the counter and starts putting away the groceries. Sheldon looks up and sees her and makes a yap-yap motion with his hand and points to the phone.

"Mother, I hardly think that is necessary." Sheldon says into the phone.

"No, Mother, I am not embarrassed of you, you have met her before." He gets up from the couch and starts pacing.

Amy raises her eyebrows wondering what he is talking about. With Sheldon it was hard to inveigle information from him. If he did not want you to know then you most likely would not find out.

"Fine! she just walked in the door, you can ask her yourself!" he says and then he holds to phone out to Amy she takes it gingerly and answers it.

"H-hello" Amy says timidly.

"Hey sugar! Its Mary, Mary Cooper , Shelly's mom ?We spoke on the phone a couple of weeks ago."

"Yes, I remember, thank you for the recipe it turned out great." Amy says.

"I am glad, you know the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, though you must already know that honey. Seeing as though you have captured my son's heart."

"Yes, well he has captured mine as well." Amy tells her.

"That's sweet, Shelly tells me that he has asked for your hand in marriage and you have accepted."

"I am over the moon about it, yes." Amy tells her.

"See that is what I want to talk to you about, now you are going to be family now. If I am going to be gaining a new daughter I would like to get to know her first! Now I know I met you once when Shelly went crazy over you and bought all them cats! But this is different back then you were just his friend now you are going to be his wife!"

"I agree , but it is hard to get to know each other when we live so far away from one another." Sheldon is mouthing say No! at her and Amy ignores him.

"Oh Please! call me Mary! is Sheldon's Memaw ,my ex-husbands mother!"

"OK Mary." Sheldon looks at her and raises his eyebrows and Amy shrugs in response.

"See that's better, now I am planning on taking a little vacation to visit Shelly soon and I think that we ought to spend a little time in each others company. What do you say?"

"That sounds wonderful Mary I look forward to it!." Amy says and Sheldon hisses at her

"I told you to say no!"

"Good, I think that is good, Shelly seemed to think that was a bad idea for some reason! Now hand me back to my boy so I can tell him I told you so!" Amy hands him back the phone and be stares at her annoyed before reluctantly holding the phone back up to his ear.

"Yes, Mother, you told me she would like the idea, no mother we are not living in sin and trying to hide it from you!" At this comment Sheldon jabs his finger angrily at Amy and Amy covers her mouth with her hands.

"Can't wait to see you either, love you too." Sheldon hangs up the phone and hangs his head.

"Sheldon! you did not tell your mother that we are living together!" Amy asks him surprised.

"No, I was very excited to tell my deeply religious mother ,that always espoused the evils of fornication and sin to me that I was shacking up with my woman!" Sheldon replies sarcastically.

"My mother felt the same way but I told her about our arrangements!"

"Oh Please! your mother was so happy to see that you would not become an old spinster living with her cats. She wouldn't have cared if you moved in with the Harlem globetrotters!" Amy has to hand it to him he is right.

"Well we are engaged! Maybe that will be enough for her?"

"Doubtful, my sister Missy is married and she made her and her husband sleep in different rooms." Sheldon says.

"Well, what are we going to do?" Amy asks. If it were up to her she would just tell Mary and be done with it. Honestly Sheldon is a grown man and was a virgin way past what normally should be expected. Yet she knows that Sheldon holds his mother in high regard and she is also desperate for his mother to like her. After their first meeting Amy got the distinct impression that Mary did not care for her much. Amy knows that Mary absolutely adores Penny and feels a twinge of jealousy. Why was it so easy for people to fall in love with Penny and so hard for people to accept her.

"Well, I suggest that you find a place to stay for a week." Sheldon tells her and Amy rolls her eyes at him.

The next day Amy goes over the Penny's to ask her for advice. Amy does not know what to do at first she was excited to spend time with Sheldon's mom ask her about what he was like she he was little. Have her fill in the gaps in her knowledge of him. Amy felt like we could never know enough about Sheldon as much as he had opened up to her, there were still parts of himself kept closed off.

"Amy, you should not be scared of Sheldon's mom. Mary is like the nicest mom in the world."

"That may be true for you Penny, but she may not be so welcoming to me, the thief of her sons virtue."

"Did you tie him down and take him against his will?"

"No!" Amy says

"Did you move into his apartment with out him knowing? No! Point is Sheldon made his own choices and quite frankly he needed to grow up and you helped him do that. You want my honest opinion I think Mary would be happy her son is finally growing up."

"Will you go with me to meet her? At least the first time I mean it is no secret that I do not make the best first impressions." Amy says sadly.

"If it will make you feel better yes, I will go with you and act like an icebreaker. Although I do think that it is important that you spend some alone time with her. I used to think Beverly would not approve of me then we hung out, got to know each other and I think she approves of me now."

"How did you do it? Make her like you?" Amy asks softly

"Well if Beverly were Sheldon's mom you would have nothing to worry about. Beverly would love you with all your brains and accomplishments, it was a little harder for me. I took her out drinking with me and we really bonded. Although I do not think I would do it again she got really trashed and kissed Sheldon. Anyway that would not work with Mary either she does not drink alcohol, you know because Sheldon's dad was an alcoholic." Penny rambles.

"Hold on! What did you just say! Beverly kissed Sheldon! When was this? Was it before or after we started dating? Sheldon told me I was his first kiss!" Amy says shocked.

"Oh my god sweetie! it was nothing! It was about a year before he met you and we made a promise never to speak of it again. I swear to you he probably does not even count it, she grabbed him and kissed him while he stood there horrified with his eyes wide open like a deer in the headlights. Believe me you are his first kiss that counts!"

"No this kiss counts! He told me the only girls he had ever kissed were his Mom, his Memaw, and his sister! He lied to me and Sheldon never lies! Why would he do that?" Amy says upset.

"Maybe he forgot?" Penny says knowing it sounds lame.

"Sheldon has an eidetic memory! he does not forget anything! Excuse me I need to go talk to me fiancée!" Amy's says getting up and stomping out of the door.

Amy bursts through the door of the apartment and sees that Sheldon is ironically on video chat with Beverly Hofstadter herself. Amy always thought it was odd that Sheldon had such frequent correspondence with Leonard's mother now it just pissed her off.

"My fiancee Amy just came in the room so am going to let you go now Dr. Hofstadter. Thank you for all of your wonderful insights goodnight."

"Goodnight Sheldon." she says before the screen goes blank.

"Were you talking about something you did not want me to hear?" she asks Sheldon sniffly. Sheldon does not catch her tone and replies.

"Not really, just my mothers need to insert herself into my life and what that says about her childhood."

" You weren't talking about what kissing your best friends mother and then lying about to your fiancee says about a man?" Sheldon look's at her with wide eyes.

"What do you know?" he asks cautiously.

"Oh, just an interesting fact that Penny just told me that I was not your first kiss and Dr. Beverly Hofstadter was!" Amy spits out angrily.

"Penny and I agreed that we would never speak of that moment ever again."

"So it is true! Why did you lie to me Sheldon?"

"I never lied, I just omitted information."

"You told me that the only people you have kissed…" Sheldon cuts her off.

"I know what I said! and I know what you said, and I know what happened later that night probably in much greater detail then your alcohol impaired brain does!" He stops to compose himself and goes on "I never told you about it for three reasons, number one, Penny, Beverly and I swore to never speak of it again. Number two receiving my first kiss ,by extreme force to my alcohol addled roommates mother is not story that I am proud of. Number three ,after that kiss all my thoughts about kissing were confirmed, it was unsanitary, distasteful, and made me feel absolutely nothing. Then that night we were just speaking of occurred and you took all I knew about kissing and threw it out the window." Sheldon walks over to her and sits next to her on the couch he wraps his arm around her awkwardly around her shoulders desperate to comfort her but unsure how to proceed.

"You still talk to her all the time you do not still hold a candle for her do you?"

"Hold a candle? Amy I just told you I felt nothing for her! I still talk to her because she is a brilliant woman she offers acumen to problems that I do not think of. "

"I thought I did that for you.," Amy says

"I will tell you something I do not think I have told anyone before. I sometimes wish that Leonard and I could switch mothers, I would have thrived in the analytical environment of the Hofstadter household. I love my mother but I sometimes find her approach smothering. I used to crave an intellectual influence in my life when I was young and I find that in Beverly. Do I feel for her any way other than that no."

"I am sorry, it just shocked me to find that out." Amy says leaning into Sheldon's embrace, he pulls her toward him and leans back so they are cuddled together.

"How did she happen to reveal that piece of information to you?" Sheldon asks.

"Well I was asking her for tips for meeting your mother and she was telling me about the time she met Leonard's mom and it just as slipped out."

"Why were you asking Penny about my mother, if you are nervous we can always cancel, come up with an excuse for her not to visit." Sheldon says hopefully.

"No, I want to spend time with your mother, I just know that she does not approve of me. I want her to accept me and she seems to like Penny so much."

"Of course she likes Penny, because Penny is what she finds familiar there are a thousand girls like Penny in Texas. There is only one girl like you, and your intellect can be daunting for someone like my mother. My mother will love you because I love you."

"I hope so." Amy says looking up at him and kissing him on the lips. "By the way I was addled by alcohol the first time I kissed you, what is the difference?"

"The difference is when Beverly kissed me I felt fear and revulsion and when you kissed me it felt like the briefly stopped spinning and all my nerves were firing shockwaves through my body, and it still feels that way."


	23. Mary Cooper Knows Best

Mary walks through the airport terminal scanning the crowds people for son. Mary told him she would take a cab like she always did but he insisted it was no trouble to pick her up. Mary catches sight of him in the crowd it is not hard as tall as he is and brightly colored as he dresses. Mary raises her hand to call out and wave to him but then lowers her hand. Something looks different about him that she can not place her finger on. Then she realizes that he looks different because he is smiling, a genuine smile, not one of those goofy grins he plasters on.

Sheldon was always such a serious child even as a baby. His twin sister would be smiling and clapping, and little Shelly would just sit there unsmiling staring at a toy like he was trying to deconstruct it with his mind. As he got older she noticed more things that were odd with her boy, like how he could speak full sentences before his sister could say Mama ; yet he rarely looked you in the eye when he spoke. While his sister was as sweet and snuggly as a little teddy bear Sheldon resisted even the lightest touch. When he got older he was even worse he spend all his time reading by himself in his room. While other kids in the neighborhood were playing and laughing, having fun little Shelly stayed inside. Mary tried to get the other kids to like him, she bought him nice clothes. Tried to get Missy to involve him in their games but he would just stand off to the side, with that serious expression his arms hugging his chest looking like he was having the worst time.

It did not help that he was so smart that the other kids were kind of afraid of him. They teased him and called him professor because he used words so big most of them could not pronounce . Then George brought home that infernal ninetendo and Sheldon had not use for human interaction ever again. When he first had brought it home Sheldon had scoffed at said it was a "brain cell killing machine" but after watching his brother and sister kill that little eyetalian plumber a couple hundred times he was dying to prove he was better then them. He took up that controller and did not put it down for twelve hours. Mary had been so happy to see him smiling and doing something a like a normal kid does she did not mind. Then here was again with that same smile on like a kid who just got the best present ever.

Mary shakes herself out of her reverie and shouts out him and walks over. She sees what he was smiling at now, he brought his little girlfriend with him, Mary could not see her through the crowd. Amy that's her name, a plain name for a plain girl she thinks. Not ugly per say she supposed if you did something with that lank hair and dressed her in something that did not look like something a grandmother would wear she might be downright cute. It is funny Sheldon and her are dressed in coordinating colors. Amy is wearing a purple sweater over a blue button down and purple nylons and Sheldon is wearing a blue T-shirt over a shirt with purple sleeves .Mary wonders if they dressed like that on purpose or if was one of those things that happen when you are with someone a lot. That reminds Mary has a bone to pick with these two. The other day Sheldon's friend Penny let it slip that they had been living in sin together for a couple of months. It was not that that bothered her so much, personally she was glad that be finally had an interest in girls, it was that he lied about it. That was not like her Shelly to lie outright about something.

"Hey there Shelly Bean! she says as she wraps her arms around him in a hug that he returns awkwardly.

" Hello Mother, I trust you remember Amy?" he asks

"Hello, , it so nice to meet you again." Amy says holding out her hand.

"Oh please! I told you to call me Mary! and put that hand down and come here!" Mary gives her a big hug that she reciprocates. "Now let me see that ring! I gotta tell you I was more surprised than a raccoon in a bear trap when Sheldon asked for that ring." Amy holds out her hand and she sees that the ring fits her perfectly. "

"Believe me I was just as surprised as you were." Amy tells her

"Can we please get a move on! I have been in this cesspool for international disease quite long enough." Sheldon says crankily.

"Oh I don't know you looked plenty happy when I first walked up." Mary says sweetly.

"That was because Amy had just made an amusing observation that these packs of travelers remind her of herds of Lemmings."

"How um… charming." Mary comments

"Do you have any luggage to claim?" Amy asks her.

"No, I tend to travel light just my purse and one carry on." Mary tells her as she rolls her suitcase behind her.

They make their way to Amy's car, Sheldon sits up front with Amy and Mary climbs in the backseat. It is time to get these two to confess before Sheldon comes up with some elaborate scheme to his their living arrangements.

"So, I was talking to Penny the other day, on The Facebook, and she tells me that her and Leonard have moved out of the apartment."

"Yes ,it has been a glorious couple of weeks not having to listen to her inane chitter chatter." Sheldon says.

"They still live close though?" Mary remarks

"Yes, they just moved into the apartment above us." Sheldon says

"Us? I thought you lived alone now?" Mary says archly.

"Force of habit, I meant me," Sheldon says quickly

"So Amy! do you and Sheldon live close to one another? He told me the other day that you drive him to work now." Amy looks at Sheldon out of the corner of her eye. It looks like he his trying to send her a message telepathically only Amy has no clue what it is. Amy wishes telepathy were scientifically possible at this moment.

"We live fairly close to each other." Amy says and looks like Sheldon relaxes a bit.

"Funny, I would say that in the same apartment and sleeping in the same room, is more than fairly close!" Sheldon looks back at her horrified.

"How did you find out?" he asks.

"Penny told me! She had no idea it was a secret! Asked me how I felt about you two getting married and living together. I told her he told me they were getting married I had no idea they were living together! Why would you lie Shelly? it is just not like you?"

"I did not lie, I just omitted vital information."

"I asked you outright if you were living in sin!"

"No, you asked if why I did not want you visiting was because I was living in sin. You never asked me out right if I was!" Sheldon says defensively.

"Then why did you not want me visiting then?" Mary asks offended.

"I think that is fairly obvious, you told me your primary objective of this visit was to get to know Amy."

"What is so wrong about me wanting to get to know my daughter in law and the mother of my future grand children?"

"Yeah Sheldon what is so wrong with that? Are you ashamed of me?" Amy asks.

"No! my god why would you jump to a conclusion like that? Mother you tend to be, and I mean this in the nicest way possible, extremely judgmental. I love Amy, I am going to marry her regardless of what your opinion of her may be. I just did not want you to try to sway me in case your opinion of her differs from mine."

"Sheldon, I approve of Amy, she is a lovely young woman. I would never try and sway your opinion of her. Shelly honey, I am not event mad about y'all living together, I am just glad you finally met someone who loves and accepts you for who you are."

"Thank you mother, that means a lot to me."

They arrive at the apartment Sheldon helps carry his mothers things upstairs. The moment Mary walks into the apartment and from the moment she walks in she does not understand how Sheldon thought he would be able to hide their living together. It was obvious that a feminine touch had been through it. While some of his super hero nonsense was still up there was a lot less of it.

"We were not going to put a bed in the extra room, but when you said you were visiting Amy said we should. So you do not have to get a hotel room during your stay."

"Well that, is awfully nice." Mary says.

"Would you like anything to drink Mary?" Amy asks her as Sheldon brings her bags to the extra room.

"Yes, sugar, that journey left me mighty parched." Mary tells her sinking into an arm chair.

"We have tea and water…"

"Do you have coke or ?"

"Yes, do you want a glass?" Amy asks her

"No, honey, from the can is fine." Amy brings her the can and sits down on the couch. Sheldon comes out and sinks down next to her on his spot. Mary notices how near each other they sit. Shelly normally could not stand for anyone to be on the same couch as him let alone pressed against his side.

"Mary, I thought maybe tonight you and I could go out for dinner with Penny and Bernadette."

"That sounds lovely, now Penny I have met, who is Bernadette?"

"Bernadette is Wolowitz's wife" Sheldon tells her.

"The Jewish astronaut that lives with his mother?"

"Well, he lives with Bernadette now but yes."

"So Penny , Bernadette and you are all friends and Leonard , Howard, and Sheldon are friends and all of y'all are coupled up. That's sweet! now what about that little Indian boy that can't talk to the ladies?"

"He can talk to them now he just can't keep one around." Amy tells her.

That night they all the girls meet at the Cheesecake Factory for dinner. Mary is enjoying the evening out ,as much as she loves her son she is anxious to learn something more about his future wife. They all place their orders and start chatting, Mary has always liked Penny she has been a good friend to Sheldon over the years and that little Bernadette is awfully nice too.

"So Mary, I would love to hear about what Sheldon was like when he was little." Amy tells her.

"See that's interesting, you would love to know what he was like back then, and I would like to know what he is like now. You know how Sheldon is you ask him a question and if he does not want to answer it he clams up. The harder you pry the tighter he shuts!"

"That's Sheldon alright." Amy says.

"How about this you ask me a question about him then I get a question answered back?"

"Ah, a little quid pro quo?" Amy says

"No thank you honey, I am not much for weird seafood. What do you say?" Amy and Bernadette exchange looks but in the end Amy nods her head.

"Deal." she says.

"So you want to know what Shelly was like when he was young? Well I have something here you might like." Mary digs in her purse and takes out a small photo album and hands it to her. Amy looks through the pictures cooing over his baby and toddler pictures and show's them to Penny and Bernadette.

"Aww! Missy and him are so cute in this one!" Penny says holding up s picture of baby Sheldon and his sister.

"Yes, that is when he still let me dress them alike, he put a stop to that when he was two! You know back when he was born ultrasound quality was not that good so I knew I was having twins but not what sex they were. Well I got it in my head that it was twin girls, I guess because I already had George Jr. and after what a handful he was I wanted girls. So I decided that I was going go name them Missy and Shelly ;boy was I surprised when Shelly was a boy! "

"So you named him Sheldon to keep the Shelly part?" Bernadette asks

"Yep I could not think of any boy names at all so I just picked one from a baby book that sounded like what I had already picked out."

"Is this him and Missy too?" Amy asks holding up a picture of a dark haired girl towering over a slight pale boy.

"Lord, yes, that is right before he went to high school so he must have been around nine here. Shelly was what you would call a late bloomer,

" I'll say" Penny remarks

"Sheldon was sickly and small until he hit around fifteen years old and the he came back from his summer in Europe looking like he had been put through a taffy puller."

"High school must have been hard for him, socially wise, I mean I am sure he had no problem with the course work." Amy says sadly.

"Honey you have no idea! In high school most kids are dating, and going to dances and that sort of thing. Well Sheldon was only nine and ten years old, not to mention small for his age. The other kids had a hard time accepting that a little kid was so much smarter than they were and he got beat up and teased pretty bad."

"I thought I had it bad." Amy says. "At least I was mostly ignored."

"That brings me to my question, how did you two met? Sheldon was been pretty hazy on the details and Leonard told me that Howard and Raj set you two up. Now forgive me for asking but I never thought Sheldon showed any inclination towards wanting a girl before."

"It is actually a funny story! Do you mind if I tell it Amy?" Penny asks.

"No go ahead you were the one who was there." she tells her.

"OK, so Howard and Raj signed him up for a dating site without him knowing about it. Then when they met Amy while posing as Sheldon online and they blackmailed him into going on a coffee date with her! To answer your question no, Sheldon had no interest in girls, or boys for that matter till he met Amy."

"If Sheldon was forced, what were you doing on that site Amy? Did you have many boyfriends before Sheldon?" Mary asks

"My mother made me agree to go on at least one date a year, Sheldon was the only successful one. All the others either showed up and left or stayed through dinner then snuck away leaving me with the bill. Sheldon is the first boyfriend that I have ever had." Amy tells her.

"So ya'll are each others first." Mary clears her throat "everything?" and Amy catches the suggestion in her tone and colors.

"Yes, Sheldon is the first and only man I have ever loved." Amy answers her.

"Good, I think that is good, I never thought Sheldon would find anyone, I had gotten kind of tired of explaining why Sheldon lived with a male roommate to all the busybodies at the church. Not that I would love him any less if that were the case. You know when he first started talking about Amy I thought it might have been some sort invention he whipped up and Amy was some sort of abbreviation. When he was young he was always coming up with the craziest stuff and half the time it actually worked."

"Sheldon talks about me?" Amy asks.

"Honey, lately you are all he talks about ! Our phone conversations went from him yammering on about his science stuff to ,Amy says this, Amy did that. Never any of the juicy stuff though mostly just your boring science stuff." Mary tells her and Amy beams.

Mary is starting to really like Amy the more she talks to her and the more she gets to know her the less plain she becomes. By the end of the evening Mary is quite glad her boy has landed himself a catch like her.


	24. The Mother Convergence

**I have Amy's mother in this story since we know next to nothing about her from the show I have added what I feel she would be like. Again I own none of this and comments are always welcomed.**

It is Saturday and Leonard finds himself alone in his apartment, Penny is off on the audition rounds. It feels weird being alone and Leonard decides to head downstairs to see how Sheldon and his mom are doing. Leonard would like to get Mary's advice about a couple things that had been on his mind. It was so much easier to talk to Mary than to his own mother.

He knocks on the apartment door and Sheldon answers the door.

"Hello Leonard to what do I owe this unexpected visit?" Sheldon asks him

"Well Penny is out, and I thought maybe I would stop by and visit with Mary while she is in town." Leonard tells him, Mary rounds the corner of the hallway.

"That is sweet, Leonard ,but Amy and I are just heading out the door. Maybe some other time OK sugar?" Amy pops around the corner behind her and it looks like they are dressed up. "We will be back before supper time OK Shelly bean?" Mary tells him and gives him a kiss on the cheek.

"Have fun with Leonard." Amy tells him and kisses his other cheek and then they both head out the door. Sheldon looks after their retreating backs and wipes the kiss off his cheek and shakes his head.

"Must be hard to be adored by your mother and your fiancée." Leonard remarks sarcastically.

"You don't know the half of it." Sheldon says not catching the sarcasm.

"So they are getting along that is good."

"Yes, they seem to have bonded over my mothers love of telling embarrassing anecdotes about my childhood and Amy's fondness for listening to them." Sheldon tells him seriously.

"Where are they going, they looked dressed up." Leonard says sitting on the couch.

"They are going to lunch and shopping with Amy's mother so the two moms ,can gab it up." Sheldon tells him walking over to his laptop and firing it up.

"Isn't that something you should be going to as well?"

"There was some discussion on the subject but it was quickly dismissed."

"Why?"

"Well the first reason brought up was that I cannot be trusted to behave myself. The second reason is that I am given to believe this is some sort good will mission with the objective to curry favor back on my side from Amy's mother."

"Amy's mother does not like you? why?"

"Well, before Amy and I started dating, she had me pose as her boyfriend to get her mother off her back. In the conversation that followed I told her mother that I enjoyed making love to her daughter's vagina. Apparently that is not an appropriate thing to say to your future mother in law."

"So tell her it was just a joke, a very bad creepy joke." Leonard says.

"Well now that the statement is true, that seems a little belated don't you think?" Sheldon says looking up from the computer and Leonard tries not to look grossed out " Anyways I am sure my mother can talk me up. My mother has been able to get me out of more than one sticky situation with her silver tongue and honeyed words."

"Really like what?"

"Where do I begin? When I was eight I got booted from the local laser tag establishment for bringing my own laser gun and she got them to take me off the blacklist."

"Why is bringing your own laser gun wrong?"

"It was one I built myself that shot actual lasers, but as my mom pointed out they were so weak it would not even stun you."

"This is fun tell me another time." Leonard says.

"Good lord, you are starting to sound like Amy! Tell me about when Sheldon did this, Tell me about when Sheldon did that. What do you mean Sheldon was on the CIA's watch list?" he says .

"You were on the CIA's watch list?"

"Yes, twice,and both good examples of my mother being able use her charm to get me out of trouble."

"Was that your year you spent learning espionage?" Leonard says teasing him.

"Don't be silly! The first time I was ten and attempting to purchase plutonium online. The second time I was caught hacking into their computer system trying to erase evidence of the plutonium incident."

"So as a child you were on the fast track to becoming a super villain? Leonard says smiling and Sheldon stares at him blankly before he rewards him with one of his breathy laughs.

At the restaurant Amy is extremely nervous having her mother met the mother of her future husband. It was honestly something she never thought she would have to worry about. Mary had been so welcoming and accepting of her she was quite frankly astonished. Amy had expected a much larger speech about sinning from her from all Sheldon had told her about her religious convictions. Last night before Sheldon went to sleep on the couch (they had decided to sleep separate in difference to Mary) he had told her the story about what happened when he had Howard had visited Texas. Perhaps having her son see her in such a compromising position had made her reevaluate some things. Amy catches sight of her mother who is already seated and walks over to her. Her mom stands up to greet them, Amy can not get over how her mother looks so small and frail next to Mary.

" Hello Mother, how have you been? " Amy asks giving her mom a brief hug.

"I have been well, Amy Farrah Fowler you are forgetting your manners! You need to introduce me!"

"Sorry Mom, this is Mary Cooper, Sheldon's mother, Mary this is my mother Peggy Jean Fowler."

"Pleased to meet you Peggy." Mary says holding out her hand, and Peggy takes it awkwardly and gives it a limp shake and they sit down.

"So your boy is the one who took my daughter's flower." Peggy says unfolding her napkin and placing it in her lap. Mary gives her a look that says you do not want to play this game and shakes out her napkin. Amy shrinks back into her chair wishing she could disappear.

"So your daughter is the one living in sin with my boy who was raised in a christian household and knows better." Mary counters.

"Oh, look they have sliders! I like to eat those tiny hamburgers and pretend I am a giant!" Amy says trying to change the subject.

"Now, at least he is trying to make an honest woman out of her! They had barely met when he robbed her of her virtue!" Peggy says.

"Robbed! Not that Shelly tells me much about such delicate subjects but it was my understanding that this, ahem coupling of theirs was fairly recent."

"As far as I know it has been going on for years! I ask Amy to let me meet this boy she has been going on about and she presents me a heathen who can't stop going on about making love to my little girl!" Amy colors and decides it is time to come clean.

"Mother, I have a confession to make." Amy begins but her mother interrupts.

"I knew it! This has all been some elaborate ruse and Sheldon is no more real than Armin the Miniature horse breeder!" Peggy says.

"No Sheldon is real! tell her he is real Mary!"

"Believe you me Peggy my Sheldon is very real, while we are on the subject whom might Armin be?"

"My made up boyfriend, not really important, the point is that when Sheldon said all of that to you, he was not my boyfriend. Sheldon was friend at the time and I conned him into perpetrating a clever ruse with me. I just wanted you to get off my back about dating and it worked, and you know what once that pressure was lifted I did get a boyfriend. "

"So are you getting married or not?" Peggy asks.

"I am, and I am very happy, please mother try to be happy for me!"

"Amy! I am very happy for you! I never thought this day would ever come, honestly, I did not think you had any interest in *whispers* men."

" Honey! you and me were in the same boat I have been explaining for years about Sheldon and his roommate!" Mary tells her.

"I blame myself, I left Amy alone with her grandmother and great aunt , far to much. I had no choice I was a single mother."

"I know what you mean, Sheldon's father was no help at all raising the boy! Sure he was OK with George JR. but he was baffled with Sheldon and all his science nonsense!"

"I tried to raise Amy with the right values but instead of knowing values and making good choices she just did nothing at all!"

"You are preaching to the choir sister!"

"I never minded being left with grandmother and auntie it was fun. We would do puzzles, they taught me how to quilt and knit.

" Which is all very well and good sweetie but you would stay home with grandma well into your twenties when most young adults start going out and having friends."

"I probably still would have Saturday puzzle night with grandma if she had not died." Amy says sadly

"Sheldon was the same way ,let me tell you a story. Sheldon come home from college for the summer one year. He must have been around nineteen at the time, he had already gotten his PH.D. Well I figured he would take a break from all this academic stuff and be a normal teen at least for the summer. There was this girl who friends with his sister who was sweet on him, always trying to get his attention. She tried everything to get him to notice her but for all Sheldon cared she might have just been a fly on the wall."

"Really, what did she do?" Amy asks. The waiter comes up and takes their orders then Mary continues.

"Say things like , " Oh Sheldon you are so young to be a doctor you are just like Dougie Howser" and of course that just offended him because he is not that kind of doctor. Or she would try to play those silly video games with him and he would get mad because she would want to play as the wrong character. Poor girl no matter what she did he just did not pay her a lick of attention. Missy finally had to sit her down and explain that Sheldon just did not feel that way about girls and not to be offended. I saw her just the other day at church just about fainted dead when I told her Sheldon was getting married to a girl."

"So are you active in the church Mary?" Peggy asks

"Yes, honey I am filled with the light of the lord." Mary replies.

"Then maybe you can talk some sense into them and convince them they need to be married in a church." Peggy says.

"Mother I told you, Sheldon and I have not discussed where or when we are getting married . When we do you can be assured that it will not be in a church as neither of us subscribe to the doctrines of organized religion."

"I don't care what doctrine you follow, you need to be married in a church."

"Yes, since you don't have a church you could fly down to Texas and be married in our little church. That would show everyone in town that I ain't lying about you two."

"Thank you, Mary but I do not think Sheldon would go for that."

"You are probably right, it does not hurt to dream though." The food arrives and the busy themselves with eating.

"So I thought maybe we could pop into that little wedding boutique next door when we are done eating." Peggy says.

"Mom, I told you that we have not even started planning any thing yet why would I try on dresses? I do not know if we are going to have the type of wedding where I need to wear a dress. Besides I want Penny and Bernadette with me when I try them on." Amy tells her.

"Now Amy, who is more important your friends or your family! I have been waiting for this moment for a long time. Can't you just humor your old mother for an afternoon?"

"You know your mother has a point, come hell or high water I will be here again to see y'all's wedding but I won't be able to be here for all the planning. It would tickle me to death to see you try on some wedding dresses. You could just think of it as big old goof, just three gals hanging out trying on clothes." Amy thinks it over and it does sound fun.

"Alright let's do it, it would be nice to feel like a princess for the day. In fact I just happen to have this with me." Amy digs in her purse and pulls out a velvet bag.

"What's that Amy?" her mother asks and Amy pulls out a tiara from the bag and pops it on her head.

"That is an awfully nice crown you got there sweetie." Mary says a little confused.

"I know! Sheldon bought it for me it has real diamonds in it!"

"Sheldon bought that for you?" Mary asks touched, Sheldon was never one for gift giving and for him to pick out something that was obviously so special to her,was amazing.

After lunch they head over to the bridal boutique it is a nice little shop and the proprietor greets the eagerly. The woman is thin and elegant with a short black hair that grazes her chin, she is dressed in a chic white pantsuit.

"Hello ladies! My name is Cynthia, How can I help you today? Picking up some bridesmaids dresses perhaps?" she asks trying to assess the situation.

"Not this time! I am the bride!" Amy says eagerly

"Of course! When is the big day?" she asks trying to mask her surprise.

"We have not set a date yet, we just got engaged, I am just here to look and try on a few dresses to humor my mother and future mothers in-law. Amy tells her.

" Did you ladies have any styles in mind?" The sales lady asks

"I always thought that Princess Diana's dress was beautiful!" Peggy says

"Now , I never cared for her dress, plus that is a little out of date now." Mary remarks. "Why don't you just show us a couple of the most popular styles."

"Very well , you know I just got in the most beautiful dress the other day let me show it to you." Cynthia walks to the back and fetches a dress and brings it out. It is really lovely with a full skirt and a sweetheart neckline and delicate beading on the train.

"It is sleeveless." Amy says wrinkling her nose at it.

"We have some lovely styles with sleeves, follow me, " Cynthia leads them around the racks and Amy finds a couple of styles that she wants to try on. The first dress has a high collar with an attached beaded choker, the sleeves are long and end in beaded cuffs. The body is cut slim to the body and it has a long train. Amy steps out in it and her mother claps her hands.

"Oh Amy you look amazing!"

"I don't know…" Any says feeling kind of silly in the dress.

"Amazing if she was in the old time photo booth at the state fair!" Mary cries. "Next one."

The next one is made if some sort of floaty material and has long trailing sleeves. It has an empire waist and the skirt billows out. It reminds Amy of an medieval style and she likes it.

"This one is nice!" Amy says stepping out and spinning around letting the material float around her.

"Absolutely not!" Peggy says vehemently. "I will not have my daughter get married dressed like Stevie Nicks!"

"Maybe try another one sugar." Mary agrees.

Amy retreat s back into the dressing room and sighs, this is pointless she thinks. Most likely Sheldon , if he ever does set a date, will insist they get married in their Star Trek costumes. Not like any of these dresses will look good in her anyways she thinks. In all of them she has looked like a frumpy mouse playing dress up. Amy will try on one more dress then insist that they leave. Amy picks the dress she knows will look the worst in her to drive home the point that dress shopping is just not for her. The dress is beautiful on the hanger, it has a low neckline that pulls off the shoulders a bit and long lace sleeves. It's bodice is fitted and it has a full princess skirt. Amy steps into the dress and struggles with the zipper when she looms up and into the mirror she is stunned by what she sees. It is beautiful on as it was on the hanger, it seems to compliment every curve and plane of her body. The dress shows off her shoulders a feature of hers that she knows Sheldon fond of. The neckline is a little low but not so much so that it shows of to much bosom. Amy feels like crying she has never felt more beautiful in her life and she might not even be able to wear this dress ever again. Amy steps tentatively out of the dressing room and she hears a gasp as Mary and Peggy catch sight of her. Her mother actually starts crying and Mary looks a little misty eyed.

"Oh Amy! that is the one! You look so beautiful it makes my heart hurt!" Peggy gushes wiping a tear from her eye. "Let me take your picture!" Peggy snaps a dozen photos with her phone, then takes Amy's phone and snaps a few more.

"She is right honey, you look like an angel in that dress." Mary walks over to her as she gazes at her reflection in the three way mirror. Mary stands behind her and gathers up her hair in a French twist." Imagine your hair up and your little tiara on you will look a vision!" Peggy walks over and hugs Amy tightly. Looking at herself and the woman around her Amy breaks down and starts crying. Amy can not remember the last time she allowed herself to cry.

"What's wrong sweetie?" her mother asks.

"I don't know! before I tried on this dress I did not care how I got married or what I got married in and now I know I will always regret it if I do not get married in this dress."

"Sugar, there is no way that you are not getting married in this dress." Mary tells her.

"How can you be so sure? You know Sheldon as well as I do and if he does not want a wedding where we wear traditional clothes then we won't get married at all! I love this dress but I love your son more."

"You let me worry about Sheldon, he may be stubborn but there are ways around it. In the meantime let me buy you this dress. Since I do not know how much else I will be able to do at least let me do this." Mary tells her smoothing down her hair.

"The mother of the bride should pay for the dress." Peggy objects "Besides I have been saving for this for a long time. I almost gave up now I am glad that I didn't."

"How about we split the dress?" Mary says.

"Alright" Peggy agrees.

They pay for the dress and say their goodbyes, Amy hugs her mother and thanks her. This was the most fun that she has had with her mother in a long time. Amy can not help but gaze fondly in the rear view mirror at the garment bag hanging in her backseat. Now she just has to figure out how to sneak it up four flights of stairs and hide it in the apartment without Sheldon finding out.


	25. The Tell Tale Dress

Leonard suggests to Sheldon that they take Mary out to lunch and then sight seeing around town. The last time he tried taking her she was so upset over Sheldon's behavior all she wanted to do was look at churches. Leonard invited Penny to go with them but she had something she wanted to do with the girls. That was fine with him he wanted to get some advice from Mary and it would be hard to ask with Penny around.

"This is nice! I feel like I have hardly seen you two my whole visit and now it is almost over!" Mary says walking in between Leonard and Sheldon and wrapping her arms around their shoulders.

"Who's fault is that? You have been spending all your time with Amy , who is not even your daughter yet."

"That was kind of the point of my visit, Shelly to get to know the girl who is going to be my daughter in law some day! Now that we are on the subject though when are you going to make this thing official?"

"I think getting engaged classifies the relationship as official." Sheldon says shirking out of her embrace.

"You know what I mean, when are you going to set a date! When do I get to see my handsome man in a tux saying his vows before God and his family."

"Mother, I never said anything about getting married in a church or in a tuxedo! As for when I do not know, I hardly think we have to rush things, we already live together."

"See son, that's where you are wrong! That is why living together before marriage is just no good, you get to comfortable and you forget all values! Not that you need to go marching down that aisle tomorrow but I would like to see it all settled before to long. Memaw is getting on up there in the years and I an sure she would like to see her moonpie happy before she goes."

"Good heavens! is Memaw sick! If she is sick why are you waiting til now to tell me!" Sheldon says shocked

"No! Memaw is fine don't get your kickers all twisted! I just meant she is not as young as she used to be."

"Of course not, we get older everyday , right now you are not as young as you were five minutes ago." Sheldon tells her.

"I think what your mother means is that, your like to drag your feet and she would like to see a wedding sooner rather than later. Actually Mary I would like to get your opinion on something with Penny.I want to start planning the wedding but she can not commit to a date."

"Now, I was the same way when I married Sheldon's father, I was so excited when he asked me then I hemmed and hawed at setting a date."

"How did you finally decide on one?" Leonard asks her.

"Well I got pregnant with George Jr. and that really sped the whole thing along." Sheldon does a double take and looks at his mother stunned.

"I knew in those baby pictures of George Jr. he was far to big to be a premie!" Sheldon says shaking his head.

"Yes honey, your mother made some mistakes when she was young, but I was young and stupid. Now I want to ask you something and I want you to answer honestly."

"I do not know if I care to hear more of your candor." His mother shoots him a look and she sighs. "Fine, yes I will endeavor to give you a honest answer."

"Does my marriage to your father, and all the problems we has make you question whether you want to marry Amy?" Sheldon contemplates the question for a moment and sits down on a bench Mary sits down beside him.

"I suppose, on some level, I do worry that when Amy and I actually get married it will end up like your and fathers marriage. We get along so well, we hardly ever fight and if we do we never scream at each other. I grew up in a house where it always seemed like someone was screaming and fighting with someone. I know father was an alcoholic and that had something do with it. I don't know I guess I worry that someday I will turn out like him as far as I have tried to separate myself from my upbringing."

"I thought so, now listen to me and listen to me good! What you have with Amy is nothing like what me and your father had. I got married far to young, the only thing your father and I had in common was our love if having a good time. I fell for your father because he was handsome and charming and a lot of fun. Let me tell you those are not qualities that last in a marriage. The more he fell into his bottle the more I fell out of love with him. Now Amy and you got something special that your father and I never had, you love and understand each other like nothing I have ever seen before. I do not think if you searched all over the world you would find another young lady quite like her. As far as you turning out like George that is just not gonna happen, they only thing you inherited from him was your height."

"I guess that is true, So when do you think we should set the date for?" Sheldon says after digesting the information his mother just gave him."

"Well honey that is a question only you can answer, what are some dates that are special to y'all?"

"I know what date I want to get married to Penny September 24th,"

"What is September 24th?" Sheldon asks him

"It is the first time that I ever laid eyes on her ,it was love at first sight. I knew from that moment that she was going to be the girl I was going to marry. I remember every detail about that day, and I don't have an eidetic memory so it is far more impressive for me."

"You want my advice, tell Penny that story and she will have no problem setting the date with you. If she does after hearing that story then maybe she is not the girl for you."

"I did not know that I wanted to marry Amy when I first met her, I did not believe in marriage or love back then."

"When did you start to believe in it then?" Mary asks him and he thinks about it for awhile.

"It did not happen overnight, I did not wake up one day and decide that I loved her. One time I would find myself thinking about her when she was not around and wish she was there. Or I would be sitting next to her and my hand would itch to touch her and I never had the wish to touch anyone before. I just can not think of one specific date that encompasses the significance of our relationship."

Penny and Bernadette are sitting on the bed in the extra bedroom in the apartment. Penny stares at the garment bag hanging in the closet currently the only thing inhabiting the closet. Bernadette rubs her friends back consolingly. They are waiting for Amy to come over and model her new wedding dress for them.

" Uggh!" Penny groans. "That stupid dress is haunting me!"

" If it bothers you so bad just tell her to find another place to store it." Bernadette says.

"No, I promised her that I would hide it for her until she gets the lady balls to tell Sheldon about it." Penny sighs.

"Just curious ,why does it bother you so much having it here?"

"No good reason! It is kind of like Schrödinger's cat you know? In the bag the dress is hidden and I know once I see the dress I will know for sure how I feel about marrying Leonard. So in the bag my marriage is neither alive or dead but once it is out if the bag I will know!" Penny exclaims.

"Penny if you are having doubt's like that then it is safe to say the dress is dead already." Bernadette tells her.

"No, maybe I am not explaining myself well enough. OK it is not like Schrödinger's cat it is like that story written by that creepy guy. You know the one where the guy hears a heart beating in his house and it drives him crazy?"

"The Telltale Heart, by Edgar Alan Poe?"

"Yes! that one it is like the dress is in here and I can almost feel its presence and I want so badly to look at it but then I am terrified too at the same time." Bernadette gives her a concerned look but they hear a knock in the door and go to answer it. It is Amy and she looks radiantly happy and she bounces in the door.

"Dress day! I have been waiting for days to show you guys my dress!"

"So are you and Sheldon getting closer to planning this wedding now?" Bernadette asks her.

"No, I did not even plan on buying a dress, just in case he gets cold feet you know? My mom insisted in going shopping. Then I tried on the dress and then his mom and my mom fought over who would buy it! So I could very well own a dress that is never going to be worn." Amy sighs her mood deflating a little.

"Never mind all that let's see it on! I am so excited!" Penny says easily masking her emotions. "First let's do your hair and make up!"

Penny brings out her make up case and starts applying make up to Amy. Bernadette starts working in her hair first straightening it then braiding it and setting it in an elegant updo. Penny makes her make up natural just enough to highlight her natural beauty without changing her look to much. They guide Amy into the bedroom and block her view from all the mirrors. Amy puts on the dress and the girls are speechless.

"Amy! I do not care what we have to do you are walking down the aisle in that dress!" Penny says choked up.

"You have got to see yourself Amy!" Bernadette says leading her out of the bedroom and into Penny's in front of the full length mirror. She spins Amy around so she can look at herself and Amy covers her mouth with her hand.

"I am so beautiful!" Amy cackles.

"You really are sweetie!" Penny says hugging her tightly ,then they hear Sheldon's trademark three raps in the door followed by him calling Amy, Bernadette, Penny!

"Oh my God! he can not come in here!" Amy cries!

"Don't worry we'll get rid of him!" Bernadette tells her and she and Penny hurry out of the room to get the door. Penny opens up the door on a crack.

"What's up Sheldon?" Penny asks

"Is Amy here?" he asks.

"Umm no she is not." Penny tells him.

"Nice try, her phone has GPS and I know that she is in here my query was purely cursory. I need to speak to her right now."

"Sheldon Amy is busy right now." Bernadette tells him.

"It's OK let him in." Amy says behind them "He is not going to stop until you let him in."

"She's right." Sheldon confirms and Penny reluctantly opens up the door for him and he walks in and freezes in his tracks when he sees Amy in the dress.

"What is going on here?" he asks confused.

"I can explain! after lunch with our mothers, they strong armed me into going dress shopping. Then they fought over who got to buy me the dress and it made me feel special. I do not have to wear this on our wedding day, you do not even have to set a wedding date. I was just showing Penny and Bernadette the dress before I returned it."

"Why would you bring it back?" he asks her.

"Well we never discussed getting married in a traditional way and to buy a dress before discussing it with you was presumptuous."

"Amy, that is what I came here to talk with you about."

"Oh God! you are calling it off!" Amy says walking briskly back to the extra bedroom, he stops her by grabbing her arm.

"Amy stop!" She spins around to face him and be gently grabs her face and kisses her she stops in her tracks an kisses him back he breaks the kiss but keeps his hand gently on her face. "I came here to tell you that I have decided on a date for our wedding."

"You have?" Amy asks breathless

"Yes, I was having a discussion with Leonard and my Mother and he was telling us how he knows the date be wants to marry Penny because he wanted to marry her from the moment he met her. I could not think of the moment that I fell in love with you."

"Leonard said that!" Penny asks.

"Yes but that is not the point of my story! Please! I kept thinking about it, when did I know that you were the one? Was it May 24th when we first met? Was it in September on our first date? Was it in November when I first asked you to be my girlfriend? Then I realized that my life has not been the same ever since you entered it. That whatever date I chose was arbitrary, that I can not assign one date as special among the many I have shared with you." Sheldon gulps and pauses. "So I think we should get married six months from today, it will give us enough time to plan a very small ceremony and allow for our families to make travel arrangements."

"Sheldon that sounds wonderful." Amy says wrapping her arms around him. "But you have already seen my dress, is'nt that bad luck?"

"Only if you subscribe to silly superstitions which neither of us do. I definitely want you to wear this for our wedding."

Penny watches them and her heart swells she has seen these two weirdos grow and change so much. It is hard to believe that these two are the same people as four years ago. Seeing Amy standing there beaming up at Sheldon completely lovestruck makes her wish Leonard were here. Penny is certain now that Leonard is the one, she remembers that first day meeting him. Maybe it was not love at first sight but she felt something, and she could not stop thinking about him that night. How sweet he was, how soulful his eyes were from that first meeting he had wormed his way into her heart.

"So is the dress dead or alive? " Bernadette whispers to her.

"Alive" , she says tear rolling down her cheek "Very much alive!"


	26. Vegas Baby!

**I was very excited to see that I have reached 50 followers on my story! As a celebration I decided that I would write a fun chapter. I love a drunk Sheldon and I adore a jelly Shelly so I present to you drunk and Jelly Shelly. Let's see if I can get comments to 100!**

The guys are all walking down a hallway of a hotel getting ready to go into their hotel room. The whole gang have decided to go to Vegas together as a last hurrah before both Leonard and Sheldon get married. The girls have come along too but they are staying in different suites.

"I've got to say I am surprised that you decided to come along with us. Vegas does not really seem like your thing" Raj comments to Sheldon as the guys bring their bags into a hotel room.

"You are no more surprised than myself, on a list of a hundreds of items that are classified as my thing Vegas is definitely not one of them."

"Then why are you here?"

"I thought that was fairly obvious, this weekend was billed as a joint bachlorette/bachelor weekend to celebrate both the upcoming nuptials. My fiancee is participating in the weekend so I shall too." Sheldon says annoyed.

"Yeah but Amy is the fun one who likes to do things like this." Howard says.

"Excuse me! I think I an in the running for the title of the fun one in the relationship! I think my original plan for my bachelor party was far more fun and exciting than a couple of nights of poor judgment clouded by alcohol and rudimentary card games."

"You wanted to go to the zoo." Leonard says coming up behind him.

"Hey those apes in the primate cage really know how how to have a good time." Sheldon says and Leonard gives him a look.

"Anyway , Amy is most definitely the fun one." Howard tells him.

"You know what, I am going to prove to you that I am every bit as fun as Amy! Maybe even as fun as a barrel full of monkeys which we could have seen if we went to the zoo!"

The girls are getting ready to go out in their hotel room it is a really nice suite.

"Bernadette this room is amazing!" Penny tells her

"Thanks! It is nicer than the boys room downstairs, it least I could do with my two best friends getting married soon."

"We each get our own room this is so cool!" Amy says putting lipstick on and puckering up to the mirror.

"Yes, and we all agreed even though the guys are here too this suite is no boys allowed! So no sneaking your man in after dark, I am looking at you Amy!" Penny says making the I'm watching you gesture at her and Amy rolls her eyes.

"Sheldon and I agreed that this weekend was about bonding with our friends and not pair bonding with each other. Although he might have a hard time keeping his end of the agreement when he sees me in this." Amy says spinning around showing off her dress. It is modest by most standards but much more revealing than anything she has ever worn before. It is solid black with a low neckline and the hemline ends shortly before the knees.

"Oh yeah! Amy you are going to knock em' dead with those knees!" Penny says laughing she is wearing a tight hot pink bandage dress that shows off all her best assets.

"The boys are going to be eating their hearts out! Once they see us they will think twice about going to a strip club!" Bernadette agrees she is wearing a tight purple dress and strappy shoes that make her several inches taller.

"OK let's get going, I want to hit the bar and see how many free drinks this little number scores us!"

The girls head downstairs and met the guys in the lobby of the hotel. Amy catches sight of Sheldon first and her heart skips a beat he looks so handsome in his black suit. It is one she has never seen him in before he usually favors his gray or his plaid suit. Sheldon does a double take when he sees Amy in her slightly revealing look.

"Amy! what are you wearing?" he asks her.

"Do you like it?" she asks beaming

"You need to go upstairs and get one of your cardigans and put it on!" he tells her and the smile disappears from her face.

"Sheldon! I am not putting on a sweater! It is like 110 degrees outside why are you acting like this?" Amy asks him.

"I do not want other men to see your bosom on full display like that." Sheldon hisses at her.

"Do you not trust me? I am not going to be interacting with other men!" Amy tells him.

"I trust you, however, I do not trust the gaggle of good time gals accompanying you!

" Hey!" Penny and Bernadette say together

"Those good time gals happen to be our wives!" Howard tells him.

"Come on ladies! I am going to go get a hundred changed into ones and then give it to Chippendale's dancer!" Amy says and she walks out of the lobby and the girls follow her Penny gives him a rude hand gesture as she walks out.

"That was unnecessary!" Sheldon exclaims "Jokes on her though, this is Vegas not Disneyland I hardly think that Chip and Dale are going to be here!"

"Should we tell him?" Ray whispers to Leonard.

"No, poor guys having a rough time already." Leonard says

"Leonard, your loosey goosey future wife better not lead Amy astray! I know how Penny operates!" Sheldon tells him as they walk toward the casino.

"I am going to tell him!" Leonard says and he jogs to catch up with Sheldon. "Hey buddy! Amy is not going out to find cartoon chipmunks, the Chippendale dancers are male strippers." Sheldon stops in his tracks and turns around.

"So Amy is going to stuff dollar bills down some oiled up muscle man's shorts while wearing a dress that displays her breasts to full affect?"

"Yes" The guys say in unison.

"Well that settles it! Gentlemen get ready for a night of debauchery that will be written in the history books! Well not really in the history books , I hardly three guys having weekend in Vegas is noteworthy in the annals of history but you get the point!" Sheldon says striding faster into pit of the casino and up to the bar.

"That's more like it! Guy's night out woop woop!" Raj says pumping his fists in the air. The guys all look at him and he lowers his fists. "You guys are no fun."

"What drink should I order that says I am a man and I do not care if my woman is out gallivanting around with strangers." Sheldon asks the bartender. The bartender makes him a drink and Sheldon downs it then walks to a black jack table.

"I heard this card game was easy."he tells the guys and they sit down at the table. After watching a few hands Sheldon places a bet which he wins and the whole table cheers. Sheldon plays a few more rounds winning each time and a crowd starts to gather around them. Leonard notices the pit bosses starting to look their way suspiciously.

"Sheldon"he hisses under his breath "Are you counting the cards? "

"Of course I am" Sheldon says back," before we came I read an interesting book on the practice. It really is not as hard as one would think no harder than winning at Ka'a."

"Sheldon, you can't do that! you are going to get us kicked out. Come one get your chips we are going."

The girls get back to their hotel room late that night, they say their goodnights and retreat into their own rooms. Amy feels miserable she had fun but she worried about Sheldon being mad at her all night. Amy walks into the the dark room turns on the light and is startled to see Sheldon sitting in one of the chairs he is drinking out of one of the tiny mini bar bottles of champagne. Amy stifles a scream she does not want to alarm Penny or Bernadette.

"Sheldon! what are you doing and how did you get in here?" Amy asks him and he gets out of the chair and wobbles towards her.

"Wouldn't you like to know! " he slurs tapping her on the nose. "I would like to know why you insist on driving me crazy." Amy sighs he is clearly three sheets to the wind and a drunk Sheldon is never fun.

"Sheldon you have been drinking, let me get you to bed and we can talk about it in the morning."

"No! we talk about it now! I already had to leave the casino because they accused me of counting cards I am not going to be kicked out of your room too!"

"Were you counting cards?" Amy asks him.

"Yes, I won a lot of money too, but that is not what I am here about."

"Sheldon, I do not know what you mean by saying I insist on driving you crazy, I thought we agreed on this weekend and that we were going to spend it with our friends."

"I did, but I did not go to a strip club and you did, Amy I have never felt like this about anyone and it made me very uncomfortable thinking about you being near another man dressed like that."

"If it makes you feel better , I will have you know that we did not go to a strip club. We saw a show, had some drinks, went dancing and came back to the hotel room."

"So I drank away my troubles for nothing?" Sheldon says throwing the little mini champagne he was holding in a trash can.

"Yes, so tell me how did you get in here?"

"I convinced the lady at the front desk to give me a key." Sheldon says dreamily and Amy gets the idea to take advantage of his forthcoming mood.

"Let me ask you something else ,that night you asked me to be your girlfriend, how did you get into my apartment?"

"That was more tricky, the night you got drunk and I took care of you ,I took your extra key." Sheldon tells her.

"That is not tricky that's just stealing." Amy laughs

"No no you misunderstand me ! I took it because if you were still sick in the morning I might have to come look after you. If you were too ill to come to the door I would need a way to open it. After that night I was going to return it to you but then I thought a key to your apartment might be handy in other situations as well. So I took the key to a hardware store got it copied and then returned the original to your apartment before you noticed it missing." Amy smiles, how could she have ever thought that she loved him more than he loved her even back then he was crazy for her.

"One last question, that night you made me sign the relationship agreement. I had only just agreed to be your girlfriend a couple hours previous not nearly long enough to draft a thirty-one page document. When did you draw that agreement up."

"I had been toying with the agreement ever since the night you took Leonard to the wedding. It made me so mad to think about you with another man I wanted to find a way to stop it from happening. Then it also scared me so much to announce that you were officially my girlfriend I did not know what to do."

"Officially …. interesting choice of words ."

"Amy, by now you have to know that I thought of you as my girlfriend way before I asked you. It was just that I did not realize it had to be stated officially until you started showing an interest in other men. That is why I freaked out tonight the thought of another man being with you is repellant to me." Sheldon looks like he might be sick and Amy can not decide if it is the thought of her with other men or the alcohol. "Amy my tummy hurts."

"Come on let's get you to the restroom." Amy guides him to the bathroom which is shared on the other side with Penny. Sheldon retches noisly into the toilet and Amy sits on the edge of the tub and pats his back.

"Amy!" Penny calls through the door "Are you OK, do you need me to come in there?"

"No! I am fine!" Amy calls not wanting let her know through no fault of her own she as already broken the no boys allowed rule. "I think it was something I ate, I will be fine!"

" Well if you need me let me know okay sweetie."

"Thanks Penny!" Amy calls, then she hauls Sheldon up and drags him back into the bedroom and sets him on the bed. Sheldon flops backward on the bed spread out like a starfish. Amy studies him she has to get him out of these clothes he got some sick on the jacket. With some effort she manages to haul him back up into a sitting position. She tugs his jacket off and throws it on the chair. Then she starts working on the buttons of his shirt. He looks up at her with a dopey expression on his face and holds his arms out obediently as she tugs his shirt off. She flops him back down on the bed and starts working on his belt and pants. Sheldon lifts his head up and smiles wide and starts cracking up.

"I do not see what is so funny about this" Amy grumps as she struggles to take off his pants and realizes they are stuck on his shoes.

"You just love to get me out of my pants!" he giggles

"Yeah well, there will be no hanky panky for you tonight you have been a very bad boy." Amy tells him finally relieving him of his pants and tossing them with the jacket he will be mad in the morning that she did not fold them neatly but she does not care. Amy unzips her dress and let's it fall Sheldon props himself up on his elbow watching her intently.

"You are very beautiful." he says "You almost gave me heart attack in that dress tonight." Amy smiles at him even as far as they have come he is never forthcoming with compliments.

"Flattery won't get you out of trouble Mister." Amy says pulling on her night shirt and walking over to him. Amy stands over him with her hands on her hips and he grins up at her like the cat who just ate the canary.

"If I have been bad maybe you should punish me?" he says suggestively and Amy swats his behind playfully.

"There you have been punished!" Amy says and she walks over to the light turns it out and crawls into bed. She lays there quietly for a moment then turns to him. "I love you Sheldon." but he his quiet and for a moment she worries that she might have offended him but then sees that he has just passed out. Amy sighs and a snuggles closer to his prone form wrapping her arms around him tight.

The next morning the guys go to Sheldon's to wake him up, they lost track of him last night but assumed that he has just gone to bed.

"Sheldon wake up we are going to go meet the girls for breakfast!" Leonard calls through the door there is no answer so he knocks loudly. "Come on buddy time to get up you will feel better with some food in you!"

"This is weird usually Sheldon is the first one awake and yelling at us to get up. He is like our own personal rooster." Raj says standing behind Leonard.

"Yeah I can think of other ways he is like a rooster too." Howard says drying his hair from the shower.

"I am going in" Leonard says and he bursts through the door only to find the room empty and the bed never slept in. "Oh my God! we lost Sheldon! Amy is going to kill me!" Leonard exclaims and he rushes to find his phone to call Sheldon's number. He dials the number and hears it ringing inside the hotel room he searches for it hoping maybe they just over looked him. Leonard finds it on the counter in the kitchen area along with his keys.

"Where do you think he went?" Raj asks "You don't think he got arrested last night!"

"Or kidnapped by mafia bosses." Howard says and when Leonard and Raj give him looks he shrugs his shoulders " Hey a man can dream can't he?"

"Let's go get the girls they can help us look!" Leonard says. The guys finish getting ready and head up to the girl's room. Leonard bangs on the door of their room and Penny answers it in her robe and does not look amused.

"We told you we would meet you downstairs! We are not even late yet!" Penny tells him.

"Is Amy awake yet?" Leonard asks her.

"No, but she was throwing up last night so she must have gotten more trashed than I thought. Funny I did not see her drink that much. Why do you ask?"

"We may have, sorta lost Sheldon last night." Leonard tells her.

"You lost Sheldon! Oh man! Amy is going to kill you! How did you lose him?" Bernadette says coming to the door.

"He told us he was going to bed, we were not ready to call it a night so we let him go."

"Did you try calling his phone?" Bernadette asks.

"Yes,he left it in our hotel room . Come on get dressed let's go look for him before Amy finds out that we lost him!" Leonard says anxiously.

"Hold on Scooby gang! I think I have this mystery solved!" Penny cries and walks over to Amy's door and swings it open. "Aha!" Penny yells and the gang walks over to the room. They see Sheldon in his underwear on top of the sheets and Amy underneath the sheets. They both walk up startled Sheldon falls off the bed trying to cover up with the sheet.

"You to crazy kids could not keep it in your pants for one night could you!" Penny says shaking her head at them.

"We were worried sick Sheldon! We thought you went missing!"Leonard says.

" Ummmmm." Sheldon stammers.

"It's not what it looks like!" Amy says " Now get out!" Penny shuts the door and covers her mouth giggling.

" You better go back downstairs and get him some clothes!" Penny tells him.

"Good thing he packs his clothes according to a schematic or I might never pick him out the right outfit!" Leonard sighs as he leaves to go get Sheldon's clothes.

The gang enjoys their time in Vegas but are happy to be home. Penny and Leonard say goodbye to Sheldon and Amy at their door and head upstairs. When she seed the couple is safely inside she turns to Leonard.

"Amy told me that Sheldon won a little bit of money before the pit bosses chased him off."

"You could say that." Leonard says nonchalantly.

"How much! Amy would not tell me, she says she was not proud of his ill gotten gains."

"Well it was somewhere in the neighborhood of a hundred grand." Leonard tells her and Penny slaps him hard.

"Shut your face! Do you know what kind of wedding you could have with money like that." Penny says.

"To be fair they do not even need the money for the wedding, Amy's mom has been saving for this day for forever." Leonard tells her.

"Wonder if they would shoot some I'll gotten gains our way?" Penny muses.

"We can have a very nice wedding on our budget." Leonard says stung.

"Oh sweetie! I was joking!" Penny tells him " and the funniest jokes are based on truth she mumbles under her breath.


	27. The Prenuptial Jitters

**It has taken me a while to post again but this was goint to be one chapeter and I wrote so much I had to split into three. Hope you enjoy the first act of the finale, again I own none of this.**

Upstairs in Penny's apartment the girls are giving Amy the spa treatment before her big day.

"You did not want all of this done professionally?" Bernadette asks Amy buffing one of her fingernails.

"No, I was never much of a girlie girl and those people in salons make me nervous. I always feel like they are talking behind my back." Amy tells her.

"Are you still worried that Sheldon is a flight risk?" Penny asks her

"Yes ,until I walk back up that aisle with him we are all on high alert. I told the guys they could use force if necessary! You too Penny if you see him trying to escape I give you permission to tackle him to the ground and hogtie him."

"Amy! I think if he was going to flee he would have done it by now!" Bernadette scolds her.

"I suppose you are right, you know I gave him an out the other night."

"What do you mean gave him an out?" Penny asks

"I told him to think long and hard about whether he wants to do this or not. That I would not be mad at him if he wanted to back out but if he was to do it while there was still time. I think I would die if I got left at the altar I just do not think I would ever recover from it." Amy starts crying her hands still have wet nail polish on them so Penny grabs a tissue a dabs Amy's eyes for her.

"Sweetie! Please I don't cry, you are going to make me cry! I really don't think he is going anywhere."

"How can you be so sure, he has fled in the past." Amy says

"That was different, he was scared and overwhelmed and he had no idea what the future held for him. I think he knows exactly what the future hold for him now and he is not scared anymore." Penny tells her patting her reassuringly.

"I hope you are right" Amy says fanning herself.

"Is there anything else you are worried about?" Bernadette asks her

"What am I not worried about! Amy moans " You know that the ring bearer is going to be a remote controlled R2-D2 right? What if it malfunctions and does not make it down the aisle? What is my family going to say when they see it or that we are being married by Wil Wheaton?

"I think having the wedding officiated by Wil Wheaton is pretty cool." Bernadette says

"Yes having your wedding not only attended but officiated by a minor celebrity is cool but Sheldon is insisting that he dress as his character in Star Trek

"Yeah Leonard is pretty jealous of those two items but being his best man he does get to control the robot." Penny says.

"You and Leonard are getting married in a month are you freaking out yet." Amy asks Penny.

"No, I am really chill about the whole thing, well except for the robot thing bearer I was not going to have that!" Penny says taking a big sip of wine.

"I am excited about your wedding Penny, I finally get to be maid of honor!" Bernadette says.

"Hey we all agreed it was fair that since I was maid of honor at your wedding, then Penny would be maid of honor at mine and you get to be MATRON of honor at hers!" Amy says.

"Please just call it maid of honor! Matron makes me think of Old spinster aunts!" Bernadette says.

"Technically spinster aunts would still be maids." Amy corrects her

The guys are downstairs sitting around eating takeout on the couch like old times.

"I can't believe you are getting married tomorrow." Leonard tells Sheldon.

"Yes that seems to be the thought of everyone at the university. Do you know that President Seibert asked me the other day if I was getting married to a woman or some virtual entity that I created." Sheldon says shaking his head.

"Yeah, he asked me something along the same lines." Howard agrees "Only he asked me if you were marrying some equation you had created."

"President Seibert seemed pretty shocked when I told him who my bride was. I believe is exact words were 'The monkey lady, she always seemed normal to me.' but I guess he does not know Amy that well"

"Because Amy is not normal?" Raj asks raising his eyebrow and Sheldon looks at him and scoffs.

"No because Amy abandoned her research on primates months ago, she has been more focused on sea cucumbers lately."

"Are you nervous?" Leonard asks him and Sheldon looks contemplative.

"Nervous about binding myself emotionally and legally to one woman for the rest of my life until death or divorce do us part?" Sheldon asks him and pauses

"Yes" Leonard says encouraging him to go on.

"I had not really thought about it, but I would say no. I gave the idea of marriage a lot of contemplation before asking Amy to enter into it with me ." Sheldon says.

"Good, Hey listen Sheldon I know that you are not big on giving or receiving gifts but the we all pooled together and got you something. Do not feel obligated to return the favor you have a free pass." Leonard says reaching around him and handing Sheldon a small gift bag.

"Oh I wish it were that simple, but you are in luck I happen to have groomsmen gifts for all of you. Amy told me that it was the social convention to do so. Whatever this is better be of equal or lesser value." Sheldon says opening up the bag and pulling out a small black box roughly the size of a ring box.

"I can say that I am flattered Leonard but I am already getting married tomorrow. To a woman."

"What? No! Open up the box." Leonard says and Sheldon opens up the box. Inside are silver cufflinks with blue number 73's on them. Sheldon looks genuinely touched as he picks one up and examines it."

"For good luck." Howard tells him.

"I know the old adage 'Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue' is usually for the bride but we thought these could be your something new and blue." Leonard tells him.

"I had them custom made, I don't want to brag but I have a cufflink guy." Raj says and Sheldon still has not said a thing.

"Do you like them?" Leonard nudges a little hurt they have not even received a thank you yet.

"Do I like them? It is a thoughtful and touching gift, yes thank you I like them very much." Sheldon says getting up. "Let me go and get what I purchased for you guys." Sheldon leaves the room and comes back with three small boxes and hand them out. The guys open them inside are tie pins with the X-men X on them.

"These are great, thank you Sheldon." Leonard says

"Yes thank you." Howard says.

"I thought they would be fitting tomorrow you guys will be my X-men and ensure I don't pass out while saying my vows. Once Amy's mother and my mother got involved in the guest list it became much longer than my hoped for forty six people and no children."

"Are you guys saying the traditional vows?" Raj asks.

"No, we wrote our own ,neither Amy or I thought it would be appropriate given that we are not getting married in a church. Also Amy refused to say that obey part and if you are not going to say it right just don't say it at all. "

"As Amy heard your vows yet?" Raj asks.

"No what kind of surprise would it be if she had read them already." Sheldon asks surprised.

"I am just surprised that she did not want final approval given your gift for saying inappropriate things." Leonard says.

"Inappropriate! I do not have a gift for saying inappropriate things, I think my vows are more than adequate. Amy's only request was that they not be written or spoke in Klingon. A request that I was able to honor easily."

"Can we see them?" Raj asks Sheldon contemplates the question

"No I want you to be surprised too." Sheldon says.

"Should we be worried." Howard murmurs to Leonard.

"Yes but it could be fun." Leonard whispers back.


	28. The One with the Wedding

The girls walk in to the hotel and Bernadette and Penny are in awe of its splendor.

"Amy this place is beautiful!" Penny cries.

"How did you pick this place out?" Bernadette asks.

"My mother did, apparently one of her hobbies was planning imaginary weddings for me. This was her plan B I thought her first plan was to ostentatious." Amy tells them as they walk through the grand lobby.

"More than this?" Penny asks a little jealous her wedding to Leonard is taking place at a ranch which is still very nice but nowhere near as grand as this. Although her mother had not been saving up for her wedding her entire life.

"Oh yes, I think getting married at the Chateau Marmont might have been overkill. The Westin in Pasadena is much more low key." Amy leads them to the dressing rooms where her mother is waiting for them to help her get ready.

"There you girls are!" Peggy says upon seeing them. "I have been her for hours making sure everything is set up properly."

"Mother the wedding is not for another hour and you hired people for that!" Amy says exasperated.

"What do I always say Amy?" Peggy asks her pursing her lips.

"Never trust others to do your work for you." Amy sighs

"That's right! Now let's get you ready!"

Mary peeks her head into Amy's dressing room she wants to see Amy before she walks down the aisle. Penny is putting the finishing touches on her makeup and Bernadette is fixing her hair. Mary steps into the room and Peggy rushes up to her.

"You have got to see her Mary! I do not think I have ever seen a more beautiful bride." Peggy says sniffing. Mary walks up behind Amy who is still facing the mirror.

"You look beautiful sugar!" Mary says smoothing Amy's hair down while looking at her reflection in the mirror.

"I can't stop crying!" Peggy says hugging Amy's shoulder.

"You like the way we did her makeup?" Penny asks. She knows she did an amazing job Amy's complexion is peaches and cream, her eyes look smoky yet natural.

"Lord honey! yes!" Mary crows. "Now I gotta get back out there and be with Shelly. I just could not resist sneaking a peek at my new daughter though!" Mary gives Amy one last squeeze and heads out of the door. Mary goes down the aisle of the venue the seats are already filled it is quite the turn out. Marys heart seizes up seeing her handsome son standing at the end of the aisle in his tux. Mary walks up to him and gives him a big hug he returns it awkwardly.

"You ready Shelly bean?" she asks him releasing him. "Amy is almost ready so we will be starting soon."

"Yes." Sheldon says simply

"You nervous about all the people here?" Mary asks him quietly and he shakes his head yes "Just remember what I used to tell you when you were little." Mary tells him and he shakes his head. "Now I got to go sit down now you are going to be just fine."

Sheldon watches Wil Wheaton coming down the the aisle dressed in his Star Trek outfit. He steps up to the podium and lightly touches his shoulder.

"You ready buddy we are starting."

"Yes" Sheldon says and be keeps his eyes cast downward he is feeling extremely nervous. Not about marrying Amy he knows that he wants to do that but he wishes that they could have just filed the appropriate paper work and be married without all the people here. Amy wanted a wedding and then his mom and her mom got involved the guest list snowballed out of control. Sheldon wonders if half the people are here because they did not believe he was actually getting married and wanted to witness a spectacle. Sheldon chances a glance into the crowd and his heart thumps against his chest. There are so many people he can barely make out faces he did not even know he knew so many people. He sees Kripke, President Seibert, and Janine Davis from work, then a few cousins he barely remembers. He tries to picture them all as Star Trek characters but the crowd is terrifying to him even then. He hears the music start and sees Leonard and Penny make their way down the aisle. He casts his eyes back downward ands counts as he hears Howard and Bernadette make their way down the aisle. The music changes again, the Star Wars theme played by a string quartet, and he hears the R2-D2 robot come down the aisle and rest in front of Leonard he hears laughter and smiles as much as Amy fought him on it he knew that would be a hit. The music changes again and be knows that it is time for Amy to walk down.

He chances a glance upwards willing his nerves to stay calm ,trying to picture the audience as a faceless mass. He sees her enter the doorway and is vaguely aware of Raj at her side walking her down. Amy never knew her father and seeing has they were one bridesmaid short he agreed to this job instead. Sheldon shouldn't have worried about fainting because the moment he locks eyes on her it feels like the air has been sucked out if his lungs, it is like tunnel vision. The room around him fades away and he feels like he is on an island and Amy is some beautiful ethereal creature floating up to him out of the sea. Never before could he remember seeing anything so beautiful. Sheldon knows he must be grinning like an idiot but he does not care. Today is the happiest he can ever remember being in his life. Who would have thought that a social construct he used to find so ridiculous would bring him so much happiness?

Amy and Raj come to rest in front of him, Amy is beaming back at him. She is wearing her glasses he likes that. There had been some arguments between Amy and her mother about whether she should remove them on the big day or not. Sheldon is glad she decided to keep them on she is beautiful and this way and she can still see.

"Who gives this woman away to be joined with this man?" Sheldon hears Will asks Raj

"Her Family, and her friends do." Raj says and he places Amy's hands into his. They face each other their hands linked together he looks down at her remembering the first time she held his hand. How the soft heat from her hand had seemed to spread through his body. He may have complained about holding hand in the past but today he grasps her hands tightly ,Amy is his anchor keeping him from floating away. The music stops and he hears Will clear his throat.

"Friends and family we are gathered here today today to witness the marriage of my good friend and former mortal enemy Dr. Sheldon Lee

Cooper to Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. Their love has been as interesting and unconventional as this wedding which has a Star wars ring bearer and a Star Trek officiant. Let me tell you though I have never met to people better suited to spend the rest of their lives together. I believe instead of the traditional vows the couple has prepared their own. Sheldon you're up."

"In lieu of the traditional vows pledging things to each other and whatnot I have prepared a small speech " Sheldon says clearing his throat.

Everyone holds their breath waiting what will come out of his mouth and hoping it is not completely crazy.

"It was not to long ago that I was at the wedding of my friend Howard to his wife Bernadette. I was asked to jointly officiate the wedding and in my speech I wished that they find as much happiness with each other as I had found alone. Some might find it hypocritical of me that I now stand before you today joining myself to another person. You see I always felt so alone in the world. No one ,as hard as they may have tried, ever understood me. I am smarter than most people and some take my wisdom for condescension. I have personality quirks that annoy most people. I never thought that I would meet another human that could make me feel like I was not alone. I was in denial then for I had already met that person. Amy you have stood by me through all my denials, and shown me that being with someone who truly loves and understands you is far better than being alone. Amy I love you and could not be happier to be starting the next chapter of my life with you by my side." Sheldon beams down at Amy and she smiles back up at him tears shining in her eyes.

"Amy have you prepared your vows to Sheldon." Will asks her Amy shakes herself out of her reverie.

"I never used to believe in romantic love, I thought it was something that would never happen to me. I thought love was for the other girls , the beautiful girls. I was one of those girls that never got looked at twice. The day I met you I knew I had found something special. You made me feel like I was one of those beautiful girls you offered to buy me a drink ,we sat and talked for a long time and I felt like I could have talked to you forever. Even though you asked for my number and said you would call on me the next day around three I was terrified that I would never hear from you again. My mother had strong armed me into these annual dates and they never ended well. If it progressed beyond introductions, it certainly never went as far as a second date. Yet I did ,true to your word you called me the next day at exactly three o clock and I do not think a day has gone by since then that I have not spoken to you . Sheldon you are my best friend, you understand me the way no one else ever had. I did not believe in love at our first meeting so I can not say it was love at first sight. Rather my love for you feels like a living thing with the capacity to grow and change. The last four years with you have been the best years of my life and I look forward to many more."

"Sheldon do you take Amy as your lawfully wedded wife?" Will asks him.

"I do" Sheldon says and Leonard maneuvers the robot over to him Sheldon takes the ring of the tray attached and slips it on her finger.

"Amy do you take Sheldon was your lawfully wedded husband?" Wil asks her.

"I do" and she takes Sheldon's ring of the tray and puts it on his finger.

"Then by the power invested in me by the state of California and the Starfleet Academy I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride!"

There is a hush in the room as Sheldon puts his hands Amy's waist. He leans in and kisses her chastely at first but it grows. Amy's lips shape around his perfectly in that moment it feels again like they are the only ones in the room. Until he hears a wolf whistle in the crowd and it brings him back to reality. Sheldon breaks the kiss and Amy giggles one of his favorite sounds in the world.

"Ladies, gentlemen, and robot, I now present to you the newly wedded Dr. and Dr. Cooper!" Will says and they spin around and face the audience Sheldon clasps Amy's hand tightly and holds up their intertwined hands. The music starts and they make their way down the aisle followed by the R2-D2 robot , then the other two pairs.

The reception is immediately afterwards in the ballroom so Amy and Sheldon take a small breather in the dressing room while the reception is being set up. Sheldon sits on the couch and Amy sits down beside him resting her head on his shoulder.

" I loved what you said during your vows." Amy tells him.

"I know" Sheldon says and Amy looks up at him and sees that he looks concerned

"What's wrong?" she asked him

"Do we have to do this reception?" Sheldon whines to Amy.

"Yes,but I promise you we can cut out early. There are people who want to congratulate us."

"OK but I am not looking forward to this at all."

"I told you I will shake everyone's hand so you do not have to." Amy tells

"Thank you, but it is not just that."

"We do not have to dance if you do not want to." Amy tells him trying to mask the sadness in her voice, she really wants to slow dance with him. She never got to go to her Prom it will be her first slow dance.

"No, I do not mind that part, besides if you don't make me dance my mother will. Amy you know how large gatherings make me uncomfortable, I just want to go back home." Sheldon tells her.

"I know, but it will all be over soon , one dance, cut the cake, hear the toast and then we are done!" Amy tells him sitting up and patting his knee. Just then the door opens up and Penny sticks her head in.

"Okay Dr. and Dr. Cooper! Its showtime!" The couple rises and follows Penny down the hallway they pause before the entrance into the ballroom. Sheldon takes a deep steadying breath before walking through the threshold with Amy.

"Ladies and gentlemen the newly married Dr. Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Amy Farrah Cooper!" the DJ announces the guests are all seated and they clap. "Now the first dance as husband and wife!" the DJ puts on a song that Sheldon does not recognize but he knows it is important to Amy.

Sheldon takes Amy's hand and leads her to the dance floor ,her stomach is filled with butterflies. They stop in the middle of the dance floor and Sheldon puts his hands gently on her waist and they start to sway to the music. Amy wraps her arms around him and rests her head on his chest and he lays his chin on the top of her head .Amy had been dreaming of this moment since she was a little girl when she would watch musicals with her mother. A handsome debonair gentleman sweeping her off her feet and dancing with her into the night. In high school she wanted so desperately to be asked to a dance she would slow dance around her room with her stuffed animals to this song. Amy wishes she could show her fourteen year old self a video of right now. A grown up Amy dressed in a beautiful dress looking, like a princess married to a brilliant and handsome doctor slow dancing in a ballroom.

"Amy what is this song?" Sheldon whispers in her hear

"I only have eyes for you by the Flamingos." she says back.

"I like it." he says and Amy lifts her up to look at him to make sure he is being serious. Sheldon looks down at her, he leans down and kisses her on the mouth and she feels herself melt into him. Amy does not care how many people are watching them right now and she is lost in the moment. Sheldon lightly tips her head back and coaxes her mouth open with his tongue. The world melts a way as they kiss and sway to the music she does not even hear it when the song changes until Sheldon breaks away making her feel bereft.

"Leonard wants to cut in." he tells her and she shakes her head OK her body still on fire from the dance and kiss.

Leonard steps up to her and swings her around the song is slightly faster. Yet Leonard's limited dance proficiency keeps it at a slow dance pace.

"You know." Leonard tells her "I did not think any of this was going to actually happen."

"I can be very persuasive when I want to be." Amy tells him laughing.

"I have never seen him look so happy." Leonard says spinning her around.

"Thank you." Amy says.

"It is true! I have known the man for almost a decade and this is the most I have ever seen him smile."

"You do not think he is faking it because he thinks that is how he should feel?" Amy asks him voicing the concern that had been nagging at her all night.

"No, if he were faking it you would know it, that smile is as quite unpleasant." Leonard tells her laughing.

"He must be in a good mood he is dancing with Penny." Amy remarks as she sees the pair awkwardly shuffling in the background.

"You know she has made him do a lot if things in the past but this is the first time she has ever gotten him to dance with her."

The music ends and the DJ announces that it is time to sit down and eat. After everyone is seated Leonard stands up and clinks his glass.

"As the best man I would like to make a toast to my best friend and until a couple months ago roommate. I never thought that this guy would get married before me. Hell I never thought this guy would ever show interest in a girl. I lived with him for years and the only things he cared about where science and comic books. Then Amy came into his life and answered the scientific principle what happens when an irresistible force mets an immoveable object? The object moves, maybe it is not blown away but slowly and surely it moves. Sheldon and Amy I am so happy that you found each other and I wish you many more years of happiness." Leonard sits down.

Raj gets up and clinks his glass to make a speech after Leonard is through.

"I might not actually be the father of the bride but I do feel it was my responsibility to give her away. I will explain you see I feel like I am the father of their relationship and their marriage is my baby." Everyone looks at Raj weird and the crowd is silent.

"That sounded weird and a little creepy but let me explain.I am going to tell you guys a little story about a dating website and a dirty sock. See when I first met Sheldon he had no interest in anybody outside of himself. I was desperately trying to find love anywhere and I had even dragged Sheldon along with me in my quest for love. While I was crushed time and time again here was this guy going about his life just fine. I thought to myself man I would love to see this guy affected by someone, something! Yet no matter who he met or who we introduced him too it made no impression on him. So I thought maybe if we we found this guy a female of his same species I could get him to feel something outside of himself. So without his knowledge or his consent I signed him up for a dating website and answered all the questions just like how he would answer them. The site that promises to use advanced mathematical algorithm to compute a perfect match ,spit out Amy Farrah Fowler with a perfect match score of almost an unheard of 99% match. If that score at been any lower I might not have pushed so hard but I have used it many times and never have I met anyone who matched so perfectly to me. So I devised a plan to get these two to meet even though he had no interest in meeting anyone. Howard and I tried reasoning with him, we tried begging him, and finally in a desperate last ditch effort I tried blackmailing him. I took a dirty sock from the roof top and hid it is his apartment telling him I would not remove it until he had gone with me to meet his perfect mate. Howard and I forced him into the car and drove him to a coffee shop. The whole time we drove he went on and on about what a fools errand this was, how he hoped we would be satisfied when he had proved us wrong. Amy,you proved us right that day. You said today that no one ever looked at you twice, but that day somebody did. Sheldon may not gave called you until the next day but he talked about you the whole way home. He wanted to call you on the ride home and we had to explain to him that with girls you had to play it cool and at least wait until the next day to call, which baffled him. I was there the next day when he counted down the exact seconds down to three so he could call you. You may not have believed then and it may have still been a long road for you two. It may have taken him a long time to admit it but I believe that on that day I witnessed love at first sight and it gives me hope." Raj says wiping a tear from his eye and Penny stands up.

"I promised myself I would not cry but after that I am having a hard time keeping that promise! OK these two screwballs are two of my best friends in the world. I have known Sheldon longer than Amy but now I can not picture them ever being apart. I was always and forever be digging the Shamy. Raj told you a story about a dirty sock and I am going to tell you a story about a tiara. The very tiara that is on Amy's head right now as a matter of fact." Amy smiles and touches the tiara on her head and Sheldon grasps her other hand and gives it a squeeze.

"Anyone close to Sheldon knows that gift giving is not his strong suit. I don't explain it as well as him but basically he thinks if you receive a gift you enter in a contract to give a gift back of equal or lesser value. I had known him for years and had given up trying to exchange Christmas or birthday gifts with him because it was just too exhausting. Then Amy enters his life and he asks me to help him find a gift for her. Another thing some of you might not know about Sheldon he does not really do apologies ,so this gift was his way of saying I am sorry. They had been fighting and he wanted to make it up to her so he plunked down a ton of cash on that tiara. Sheldon did not want or expect anything back from her to close the gift contract her forgiveness was enough. I know to outsiders that may sound shallow. Yet that is when I knew he was crazy for this girl. It is not what he bought or how much he spent but that she was able to affect him so much that he cared what she thought, that he needed to say he was sorry." Penny sits down and Leonard kisses her on the shoulder.

"I can't wait for our wedding." he whispers to her.

"Me neither." She says back.

The night goes on and lots of people stop by to share their congratulations with the couple.

"Congratulations Cooper." Kripke tells Sheldon. "To tell you the truth until I saw it with my own eyes I thought you were lying! I mean I know you told me about all the kinky sex stuff but, true love? You are a lucky man Sheldon and you are one crazy lady Amy." Kripke says walking away towards the dance floor.

"What kinky sex stuff is he talking about Sheldon?" Amy hisses at him and Sheldon looks at her wide eyed.

"Not the stuff we do now! I told him we had coitus before we ever actually did that is what he is referring to. I would never tell him about the true stuff we do now!" It is Amy's turn to stare at him wide eyed.

"Sheldon! why would you…." but before she can finish Stuart walks over to them.

"Hey guys, just wanted to stop by and tell you that I am happy for you. Even though you guys did not ask me to be part of the wedding and everyone else was."

"That's not true Stuart, Sheldon asked you to be an usher but you had to decline because you needed to be there for Mrs. Wolowitz." Amy tells him.

"No , no, I was just never asked but that is OK I am used to not being included. Besides what you said is true right now Debbie is signalling to me that she needs me." When Stuart walks away Amy asks Sheldon.

"Did you forget to ask him?"

"No, I never forget anything, eidetic memory, remember?" he says tapping the side of his head. " I just lied and said I asked him and then made up that extremely plausible excuse when you asked me about it."

"Why would you do that? I only asked you to ask him because he is your friend." Amy says.

"To be honest I did not like the thought of the man who tried to steal you away from me being an active part of our wedding." Sheldon tells her and Amy kisses him on the cheek.

"Stuart was never going to steal me away." Amy tells him.

"I know because technically we were not dating at the time." Sheldon says.

"No, even though you did not want to admit ,it I thought of you as my boyfriend even then. A man like Stuart could never captivate my interest for very long." Amy says.

"So that whole dalliance with Stuart was just a clever ruse on your part to get me to admit my feelings for you?" Amy taps her nose to indicate yes.

"Although Stuart was unaware of the part he played, I am sorry I might have broken the little sad sacks heart. It was necessary for me to achieve my goal."

"Amy Farrah Cooper you are a vixen!" Sheldon tells her looking at her and smiling.

"She sure is! I am glad to see she was not lying about having a boyfriend with an off putting personality! Dr. Sheldon Cooper who would have thought that is who you were dating? If you had told me I would not have believed you. Although you might want to tell your two friends that you are not a lesbian. " Sheldon looks up to see an extremely large homely man in a rumpled brown suit.

"I am sorry, who are you?" Sheldon asks him.

"I am Bert! Thank you for inviting me to your wedding the food is amazing!" he says.

"Actually Bert I was not aware that I did invite you to my wedding." Amy tells him.

"Oh yeah, I came has Professor Johnson's plus one." Bert says indicating another table. "Well got to go!" Bert says and shuffles off.

"He never answered my question, who is this Bert character?" Sheldon asks Amy.

"Oh, he is a geologist at the university, he had kind of a crush on me last year when I first started there. He would bring me pretty rocks and he asked me out to a mineral and rock show. He would not accept no for an answer even when I told him I had a boyfriend. So I asked Raj and Howard to help me put him down easy, which I guess in their books means tell him I am a lesbian!" Amy explains.

"Just one more reason to hate Geology and the people who study it! I guess I should not have been worried about Stuart it is obvious that you are going to leave me for that King Kong sized gravel monkey!" Amy looks at him shocked and he looks serious until he breaks and smiles.

"Bazinga! I clearly best that man in all departments." Amy smacks him affectionately on the shoulder.

By the time they cut the cake they are both exhausted and make their excuses to leave. The crowd gathers to wish them well and good night ,as they make their way down the steps of the hotel they toss dried flower petals at the couple. They get into Amy's car and she drives them back home, it is there for now and then a plane in the morning for their honeymoon.


	29. Feels like the first time

**I feel like my brain made a baby in the last chapter and there is no way to top it. So here in anticlimatic news is their first night as a married couple. Again I own none of this! Also any suggestions for follow-up chapters would be appriecated**

"No Sheldon! There is no way that I am going to let you even attempt it!" Amy tells him as they walk up the stairs of the apartment.

"Amy I am stronger than I appear, it was already enough that you had to drive us away from the wedding let me carry you through the threshold."

"Sheldon that is a wedding traditional rarely followed anymore of all the things you chose not to adhere to why are you so insistent on this?" Amy asks as they round the landing and stop in front if their doorway.

"Please." he begs giving her puppy dog eyes.

"Fine! I give up! but if you throw your back out and we have to cancel our honeymoon plans you will have only yourself to blame." Amy tells him as he unlocks the door.

"Thank you." Then Sheldon stares at her sizing her up and grabs her by the shoulders and wraps her arms around his neck. Then he swings her legs up and distributes her weight between both arms. Sheldon staggers a few steps forward then plops her unceremoniously on the couch. "There was that so difficult?" he wheezes slightly out of breath.

"Apparently it was, but you put in a valiant effort." Amy tells him standing up. "I am going to slip into something a little more comfortable." Amy tells him she is still in her wedding dress.

"Fine." Sheldon says removing his jacket and collapsing on the couch he loosens his tie and unbuttons his shirt. He knows Amy will expect coitus tonight but he is pretty tired now. Sheldon closes his eyes and he must drift off for a minute because when he opens he thinks he sees a ghost standing in front of him and yelps.

"Come on Sheldon let's get you to bed." Amy says tenderly tugging him up. His eyes adjust and he realizes the ghost is just Amy an a filmy white nightgown. He follows her down the hall and watching the way her body moves under the nightgown wakes him up a bit. Amy opens the door to the bedroom takes his hand and leads him inside.

"Let's get you out of these clothes and into your pajamas." She says taking off his tie and then unbuttoning the shirt the rest of the way. Sheldon leans down to kiss her as she removes his shirt and she stiffens.

"What's wrong?" he asks her, he hopes he did not make her mad somehow.

"We don't have to tonight, I know you are tired. " Amy tells him kissing his cheek

"Well the sight of you in this nightgown as made me feel quite awake." he tells her rubbing the thin material of the nightgown between his fingers.

"You like it? Bernadette got it for me for our wedding night it is called a peignoir." Amy says twirling a bit to show it to him from all angles.

"I like it you look the part of the virginal bride in it." he tells her but he detects a slight shift in her mood at that statement.

"Sheldon, do you sometimes wish we had waited til our wedding night for coitus." Amy asks him

"Is that what's bothering you?" he asks her

"A little, its just that I used to think that actually marrying you was the least attainable thing in the world. Had I known that you would marry me I might have waited. I mean waited until my thirties I could have waited longer." Amy tells him.

"You know what's odd I entertained the idea of marrying you much earlier than the idea we would have coitus." he tells her guiding her over to the bed. Sheldon takes of his pants and sits down in the bed in his underwear. They lay down on the bed together and Sheldon wraps his arms around her. Amy snuggles her face into his chest inhaling his scent.

"When is the first time you thought about marrying me." she asks him.

"Well let's see do you want to know the first time I thought about it or the first time I seriously considered it?" he asks.

"For data gathering purposes let's go with both." Amy says.

"The first time I ever thought about it was the night of our first date. Penny told me she would tell my mother on me if I tried to make a test tube baby with you. Pointing out the fact that my mother would not like a baby born out of wedlock. Later that night as I lay in bed I thought well maybe I will marry Amy. Then I thought about trains and then I thought about an article I had read and the notion left my head. The first time I really thought I am going to marry that girl was when I started drafting the relationship agreement. I thought if I was going through all this trouble I might as well marry you. I knew then I would never want any other woman but you."

"What stopped you then?" Amy asks.

"I knew to make the marriage legal that we would have to consummate the relationship. The thought of that back then sent me in to panic mode."

"Well I am glad you changed your mind." Amy says lifting her head up to look at him.

Sheldon hitches on of her legs around his waist and pulls her around so that she is straddling him. He does not normally like this position it makes him feel like he's not in control. Sheldon runs his hands along her legs and up to her waist. The sensation of his warm hands sliding over the cool silk of the material is sending her into sensory overload.

"What are you doing?" she asks him

"Just admiring my wife" he says his voice husky. " You know with every other person I find touching repellant. Just having to shake hands with another person makes me cringe. Yet with you I crave to touch and be touched. At first it was a paradox I wanted so badly to have that intimacy but the thought scared me so much I could not do it. " As he talks lets his hands rove freely over her body over her nightgown. Amy steadies herself by planting both of her hands on his chest he is still wearing his undershirt. "When did you change your mind?" he asks her suddenly snapping her out of the spell he was putting her under.

"Change my mind about what? Amy asks.

" About all of this,you started pressuring me about it way before I consented to your wishes. I seem to remember you telling me coitus was off the table when we first met." he shifts upwards so that they are both sitting up facing each other her legs wrapped around his waist.

"It happened so gradually I cannot pinpoint the exact moment that I changed my mind, I don't have a memory like yours. Although I remember the first time I held your hand I lied and said I felt nothing, but really I felt tingly all over. I remember one night I was over at your apartment and you were talking about one of your space movies describing the plot to me in great detail.I was bored out of my mind but I could have cared less about what you were saying. All I could do was watch your mouth as you talked and wonder how it would feel if I pressed mine against it."

"Then you did just that." he says quietly.

"Yes, I still get embarrassed about our first kiss."

"Why?"

"Because I was drunk and I threw myself at you. You did not want it and you did not like it."

"Oh I liked it, Amy I am going to make you understand how much I enjoyed it." He tells her and then he kiss her softly on the mouth and trails light kisses down to her neck. "Shall I give you a hickey to prove we are a couple?" he asks nipping her neck lightly.

"I think the ring on my finger is sufficient." Amy says tilting her head back to give him better access. Sheldon's mouth kisses and bites around her neck and his hands glide around her body. Amy breaks away and he looks stunned until she kisses him. Amy mirrors Sheldons actions and kisses her way down his long graceful neck. Amy bites him a little harder than she meant to but he does not seem to mind so she continues. Amy runs her hands up the inside of his shirt relishing the feeling of his bare skin. Amy finally has all she ever wanted thinking about how far they have come together and knowing that almost chokes her up. There first night together had been so different from this, they had both been so nervous and unsure what to do. It had not been the way she had always imagined it being. Reading to many romance novels had ruined her.

The first time was not the love making she had always wanted, it was awkward and oddly mechanical, insert A into slot B. Time had gone on though and as Sheldon began to enjoy himself more it got better. Like any subject that he found himself liking he immersed himself into research the topic. Sheldon read many books on the subject and would sometimes write notes after their sessions. Still she would not have described their dalliances as making love, more like the best research project she had ever worked on. Tonight though was different, it was slow unhurried, he was letting her take the reigns. It feels different somehow like they are showing each other how much they love each other with each caress. This is making love Amy thinks and even though it is not there first time in bed it is their first time making love.

Afterwards Amy lays her head on his chest feeling spent and pleasantly achy. Amy has a question that has been nagging at her for a while. Sheldon is in a good mood and it seems as good of a time as any to ask it.

"Sheldon are you awake?" Amy asks

"Yes but we should be asleep, it us nearly midnight and we have to catch a plane in the morning." Sheldon

"Can I ask you a question? then I promise I will go to sleep." Amy says

"Go ahead ask away."

"OK it is a little embarrassing to ask, but I have been wondering about it for awhile." Amy pauses unsure how to phrase her question.

"Go on" Sheldon says.

"If you were never sexually attracted to anyone before me, does that mean you were never… how do I phrase this? Aroused by anything before me?"

"I think what you are trying to ask me is did I get erections before you came into my life?"

"I was trying not to ask so crudely but yes that is what I was getting at."

"I must say that after our love making I would think you would tire of dirty talk." Sheldon says slightly shocked.

"Your right, I am sorry I asked just forget about it." Amy says looking up at him.

"No, it is fine I will answer you, Amy I am a man. I had fully functional genitals before I met you. I used to think of them as an inconvenience, an involuntary response that proved my body could fail me. It would happen when I got excited about something and stay until I willed them away. I once or twice tried to manually alleviate the problem but it seemed like pointless self abuse, and an awful lot of touching. It was not until I met you though that I got the urge to act on them." he tells her sighing.

"I know that was difficult for you thank you for being open with me Sometimes the biologist inside gets the better of me."

"Now go to sleep, we leave in the morning." Sheldon chides her and she drifts off to sleep .


	30. The Honeymooners

"So I guess Sheldon and Amy have probably arrived in Switzerland by now." Penny remarks to Leonard handing him a cup of coffee.

"Yeah at least someone will finally get to have a romantic trip to see the Large Hadron Collider. I should have held my breath and insisted that he take me along too and see how he liked it." Leonard tells her and Penny laughs.

"Yeah but then Amy would be mad when he said you could come along and bought you a plane ticket." Penny says.

"Oh you are thinking of a couple years ago Sheldon. I am pretty sure Sheldon 2.0 would not be happy if I crashed his honeymoon. You know the other day he said that he hoped that the compartment doors on the train were not glass because he was eager to have coitus with Amy on a train." Leonard says looking grossed out.

"Really he said that?" Penny says wrinkling her nose.

"Yes, it is still hard for me to hear him say stuff like that. It is creepy like when they dub an adults voice over baby's to make it seem like they are talking."

"A train trip all over Europe, Sheldon knows how to get what he wants doesn't he?" Penny says

"It was Amy's idea to go to Europe."Leonard tells her

"Amy wanted to go to Paris, just Paris… did you know that she is fluent in French?"

"Yes, and Sheldon thinks he is fluent but I have my doubt's about it."

"Why?"

"Well he thinks he is fluent in about eight languages but really he can just annoy people of all nationalities." Penny laughs and takes a sip of her coffee.

"I can't wait til our honeymoon! It will be one that we can both enjoy!" Penny tells him.

"That reminds me I need to go on the hunt for SPF level vampire." Leonard jokes.

"Hey you thought Cancun was a great idea."

"No I agreed that a week with you in nothing but a bikini was a great idea." Penny gives him a look but laughs.

"I must say Sheldon the Large Hadron Collider was fascinating I am glad we started our journey there." Amy tells Sheldon as they board their train.

"It has always been a dream of mine to come to see it, and tomorrow we get to see the Curie museum in Paris." Sheldon says excited

"There is so much to see in Paris it is a shame that we will only be there two days." Amy says

"I know you wanted to spend the whole trip there but just think this way we get to see the Deutsches Museum in Munich and The Galileo museum in Florence, not to mention ride a cool train the entire time."

"Yes I much rather be in a tiny train compartment then in a spacious hotel room enjoying all the amenities of a five star hotel." Amy says sarcastically but Sheldon misses it.

"We are traveling first class so we won't have to share the compartment with anyone else."

"That's good, sharing our honeymoon with a bunch of college students trekking all over Europe might have taken some of the romance out of it." Amy tells him and Sheldon ignores her.

"The best thing about our sleeping compartment is that it locks, so we won't be robbed in the middle of the night or violated my marauders."

"That's comforting thought." Amy tells him rolling her eyes.

"It is! Additionally we won't be disturbed when we engage in coitus." Amy looks at him with her eyes widened and smiles at him.

The next morning they arrive in Paris and spend the day visiting the museums and sight seeing. They check into their hotel room that afternoon both exhilarated and exhausted.

"Paris really is amazing I can see why they call it the city of love." Amy tells him kissing him on the cheek.

"I still don't see that, Paris as just as much a history of war and violence as any city. They were very fond of public beheading, that does not show much love." Sheldon says matter of factly sinking into one of the chairs in their room. "What does show love is how you saved me from a lunch of jellied calves brain."

"I do not think you are as fluent in French as you thought you were anyhow ,just remember pommes frites and should be able to dine comfortably." Amy tells him.

"You are more adventurous in your dining." Sheldon remarks.

"Yes before I met you I watched a lot of food network, I think if I hadn't become a biologist I might have been a chef."Amy tells him and he looks at her oddly.

" A chef? Isn't that a little below your IQ level to even consider?"

"Well cooking takes a lot of the same basic principles that we use in science. In a lot of ways being a chef is kind of like being a culinary chemist."

"A culinary chemist, that is adorable , I still think though I will stick to my comfort zone and only order what I know."

"It is a shame to be in a city world famous for its cuisine and just eat hamburgers and French fries."

"What better place to eat a French fry than in the country of its namesake. Although it is amusing to note that they do not originate from France they are actually from Belgium."

"That is interesting but somehow Belgium fries does not carry the same weight. Now team Belgium with waffles and you really have something." Amy says laughing at her own joke.

"Now what's amusing about that is what we think of has Belgium waffles actually originated in America by a man from Belgium." Sheldon tells her.

"Well now that we are all caught up on our food origin history I am going to wash up before we head back out tonight."

"Hang on! Head back out! I thought we were done for the day." Sheldon says shocked.

"Sheldon! Paris is called the City of Lights for a reason! It is part of the experience to walk around the city at night. What did you expect we would do it is only four o clock in the afternoon."

"City of love! City of lights if you ask me Paris needs to choose a nickname and stick with it. For your information it is actually it is named " The City of Light" because it was the center for new ideas and advancement education during the Age of Enlightenment; many of those sights we have already taken in today." Amy crosses her arms and looks annoyed but says nothing.

"Although you could say it was also named city of light because it was the first city to have functioning gaslights on its streets. As to your question as what I thought we would do I thought we would relax, order room service, and see what movies pay per view has to offer, and then go to bed."

"Again thank you for the unsolicited education Sheldon." Then Amy decides to change tactics and sits on the edge of his chair and starts rubbing his shoulders. "Sheldon I want to see the city at night, all the lights lit up . Plus we still have not seen the Eiffel Tower yet." Amy wheedles.

"I want to see the Eiffel Tower during the day so you can take a picture of me using force prospective making it appear like I am holding it in my hand." Sheldon shrugs out of her hands and holds out his hand to demonstrate what he means and gives her a cheesy smile. Amy does not return the smile and goes into the bedroom. Sheldon looks at the shut door and sighs then he digs out his IPad to call Leonard.

"Hey Buddy! How is the honeymoon going?I was not expecting to hear from you do soon." Leonard says.

"Oh just fine." he sighs

"Uh-oh" he hears Penny say in the background " What did you do this time?"

"We have already seen the Large Hadron Collider, The Curie Museum and The Louvre. Then I merely suggest that we spend the night in the hotel resting up and she gets all upset and says she wants to walk around the city at night. At night Leonard who knows what kind of ruffians roam the streets after dark."

"Paris is the city of lights! Of course Amy wants to experience it I think you should just do it." Leonard tells him.

"First of all since I have already explained this to Amy I suggest you google why Paris is called the city of light. Secondly why do you never take my side Leonard?"

"Sheldon do you remember what I told you the night before your wedding?" Penny chimes in.

"Of course you told me and I quote; Amy is the best thing that has ever and will ever happen to you and if you hurt her or make her sad I will hunt you down and make you pay."

"Damn straight!" Penny says.

"I am not hurting her! I just want to stay in tonight!"

"Amy has been waiting her whole life to go to Paris! And she finally his there with the man of her dreams! You will not treat this entire honeymoon like a school field trip."

"School field trip! I will have you know we have copulated four times already ,once on a train! I do not know what kind of school field trips you went on." Sheldon says huffily

"To begin with eww! I do not need to hear about your sex life. For your information I had at least one school field trip that involved copulation."

"Wait, what?" Leonard says to her.

"Oh come on Leonard I told you about the senior trip to six flags."

"Oh yeah, that's when you list never have I ever with the question have you ever on a roller coaster."

"Eww, and you say you don't want to hear about mine." Sheldon says.

"Anyway, you need to do what Amy wants to do and not bitch about it! Now go be with your wife!" Penny says hanging up.

Sheldon sits in the chair and rubs his temples and thinks. He supposes Penny is correct and he should go along with Amy's wishes. A little stroll could not hurt anything even though his feet were killing him from all the walking they had already done. Then idea occurs to him that he thinks might make both of them happy in the gets up and goes to the bedroom Amy is still in the bathroom. He sits on the bed and waits for her to emerge and when she does she is wrapped in a towel looking distractingly alluring.

"C'est parti pour une promenade." Sheldon says in slow halting French.

"Vous semblez avoir eu un changement de coer." Amy says effortlessly.

"We are going to have to switch to English because I did not did not understand a word of that." Sheldon tells her.

"Are you sure because you trying to speak French with your Texas twang is incredibly sexy." Amy tells him.

"I do not have a Texas twang! I have spent years cultivating my non regional diction." Sheldon pouts.

"Oh and it shows it only come out on certain words in this case promenade." Amy tries to imitate the way he said it and Sheldon gives her a look. "Oh don't get upset."Amy walks over to him and bends down to kiss him on the puts his hands around her waist and tugs her downward making her fall on top of him. He leans back so that she is laying across his body she struggles to get up but he holds her tight.

"Sheldon let me up I am all wet." Amy says laughing still struggling against him.

"I am counting on that." Sheldon tells flushes and looks up him surprised. It is not like him to start with the dirty talk and she likes it. Amy stops struggling momentarily ,he takes advantage and flips her onto her back. He covers her body with his balancing his weight on forearms that are framing her face. He leans down and kisses her tortuously slow, Amy wants to pull his face closer to hers , to deepen the kiss but her arms are pinned by her side. The towel has fallen off and her body feels electrically charged has her exposed flesh rubs against his clothed body. She feels his excitement press against her sensitive parts and she tries to buck up against him to gain some welcome friction. Sheldon shakes his head no against her mouth, he gives her one last deep kiss that turns her into jelly then gets up. Leaving her flushed and bothered on the bed and walks away.

"Where are you going?" Amy asks him breathless

"To shower and get ready for our walk." Sheldon says and he walks into the bathroom. Amy lies there feeling confused, should she follow him in the bathroom is that what he wants. The time he did that with her it was incredibly sexy ,but suddenly she feels too shy to act on it. Maybe she wants her to wait for him to come out and still be in this position. Screw the walk she thinks, now she just wants him. Then she comes to the realization that is what he wants. For her to become so distracted with sex that she forgets all about the walk. Two can play at that game she thinks and gets up to get dressed. Besides she has had a lot more practice dealing with sexual frustration than he has. Amy gets off the bed and gets dressed in her favorite black dress, her lilac cardigan, no nylons, and her yellow pumps. Amy leaves the room she sits in the chair Sheldon previously occupied and starts to read a book on her iPad. Trying to distract herself from thoughts of what had just occurred.

A short while later Sheldon exits the bedroom he is dressed nicely gray slacks and a button down almost the exact shade of her sweater. Amy laughs to herself they had started doing that more and more, dress complimentary to one another without any discussion beforehand. Amy would never point it out to him for fear that he would throw out any shirt that matched any of hers.

"Shall we go?" Amy asks him and she can tell be his expression that he is surprised that he was not able to sway her. You're good Dr. Cooper but I am better Amy thinks.

"Yes let's get this over with" Sheldon sighs holding out his arm to her in a gentlemanly gesture.

Walking around Paris at night, Amy thought how easy it was to feel transported to some other time. With her arm linked around his it felt like they could be some turn of the century couple courting each other. Amy had often imagined herself living in another era. Amy always felt perhaps that she had been born in the wrong time. When she used to read Jane Austen she would imagine herself in that time where if a woman had never been with a man and choose to spend her time quilting she was celebrated not ostracized. Then she met Sheldon and thought their relationship had started out very much like a courtship of old. There had been chaperoned dates, talking over tea, walks around town on the pretext of exercise but really to talk freely to one another without Leonard's prying ears.

Amy thought Sheldon looked like a gentleman, she liked to imagine him into her books. In many ways he was very much like Mr. Darcy, arrogant, socially awkward, handsome. Amy had fantasized about him in that role many times. One particularly saucy fantasy involving him wearing a morning suit and herself corset he is eager to unlace.

Amy looks up at him and is overcome with love, she grabs her hand and gives it a gentle squeeze. His hands have always attracted her, their long fine boned structure. They were elegant, graceful, the hands of a piano player, Amy always wondered how a child prodigy like him got away without learning how to play an instrument. She must have a goofy expression on her face because Sheldon looks at her gives her a half smile and asks.

"Are you alright?"

" I was just thinking why don't you play an instrument? You have the perfect hands for piano playing. As a child prodigy surely there was pressure for you to take up one. "

"You are not the first person to note that." Sheldon tells her " I guess I do have the lily white hands of a gentleman that are often associated with playing the piano. My mother did attempt to get me to learn to play and arranged for lesson at this old woman's house. Mrs. Baxter she was a horrible woman who smelled like to much perfume and mothballs. Her house was no better she was rather fond of cats I was very allergic. I hated going over there. Then she rapped me on the knuckles when I messed up a part and I got up left and never came back."

"Your mother did not force you too go?"

"Oh my mother learned early on there was no forcing me to do anything that I did not want to do. Mary Cooper learned to suggest, manipulate, and beg to get what she wanted out of me. Once I have denounced something though it is for life." Sheldon tells her, and Amy thinks that that is another quality he shares with Darcy.

"I wish my mom gave up that easily, she forced me through every type if lesson you can imagine. Harp, ballet, tap, French,." Amy ticks them off with her free hand.

"Well all those lessons they paid off didn't they? You play the harp, you are fluent in French. The few times I have danced with you you seemed very proficient." Sheldon tells her.

"Oh but I hated dance all the other girls made fun of me because I was not graceful or beautiful. Thank goodness she finally realized I was never going to be a prima ballerina and let me quit before middle school, that era of my life was hard enough without adding world's most klutzy ballerina to it."

"It is true that I have a hard time imaging you pirouetting across the stage. I think you make a much sexier scientist than you ever would a dancer." Amy looks at him pleased and knocks into him with her shoulder.

"Still I do not think if we ever have a child I would put he or she through those endless lessons. If they want to learn how to play an instrument that is fine with me and I will provide them with lessons. I will not force a child to while away their childhood indoors mastering the Harp." Sheldon looks down at her with a serious expression on his face.

"You think about us having progeny?" he asks her and Amy backpedals they are having such a magical evening she does not want to ruin it with Sheldon freaking out over hypothetical offspring.

"Sometimes you know in an abstract way, more of an if we ever then a when we do."

"I think about it too sometimes." he admits his expression softening.

"You do?"

"Yes, I can picture you your womb full with our child. A child for all intents and purposes could be one of the great minds of our day. I mean the genetic cocktail of both of our DNA seems rich with potential for excellence. If it were to be a boy I would name him Sheldon Jr. and he could be my protégée in ever way."

"What if was a girl?" Amy asks pleased that the conversation has turned out this way.

"Then you can name her and she can be your protégée and then we will try again in three years for male progeny."

"What if the second one is a girl too?" Amy asks curiously

"Ah well we just declare the whole thing a wash and abort the mission." Sheldon tells her. Amy can tell that he is being serious but she tries not to get too offended. She has been able to change his mind about a number of things in the past. Amy is sure he won't be so dismissive if and when a child were to come female or not.

They walk the streets for a while longer they are teeming with life but they are in their own private bubble. The city really is beautiful at night with all the street lights and tiny cafes. It feels like they are walking in a painting, something this wonderful could not possibly be real life. They stop at one of the cafes to eat dinner then afterwards head back to the hotel. They could have taken a taxi to get closer to the Eiffel tower but Amy is starting to regret her choice in shoes. They get back to the hotel room and Amy immediately takes off her shoes.

"I could have told you that those were a poor choice of shoes for walking around cobblestone streets in. I knew what you were trying to do so I figured I would let you suffer." Amy glares at him.

"What exactly do you think I was trying to do?" Amy asks him

"Entice me sexually by dressing in that manner." Sheldon says unbuttoning the the top couple of buttons on his shirt.

"Is that worse than what you were trying to do?" Amy asks him arching her eyebrows.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." Sheldon sniffing.

"So you were not trying to manipulate me with sex to get me to do what you wanted?" Amy says.

"Well it didn't work so clearly the answer is no." Sheldon tells her and Amy walks over to him and stands on her tiptoes to kiss him on the mouth.

"It worked , I'm just too smart to fall for your tricks." Amy says patting him gently on the behind and sauntering off to the bedroom. Sheldon follows her in and grabs her by the shoulders and spins her around to face him.

"You think you are smarter than me Dr. Cooper?" He asks her his voice seems to have a slight edge. Amy opens her mouth to refute him but then he leans in close to her and whispers in her ear his voice sensually low his breath a soft caress. "You want to know a secret, sometimes I think you are right." Amy is to shocked to reply but couldn't if she wanted to because then his mouth crushes over hers.

Sheldon's hands roam over her body eager to seek flesh he runs his hands under her dress and up her bare legs. Amy's hands are just as eager and she practically rips the buttons of his shirt in her haste to remove it. Sheldon walks her backward towards the bed and gently pushes her onto it. Amy takes off her sweater and pulls off her dress. She lays on the bed in her underwear practically panting has he removes the last vestiges of his clothing and climbs into bed beside her. After the initial fervor now he seems shy again and Amy takes the reigns, he is not going to run away from her this time. Amy kisses him softly and let's her hand roam downward she feels him gasp against her mouth has her hand finds its target. Sheldon let's his hands wander and he let's them settle on her breasts his hands testing and teasing them. Amy breaks away to help him remove her bra but Sheldon rolls her into her back and settles between her legs removing her panties and touching her tentatively at the apex between her thigh's. Amy bites her lip the keep from crying out has his fingers make circles in the right places. When he removes his hand Amy whimpers but she is rewarded with its replacement. They make love until they are both sated and fall asleep still unclothed in each others arms.

The rest of the honeymoon passes in much the same fashion another city, another museum, another night falling into each others arms. The days pass quickly and before they know it it is time to get on the plane and head back home.

"This trip was amazing it be will hard to adjust to being home again." Amy tells him as they wait for takeoff.

"I don't know, I feel quite renewed like I am ready to start my research again refreshed. This is the way I hoped I would feel after my first train trip." Sheldon tells her.

"Maybe it was visiting all those centers of science, they gave you a renewed sense of purpose." Amy tells him.

"Maybe." Sheldon says but he knows that is not it, it was having her by his side. Having her has a collaborator on his ideas, a partner in crime on his expeditions. With Amy by his side he feels like he can take on any challenge and he can't wait to get back home to prove it.


	31. The Nobel Aquisition

**Ok This is the last chapter and I have so many feels . When I started writing this it was just for myself I just posted it as a goof. The overwhelming positive response has really made me feel great. I thinking of putting in an epilogue just to round everything out so let me know what you think.**

The girls are all at Penny and Leonard's apartment for a long over due girls night. Amy has been back from her honeymoon for a week but with all the settling back in and catching up at work she has not had much time to relax. Penny is getting married in a week and the girls are using the night to catch up before the big day. Amy has brought all the pictures from her honeymoon and she and Bernadette are poring over the photos. Penny is bored, the pictures are mostly of boring science museum stuff and Bernadette is asking a million questions that she does not understand. The only question Penny had for her was how was the shopping in Paris to which Amy looked puzzled and replied that they had bought Sheldon some stomach medication at an apothecary. Leave it to Amy not to buy a single thing in a city renound for its shopping. Penny tries not to look to bored but Amy must be able to tell.

"Hey Penny why don't you look at the pictures on my IPad ? The ones I printed out are mostly of the sight seeing in the museums that we did. I want to show Bernadette some of the interesting things I saw at some of the science centers. The ones on my IPad I synced from mine and Sheldons phones so they are a little more candid."

Penny doubt's she will find these pictures more interesting but she is a good friend so she picks it up and starts scrolling through pictures. They are a lot of the same thing she has already seen. Photos of that collider thingy, photos of trains, for honeymooners there aren't many pictures of them. Then she sees one that makes her smile Sheldon in his signature beige windbreaker pointing at a writing on the side of the train grinning ear to ear. She could count the times she had seen the man smile on one hand before he met Amy now it seemed like he smiled all the time. Then there is another one that makes her giggle it is a selfie Sheldon must have taken. The two of them in what must be their sleeper car, Amy is on the top bunk hanging her head upside down her long dark hair fanned out, Sheldon's face close to hers. They look like kids excited for their first night of sleep away camp. Penny scrolls through a few more that are boring and she is about to put it down when she comes to one that piques her interest.

This one is definitely one that Amy took, it is of Sheldon sound asleep. Penny feels voyeuristic looking at it, it was obviously meant to be private. Yet several things about it interest her, the first being he his shirtless and just a sheet covers him from the waist down. Penny in all the time she has spent with him has never seen him without long sleeves. When she first met him she asked Leonard about it. Long sleeves all summer in sunny southern California. Penny thought at first maybe he was disfigured in some way or had gotten some ill conceived tattoo that he wanted hidden. Leonard had laughed at her 'Yeah Sheldon who has to be put to sleep to get a shot, has a tattoo sleeve'. Sure enough the proof was here no scars, no tattoos. The other thing that intrigued her was how at peace he looked, she had seen him asleep before, he slept like a Dracula flat on his back arms folded, expression stern like he was uncomfortable even in sleep. In this picture he is on his stomach his head resting on his arm, a sleepy smile on his face. Penny feels gross for thinking it but she can see why Amy describes him as sexy in this picture.

"Penny did you hear what I just said?" she hears Amy ask. Penny snaps her head up and hastily scrolls past the offending photo. Thankfully it lands on one of the two of them together. Sheldon has his arm wrapped around her and is looking down at her while Amy looks up at him.

"No sorry! I was just lost thinking about how cute you guys look in this picture!" Penny says showing her the image.

"Oh that is one of my favorite's and it has such a funny story with it! I was taking a picture of Sheldon in front of this funny sign and this guy rushes up to us and grabs my phone and says .'One image pour les amoureux' and I tell him that Sheldon and I are on our honeymoon and so he says 'Magnifque les amatuers doivent embrasser."

" Amy as cute as you sound speaking French I have no idea what the guy said to you." Penny tells her.

"Oh I am sorry! I forget that you can not understand me Bernadette can." Amy says embarrassed. " Well the guy first says "One picture for the lovers?" then when he discovers he are newlyweds he says "Wonderful! the lovers must kiss!" and he keeps chanting kiss at us. Sheldon can not understand a word he is saying so he leans down to ask me to explain and that is when the guy snapped this picture. "

"Well as creepy as that guy sounds he did take an adorable picture of you guys." Bernadette says.

"What were you saying before that Amy ?" Penny asks her.

"I was just saying that Sheldon is in the zone again and I hope he snaps out of before your wedding so he can fulfill his duties as best man."

"How long has he been in the zone this time?" Bernadette asks.

"Since we got on the plane on our way back from our honeymoon, he said he felt inspired and started scribbling in his notebook like mad. I had to go get him a new white board he has filled three of them. " Amy says proudly.

"Do you think he is on to something this time?" Bernadette asks her.

"You know I really think that he is, he was up all night working."

"I am sorry Ames! I know it is rough when he gets in the zone. He used to drive Leonard crazy when he got like that." Penny tells her.

"No need to be sorry, it is a pleasure to see is mind at work. I staid up with him last night to watch him work it is incredibly sexy." Amy says and Bernadette and Penny exchange looks but say nothing.

"Speaking of my wedding I have a few thoughts I wanted to run past you…" Amy tries to pay attention to what Penny is saying but her mind keeps wandering to last night.

Amy drove Sheldon home like usual on a Friday but he was silent he had been silent for the past week. Amy did not mind she knew his beautiful mind was at work and needed quiet to do so. Amy stopped and picked up take out for dinner, Mexican ,her favorite. Sheldon ate his dinner mechanically, he could have been eating lamb or fried crickets for all he cared. Food was purely sustenance at this point, taste was irrelevant. After dinner he got up and immediately returned to his white boards, alternating between scribbling furiously and staring at them blankly.

Sheldon needed a shower and he needed to shave, he was starting to get a five o clock shadow a feat that took him a week. This morning he had not even bothered to comb his hair, Amy had to practically dress him. Amy had made a promise to herself when she married him, a silent vow, that when he got like this she would support him. She had watched Leonard nag and cajole him to snap out of it and it never worked. Sheldon did not snap out of it until he was ready and she would be standing with next to him when he did.

Amy took a shower put on one of Sheldon's old shirts and a robe and joined him again in the living room. Amy curled up on the couch with a book at watched him work for hours. It was getting late and Amy was getting tired. Amy checked the time nearly three in the morning and he showed no signs of stopping.

"Goodnight" Amy tells him kissing him on the cheek then turning to walk in the bedroom. Amy is shocked when she feels his hand grasp her wrist and she spins around to face him.

"Did you stay awake with me while I worked?" Sheldon asks.

"Yes, but it is really late now so I am going to go to bed." Amy tells him

"You aren't going to tell me I am being crazy and force me to go to bed?" Sheldon asks her confused.

"No,I do not think you are being crazy, the human body can regulate itself and when your body reaches its limit it will need rest but right now rest for you will not be possible." Amy smiles at him and he tugs her closer pulling her into an embrace. Amy is surprised but hugs him back tightly he leans down and kisses her.

This kiss feels different hungry and searching ,his hands untie her robe and he pushes it off her shoulders. He stops kissing her long enough to pull off her t shirt.

"Sheldon…" Amy begins but Sheldon speaks first.

"I need you Amy" he says his voice quaking under the admission. Just him saying that almost sends her over the edge. Sheldon has just admitted that like food and water he needs her. When he is like this he ignores anything that might cause him to lose focus but he still needs her.

Sheldon's hands roam upwards to cup her breasts. His long fingers expertly teasing her harden nipples making her moan against his mouth. Sheldon breaks the kiss and latches his mouth onto one of the stiffened peaks making her gasp. Sheldon begins his onslaught and Amy let's her hands wander to his belt she undoes it and frees him from the confines of his pants. Amy grabs him matching the rhythm of her hand to his mouth. The sensations are to much for her and after almost a week of neglect she finds her release quickly. Sheldon isn't done though and he picks her up and carries her to the couch and slams her down. His body covers her immediately and he wastes no time thrusting into her. His movements are hard he is not being gentle but Amy likes it. She wraps her legs around his waist and grabs his behind begging him to thrust harder. It feels primal somehow like he is acting on pure instinct.

"Amy!" it is Penny's turn to snap Amy out of it.

"I am sorry I am just worried about Sheldon."

The guys are down in the old apartment playing a card game. Sheldon is not participating he is standing at his white boards mumbling to himself.

" This is as bad as I have ever seen him." Howard says.

"I know, I hope he snaps out of it before next week or you will get your chance to be best man Raj." Leonard says.

"Then I hope he stays stuck on loop!" Ray sniffs

"Oh! Loop!" Sheldon exclaims and starts writing again

"It is not fair I am the one who has the flair for showmanship and I still have yet to be a best man I was gypped out of it at Howards wedding. "

"Hey I think officiating at one and giving away the bride at the other is consolation enough." Howard says throwing down a card.

"Yeah, I guess you are right." Raj says throwing down a card.

"I am just glad that it is Amy who has to take care of him now." Leonard says

"Poor girl just got back from her honeymoon and probably hasn't gotten any since." Howard laughs and the others join in.

"On the contrary." Sheldon says out of the blue "We engaged in coitus just last night on the couch." Sheldon says indicating the couch with his hand. Raj who is the only one sitting on the couch slithers to the ground. The rest of the guys exchange grossed out looks.

"Oh grow up! I have had to endure almost a decade of tawdry and salacious conversation out of you people. I have kept my mouth shut as you discuss the nitty gritty of your sex lives and I say one thing and it is the end of the world!" Sheldon says.

"Kept your mouth shut?" Howard begins but Leonard stops him.

"You're right, we are sorry, it might help if you stopped referring to it as coitus, it just makes it sound clinical and gross."

"I disagree, to my ear all the other terms are rather vulgar"

"Fine, So how are things with you guys? Are you settling into married life alright." Howard says but Sheldon is gone again staring at his whiteboard unblinkingly.

Sheldon stands at his board in his office his head is swimming , he is close to a breakthrough he can feel it. Being inside his head is never easy sometimes the thoughts and images come at him so fast it is hard to sort them.

"Grrrrrr" the sound rips through the silence he looks around flummoxed as to what made it then he hears it again. He looks down and realizes that it is coming from his own stomach. Then he realizes that he is hungry, famished, he cannot remember if he has even had breakfast. He looks at his watch almost three, the cafeteria has stopped serving lunch an hour ago.

"Drat." he says annoyed that no one came to get him for lunch. He goes to his desk to get his phone to call Amy and give her a piece of his mind. When he picks up his phone he sees that he already has a text from her.

Came to get you for lunch but you were too deep in the zone and I could not get you to come with me. I brought you lunch back up and its in your mini-fridge.

Sheldon walks to his fridge and sees she has gotten him a bento box from his favorite sushi restaurant and a bottle of green tea. Amy even included the right soy sauce and the chop sticks from the Chinese place, she remembered that he hates plastic chopsticks. Sheldon smiles as he pulls out his lunch there is a little note on top in Amy's neat handwriting.

Hope this is OK, I wanted to get you something that would taste good cold and not get "squishy". See you around six love you. She signed it Dr. Amy Cooper. Sheldon smiles again, leave it to that vixen. Finding a way to distract him from two buildings away.

He must say marriage is suiting him better than he ever thought it would. It is like when he let the dungeons and dragons dice make decisions for him but better because he actually liked the things Amy picked for him. Letting Amy do things for him had freed his mind for more important things he had gotten more accomplished in the last week than he had the year previous. He thinks about the Friday night how his mind had felt stretched thin. He had been lost in a quagmire of numbers and facts circling around and never finding a way out. Then Amy had kissed his cheek and for a moment he was found. Then he thinks about what happened on the couch, the next day he thought Amy would be mad at him he had acted like an animal in heat. He used her body to ease the tension that had been growing inside him. Again Amy had surprised him she was not mad at all, in fact she seemed jubilant.

Sheldon finishes his food, it is good and his stomach stops growling. He checks his watch, it nearly four now. He throws away his lunch things sets his trashcan outside his office so his office his not filled with a foreign smell and heads down the hall to use the facilities. Along the way he sees Leonard he has his satchel on like he is heading home, it is too early for home.

"Hey good to see you out and about we were getting worried." Leonard says.

"Are you leaving?" Sheldon asks.

"Yeah, just a little early the guys and I have to go for our final tux fittings and you already have a tux because you bought one for your wedding."

"Well its makes sense, why risk a strangers sweat on two different occasions so close together." Sheldon tells him.

"It makes all the sense in the world." Leonard tells him clapping his hand on his shoulder. Sheldon can tell his comment was sarcastic but he has no idea why. Leonard says good by and walks away and Sheldon shrugs his shoulders, sometimes he forgets how tedious Leonard can be.

Sheldon gets back to his office and stands at his board and his mind feels fuzzy. He sits on the edge of his desk and his hand hits a piece of paper it sticks to his hand. He looks down at it annoyed at first at the unfamiliar hot pink sticky note. Nothing of his is ever that violent a hue, he peels it off his hand and glares at it. Its Amy's note and he smiles again, his eyes hit on the word squishy it reminds him of the time he told Barry that he enjoyed squishing all of Amy's parts. If he had only knew then how enjoyable squishing parts with her could be he could saved himself a lot of trouble. Sheldon's eyes feel tired he should have gotten more sleep last night. He looks at his boards again there is just something he is missing if he could only focus he could find it.

Amy walks in, odd she is still wearing her lab coat she normally takes that off before she washes up for the day. Amy is also wearing her yellow high heels the ones that make her feet hurt. Sheldon is about to tell her off for wearing such insensible shoes to work. All he will hear about tonight is how much her feet hurt. Then she opens up her lab coat and reveals that she is wearing her Wonder Woman underwear the ones he bought her and she never wears. His mouth goes dry and he is speechless what if someone were to walk in his office?

"I just got off the phone with the Nobel prize committee and you won." She tells him walking over to him slowly.

"I have not published it yet. I have not even finished my work, " Sheldon tells her.

"It doesn't matter, they have been watching you, and they know your work will be brilliant. So they are just going to give it to you." Amy purrs she is inches from his face now.

"But that is not fair! I don't want it just given to me I want to earn it and throw it in everyone else's face." Sheldon protests but Amy's mouth is on his and his protests die in his throat.

"Sheldon." he hears through the fog and he feels himself being gently rocked. He wakes up with a start his office has darkened as the sun changed positions. Amy is beside him gently nudging him awake . She is dressed normally no lab coat or yellow shoes. "It is time to go home."

"I was having a dream." Sheldon says sleepily.

"I know, you talk in your sleep, I have been here for a few minutes I did not want to wake you."

"What did I say?"

"Something about a Nobel Prize and making out with Wonder Woman. At the Wonder Woman part I woke you up." Amy says embarrassed.

"It was you, you came here in your lab coat and your yellow shoes, and you told me that I won the Nobel prize. I kept trying to tell you I have not earned it yet."

"When did Wonder Woman show up?" Amy asks irrationally annoyed at her husbands dream.

"That was you too you were wearing the underwear I bought you that you don't like."

"You were dreaming about me? Do you do that often?" Amy says changing from irritated to extremely flattered.

"On occasion not usually that saucy a fantasy I will admit. There was one time when I fell asleep waiting for students to show up to one of my lectures .Then I had a dream that you were one of my students and you were wearing that school girl outfit. I found out that you cheated on your mid terms and I had to spank you."

"Come on let's go home."

Sheldon seems better on the car ride home it is the most responsive he has been in days. When she asked him what he wanted for dinner he gave her an answer she decides that it is as good of time as any to broach the subject that she has been needing to discuss with him.

"You know Leonard and Penny are getting married next week."

"Yes, I ran into Leonard today he said they were going to get fitted for tuxes today. Best thousand dollars I ever spent buying one of my own even if I never go to another wedding." Sheldon says.

"Are you going to be OK to perform your duties as best man?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" Sheldon asks confused.

"You have been consumed with your work lately and Penny told me that Leonard is worried you may not be able to perform your duties." Amy begins but Sheldon interrupts.

"Needy baby greedy baby, his mothers book was right leave it to Leonard to be worried about himself when I am on the cusp of a breakthrough."

"Sheldon you didn't let me finish I was going to say if you did not feel like you were up to performing the tasks expected that it was OK."

"You are not going to tell me that I am being selfish, and that Leonard stood by my side at my wedding and social convention dictates I do the same for him."

"No, I was not, I was merely voicing a concern of Leonard's. I will tell you that if you do not think you can do it the right thing to do would be to tell him now so that other arrangements can be made."

At the word "arrangements" though his mind snags and he pushes through to the next level. Sheldon gets out his notes and thumbs through them rips out a few pages then starts a new page fresh. Amy sighs looks like she has lost him again the rest of the car ride is in silence.

Sheldon stands back and looks at his board it is done, he knows that. He gets the feeling that one gets when they know they have accomplished something great. This is his magnum opus he is sure of it this time, what he is looking at now is his chance at a Nobel prize.

"Amy! are you seeing this." he calls over his shoulder. Amy does not answer him and he turns around to see that she is not there. He checks his watch it is nearly four o clock in the morning. Amy must have gone to bed already. He goes to the bedroom and sees her curled up on her side of the bed looking peaceful. He walks over and shakes her awake she startles and looks at him bleary eyed.

"Get up Amy!" Sheldon says excited.

"S'whats the matter? I thought we already had our biannual safety drill?" Amy asks confused.

"We did the day before our wedding, but this is more important than any safety drill .Come with me, you are going to need these." Sheldon says grabbing her glasses and handing them to her he is like a kid on Christmas morning as he grabs Amy's hand and tugs her out of bed. It figures Amy thinks to herself the one day she decided to head to bed early without him and he wakes her up in the middle of the night. Sheldon drags her into the bedroom and places her in front of his board. Amy stares at it blankly and Sheldon bounces on the balls of his feet too excited to stand still. Amy eyes adjust and the magnitude of what she is seeing before her sinks in. Amy is no physicist but she understands enough to see that Sheldon has discovered something huge.

"Sheldon did you just…" Amy begins

"I did!" Sheldon finishes.

"Do you know what this means?" Amy asks

"I do!" Sheldon crows beyond pleased with himself.

"When are you going to publish?" Amy asks.

"As soon as I can, you have to help me, I need to to take pictures of the board, I need you to transcribe my notes for me, I need you too…" There are so many things that need to be done now that he can't even think of them all.

"Whatever you need I will be there for you to help however I can.," Amy tells him hugging his shoulder.

"I've got to tell Leonard!" Sheldon says.

"Sheldon it is a little late to call, Penny won't be happy if you wake her up." but Sheldon is already out of the door and heading upstairs to Leonard's apartment. Amy debates following him to make him stop but decides that it would be futile. Sheldon returns a short time later dragging a sleepy Leonard clad only in his boxer shirts and a T-shirt.

"Look Leonard!" Sheldon says triumphantly placing Leonard in front of the board. Leonard adjusts his glasses and looks at the board for awhile stunned.

"Sheldon do you realize what you have just done, do you know what this means!" Leonard says excited.

"I think that a Nobel Prize is in my future this time for sure." Sheldon sighs gazing at his board lovingly.

"I think you are right this time." Amy tells him.


	32. The Epilogue Conjecture

**Warning this is pure fluff, I was going to stop but I just couldn't!**

**Epilogue**

Sheldon paced the hallways anxiously torn between is need to be back in the hospital room, his aversion to hospitals, and the fear and anxiety clawing inside of him. For the time being he was banished from the room Amy and his mother had told him to go get some air after he has berated the nurse for her comment. After his mother had told her that he to had been a twin the nurse had stupidly said "Oh twins must run in the family!" Really how thick could you get Amy was the one having the babies, twins would have to run in her family for the statement to be true. Sheldon supposes he should be used to it by now he had heard the same comment a every time it was revealed that he was one half of a twin and his wife was having twins.

When first found out about the baby he had been shocked, true he had agreed to start trying. No reason not to try ,he had won his Nobel prize, he had achieved his lives goal and now was the time to set new ones. Though the thought of a child had been in the abstract, who knows if they would even get pregnant. Amy was older she had a tilted uterus, they could try but the odds did not seem to be in her favor.

Yet after only their first attempt in earnest to conceive she did, leave it to him to be successful in all his endeavors ,he thought bitterly. The thought of caring for a new life was daunting enough by itself it was revealed that the baby was not a baby but in fact babies in the plural. This sent Sheldon into a tailspin, they were fraternal twins, just like he and his sister. The genetic possibilities were endless, they could be anything, boys, girls, one of each, two genius's, a genius and a dullard, two dullards. Not that he would not live them if they were of average intelligence; but then he worried what if he didn't? With he and Amy's prime DNA mix the odds were in favor of intelligence but then again he had come from a family of average intelligence. Sheldon had wanted all the usual tests done and then some. If there were a test to determine what the fetuses future career would be, some sort of fetal aptitude test, he would have ordered that too. All that he could determine about his progeny was that it was a boy and a girl both appearing to be in excellent health.

He feels a hand clasp his shoulder from behind and he jumps a mile. He turns to find Leonard and Penny standing there holding a bouquet of pink and blue balloons.

"How you holding up buddy?" Leonard asks sympathetically

"Are the babies here yet?" Penny chimes in.

"No, no babies yet, for the time being I have been banished from the room though." Sheldon says.

"Uh-oh what did you do?" Penny asks.

"I may have yelled at a nurse." Sheldon says sheepishly

"Come on let's see if we can't gain you access again." Leonard says"Show us what room she is in." They follow him down the hall Sheldon pushes the door open with his shoulder careful not to touch the door with his hands.

"Sheldon I told you don't come back unless you can be nice." Amy calls from the bed.

"He promises that he will be nice!" Penny calls from the doorway.

"Penny is that you!" Amy calls come in, they all file inside. Amy is laying on the bed curled on her back. Her stomach is huge and she has a book propped on it. Mary is on one side of the bed and Peggy is on the other both anxiously awaiting the twins arrival. Sheldon sinks into an arm chair and crosses his arms. Penny buts her balloons down and goes to hug Amy.

"Amy! look at you are you sure that you are not having octuplets?" Penny yells.

"I feel like I am having a litter but there better only be two in there." Amy says grumpily.

"So how soon should we expect there arrival." Leonard asks.

"Her water broke at six o clock this morning, she is nine centimeters dilated, and 70% effaced. Honestly at this point I think she is holding them in." Sheldon says.

"Shelly! that is strike one don't make us banish you again." Mary scolds. Sheldon hushes up but gives her a sour look.

"Maybe if she had skipped the epidural like I suggested then she could feel when she was ready."

"Sheldon I was not about to squeeze two watermelons out the opening the size of a lemon without something knocking me out." Amy says

"Hardly watermelons! And babies are born very flexible and bendy to make the passage easier… Sheldon starts to say more but Penny interrupts.

" Strike two Sheldon, Amy is right on this one."

"Oh give him a break guys, he is just nervous, I can't believe Sheldon is going to be a father. If you had asked me who out of all of us would be the first to have kids my answer would not have been Sheldon." Leonard says.

"Neither would my answer been myself, but Amy's fertile womb and my energetic sperm had different ideas." Sheldon grouses.

"That's enough mister! You wanted children as much as I did." Amy says getting emotional.

"I am sorry, Amy you know how uncomfortable hospitals and crowds make me." Sheldon says.

"I know, just please attempt to be comforting for me OK?"

"I'll try." He gets up and stands next to her and grabs her hand. Just then the Dr. walks in to check the progress. He checks her while everyone looks politely away and announces it is time to push.

"Who do you want in the room with you?" The doctor asks eying the entourage surrounding the bed.

"Just my husband" Amy says and the others all give her a hug goodbye and file out to go to the waiting room.

In the waiting room they meet Howard, Bernadette, and Raj who are just arriving.

"Any babies yet?" Bernadette asks.

"Not yet but she is just starting to push so it should not take much longer." Penny says.

"I don't know honey I pushed for almost ten hours before Amy finally came out." Peggy tells her.

"Sheldon shot out of me so fast there wasn't anytime to get to the hospital! Good thing I was in the towel aisle at the K-Mart because he made it into a slip and slide. So you just never know."Mary says simply, Penny and Bernadette look at each other grossed out.

" Is Sheldon in there with her?" Raj asks curiously.

"Yeah, she kicked everyone else out." Penny answers.

"I can't believe that he is staying in there with her. I mean he hates hospitals, screaming, and bodily fluids" Howard says taking a sip of water from a water bottle.

"Oh as long as he stays by her head he should be fine! He almost passed out when Missy gave birth but he did just fine in the end. I mean he is a Nobel prize winning scientist I think he can handle a baby being born." Mary never missed an opportunity to mention her sons accomplishment.

"I don't know I have seen him pass out over less." Penny says.

"And he has a Nobel prize in physics it is Amy who is the biologist. Sheldon has never done well with the human body." Leonard says.

"Who wants to make a bet he passes out and they have to wheel him out on a gurney like in some bad sitcom?" Raj says laughing. Mary and Peggy give him dirty looks.

"I feel bad for poor Amy! Popping two babies out of her hoo ha at one time! Her body is never going to be the same, and then she will have two babies at once! Double the crying, double the diapers!" Bernadette laments

"I don't know it might not be so bad and they are having a boy and a girl so they are just getting it all over with at once. I think having twins would be fun, wasn't it fun Mary?" Howard asks Sheldon's mom.

"Oh lord no honey! Those two fought like cats and dogs before they even came out of me! Then it seemed like they never slept at the same time you had one up a squalling you would get them to sleep and the the other one would see fit to start! I don't think I slept until they were almost three years old! But that's why me and Peggy are here to help Amy out for a bit and make sure Shelly doesn't go off the deep end once the babies are home."

"Good thing they bought the house with the prize money looks like it is going to be a full house for a while." Leonard says.

Back in the hospital room Sheldon holds Amy's hand as she pushes hard and cries out from the effort. His hand is quite sore and Amy has been crushing it for the last twenty minutes but he keeps strong.

"Almost there, the baby is crowning one more push." the doctor says Sheldon has been keeping his eyes on Amy's face trying not to look downwards. But his curiosity gets the better if him and he looks past the doctors dark glossy hair and sees the baby about to come out. Sheldon shuts his eyes tight and starts feeling week in the knees and he tries desperately to keep it together. Amy let's out a tired moan and bears down one last time and he hears crying.

"He is out ;baby boy Cooper is here!" he opens his eyes to see the doctor holding a damp and bloody baby. The baby has a cap of dark hair and his screaming at the top of his lungs.

"Congratulations! Does daddy want to cut the cord?" Sheldon looks at the baby and the wet rope still attached to his belly. He swallows deeply, he can do this. Sheldon shakes his head OK and walks over to the baby the doctor hands him the scissors and he cuts the cord. Once severed from his tether the baby is handed off to a nurse who cleans him off and weighs him. Amy is given a brief respite and Sheldon watches as his son his bundled and a cap is put on his head.

"Do you want to hold him?" the nurse asks and Sheldon nods the nurse places him in his arms and Sheldon cradles him like he is a bomb. Sheldon looks at the babies tiny features how can something so tiny and so new look so perfect he thinks. The baby opens his bleary eyes slate blue still, and Sheldon swears he sees a spark of intelligence in them not present in any other baby he has met. He walks the baby slowly over to Amy and holds him down so that she can see him. Amy holds out a weak hand and strokes his soft cheek.

"Meet your son Sheldon Lee Cooper Junior." Sheldon says beaming at her.

"Oh, he is so beautiful, he looks just like you. Oooooooo" Amy says as she feels the sensation to push again. Sheldon looks around helplessly and a nurse comes and takes Sheldon Junior from him. Sheldon grabs Amy's hand again as she pushes again.

"Baby two is coming quicker! She is not as stubborn as her brother was." The doctor says "Once more and you've got it!" Amy gives one last push and the baby comes out just as loud and bloody as her brother. They clean up the baby girl and a nurse places her on Amy's chest. Sheldon is already holding the Sheldon Junior again walks him over to Amy and places him next to his sister. They hear a timid knock on the door.

"Can we come in yet?"

"Yes, we are all cleaned up now come met the babies." Amy calls and everybody files into the room and gathers around the bed.

"They are so beautiful!" Penny says tearing up.

"I still think you missed a great chance not naming them Luke and Leia." Howard says and Bernadette slaps him on the shoulder.

"No, we agreed no Star Wars names, meet Sheldon Junior and Ruby Elizabeth."

"Ruby Elizabeth that is a beautiful name for a beautiful girl!" Penny cries.

"Thank you, we named her after my grandma and Sheldon's Memaw."

"Enough of all this yakking I want to hold a baby!" Mary cries and she scoops Sheldon Jr. out of Amy's arms. "Oh my do you look just like your daddy when he was a baby." Mary croons gently rocking the baby.

"I want to hold one too!" Peggy says and she takes Ruby from Amy and unfolds her blankets to look at her hands and feet. " I did this when your mommy was born making sure it is all there."

"How are you feeling." Bernadette asks Amy

"Considering I just pushed two human beings out of my lady parts I'm as well as can be expected." Amy tells her.

"We got the babies some gifts." Bernadette says handing Amy a bag. "They will be a little to big for them now but they will grow into them." Amy opens the back and pulls out a miniature astronaut flight suit and a tiny lab coat.

"Awww, those are adorable!" Amy says.

" So they can dress like daddy, or the much cooler uncle Howie." Howard says and Sheldon gives him a look.

"I do not wear a lab coat." Sheldon tells him.

"I got them something they can wear now." Raj says handing her another bag Amy opens it up a pulls out a blue onesie that says almond joy and a red one that says mounds.

" I don't get it?" Amy says

" Turn it around." Raj tells her and Amy reads the back of the blue one.

"Almond joys got nuts." then she flips around the red one "Mounds don't" Amy starts laughing and so does everyone else.

"I still don't get it." Sheldon says.

"Sheldon your wife just gave birth to babies you made the old fashioned way! We can not keep explaining these things to you." Howard chides.

Everyone takes turns holding each of the babies until, it is time for Amy to try and nurse and they leave the couple alone with the promise to visit again the next day.

Leonard and Penny arrive back at the apartment building and climb the stairs. They are saving up for a house of their own but Penny's bad credit is making it difficult. The walk past apartment 4B and Leonard stops and starts to open it with his key.

"Leonard! What are you doing we have not lived in that apartment for almost four years." Penny tells him, Leonard looks at the door dazed "One more flight of stairs remember?"

"Oh right, it is hard to believe that someone else lives there now and Sheldon and Amy gave been gone almost six months."

"Well you could hardly expect them to stay in a two bedroom apartment with two babies. Also it is a lot easier to find a house when you can pay for it in full.I still can't believe that Sheldon is a father, and that he made the babies, himself, with no fertility clinics involved ."

"There are a lot of things I can not believe about Sheldon now, that he is Nobel prize winner, that he is a tenured professor, that he is somebody's husband on purpose. Seems like he has everything he has every wanted and something's he never knew he did." Leonard says a little bitterly as he opens the door to the apartment. Sure Leonard had some of the things that he had always wanted as well. The day he married Penny had been the best day of his life. Even Sheldon making his entire toast them about what an annoying houseguest Penny had been did not put a damper on his spirits that day. Yet that was almost two years ago now and there were more things he wanted that seemed just out if his grasp. Leonard wanted children desperately but Penny was still on the fence. Leonard was whittling down the amount credit card debt they had but it would be awhile before they could buy a house. Then there was Sheldon whom for a while he was sure would be living in the mother in laws suite of his future house like some sort of recluse the rest of his life. Leonard was happy for him he was but sometimes it did not seem fair the imbalance between them when Sheldon had never wanted all that he had.

"The babies were so cute, it made me think that maybe we should try." Penny tells him Leonard looks at her curiously.

"Don't toy with me." Leonard says.

"I'm not, I mean we have room here at least for a little while and anyways who says we have to own a house, we could rent one for a little bit. My schedule has never been more open since I finished my last movie. Now is as good of as a time as any to try. Plus just think of it if we get pregnant soon then our baby will only be a little younger than Sheldon and Amy's kids it will be like built in playmates."

"Penny are you sure you aren't just saying this because you just spent the afternoon holding a newborn. You know if we have one you can't just hand it back once it starts crying."

"I know that, and maybe I am saying it a little because I was just holding a baby. So what if I am! I want one know, before I was just scared. Scared that I could not handle it, but damn it if Sheldon can do it then I can. The way he looked holding his son, that look of extreme love and pride, well I want that for you for us." Leonard takes Penny's hand and starts tugging her towards the bedroom.

"Come on let's go put a baby in you."

"Leonard! I am still on birth control, I will stop taking it but it will still take awhile."

"Then let's go practice for when I do put a baby in you."

Three years later

Howard and Bernadette pull into the drive way of Sheldon and Amy's house. The twins are turning three and today they are having a party for them.

"I hope they like the presents we got them." Bernadette says gingerly getting out of the car and navigating her belly out of the door.

"I think they will, but in our defense it is fairly hard to shop for twin child prodigy's."

"I know, I love them to death but they can be kind of creepy. The other day I was watching them for Amy and Junior turned to me and said 'Even though you are not my flesh and blood I still call you Aunt Bernie, my mommy says it is called a turn of phrase.' he is three and talks more eloquently than my ten year nephew."

"I think the creepy part about him is how much he looks like his father. He even has that condescending stare, its like he cloned himself. You know given Sheldon's intelligence and Amy's background in biology; I would not be surprised to find out that the twins are clones." Howard says.

"I don't think that he cloned himself, he would have been bragging all over town if he had successfully cloned himself." Bernadette says and Howard gives her an I guess your right look.

"Do you think little Howard Junior will be a genius?" Howard asks rubbing Bernadette's belly affectionately as they walk up to the door.

"I told you I am still on the fence about naming him Howard Jr. besides we don't know what the baby is yet it could be a girl. Our baby will be incredibly intelligent but you can't go comparing our child to the twins."

"I know, I know, I still can't believe that you don't want to find out the sex of the baby."

"Half the fun is not knowing!" Bernadette says knocking on the door; Sheldon answers it immediately.

"Ah, now the gang is all here, Ruby was just remarking that it was ten minutes past the start time for the party."

"Sorry, we had to stop so I could go to the bathroom, the baby is using my bladder as a punching bag."

"Ruby is punctual, just like her Daddy." Howard says sarcastically handing two gift bags to Sheldon.

"You have no idea, you know she optimized our schedules so that we could have more family time in the evening? That little lady is going places." Sheldon says beaming and turns around to walk into the living room where everyone is gathered. Penny runs up and grabs Bernadette and gives her a hug her belly just beginning to show signs of growth.

"Bernadette you look like you are going to pop!" Penny says grabbing her belly.

"And I feel like it to!" Bernadette says.

"Are you sure that you are not having twins as well?" Sheldon asks. " Because your stomachs circumference is rivaling Amy's at this point in her pregnancy."

"It's just one!" Bernadette snaps and flounces on the couch.

"Sheldon that was rude, I am sure that Bernadette does not want to be reminded of her immense girth currently." Amy says walking into the room with the twins. The party is just the family and friends gathering around to celebrate. Not your typical children's party with party games or balloons. Though the twins did try to get everyone to play a rousing game of counterfactuals's but not even their parents could figure out the answers.

After the twins go to bed ;the gang hang around to catch up without the children. It has been awhile since they have been able to spend time together with everyone's schedule s changing. The guys still see each other at work, but hardly ever get to hang out afterwards.

"This is nice, I miss getting to have an adult conversation." Amy tells them.

"I don't know Sheldon Jr. talks better than some adults that I know." Howard says.

" He does, doesn't he." Sheldon says his voice full of pride.

"I miss us all hanging out together, we should make time to do this more often." Penny says.

"Yeah, it was much easier when we all lived in the same building, or in some of our cases the same apartment." Leonard says.

"It is odd thinking about how the four of us shared an apartment." Amy says.

"Oh yeah, I was just referring to Sheldon and I, but we did all live together for awhile didn't we?" Leonard says

"How could you forget? Worst, weeks of my life, it was like Sodom and Gomorrah, or the days of Caligula. All those people sharing one small space! Every night was like a Latin orgy." Sheldon laments.

"I don't know, it was kind of fun." Penny says.

"I agree, it was nice having everyone together. It kind of made up for all the slumber parties that I never had." Amy says.

"I did not mind it either." Leonard says.

"Fine! If everyone was so OK with sharing an tiny two bedroom apartment maybe we should all just stay here tonight. Have a giant pajama party before everyone else's life is changed forever by parenthood!" Sheldon says sarcastically.

"Sounds great!" Amy says.

"OK!" Leonard and Penny say together.

"I'll make the popcorn !" Raj says dashing for the kitchen.

"I'm sorry are we actually doing this?" Sheldon asks as everyone makes plans for the night around him.

**Authors Note**

**Ok this really is the end this time, thank you so much for reading and reviewing it in spite of its grammatical mistakes. I had so much fun writing this and I am working on new one where Shamy goes to Texas, thoughts? Also I am on the hunt for a beta to send my stories to before publishing for feedback and to catch my country grammer. PM me if you would like to volunteer, you would also gain the title of my best friend.**


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